In case you missed the premiere, Trump is back in a non-celebrity season this time around. He’s set the lofty goal for himself to add a silver lining to one lucky contestant’s tear jerking sob story. Our economy’s recession has crushed the dreams of the sixteen
losersaspiring apprentices. They are penniless and unemployed but Trump plans to end their bad streak of luck. Hey, maybe he should just give Sarah Palin a run for 2012. With a promise to help end the recession as his platform, he has more than a snowball’s chance. Heck, his chance is greater than the chance that Palin can wave at Putin from her front porch. You betcha. Contestants were put right to work last week as they were tasked with designing an ultra-modern workspace with Mr. Trump himself as the judge. To get caught up on the premiere and to see which loser got the first boardroom boot, check out AJane’s stellar recap.
I Scream, You Scream...We All Scream When We Hear The Price
This week’s task is simple…make money and lots of it. Teams will be selling ice cream all over the city. The team that turns the biggest profit wins the task. George and Donnie will be eyes and ears for Donald. David feels he has something to prove to the guys so he volunteers to be project manager for his team. As an unemployed sales rep, he feels he has an advantage and the women don’t have a chance in hell. Someone forgot to tell this dude that pride goeth before the fall. Poppy will be leading the women. She has no experience in sales and feels a bit under qualified as a 23 year old, but plans to give it her all.
David thinks that street sales will require something to draw the crowds so he puts James and Alex in charge of costumes. James was hoping to fly under the radar; however, he’s from New York City, so his input is necessary. He thinks Union Square will be a good place to sell their ice cream. When they get their cart set up though, no one is buying. They’re all yelling “ice cream!” and taking an aggressive, in your face approach that turns James off. He doesn’t think it’s qualifies as a sales strategy and doesn’t think it will work. When David shows up, he says as much and David moves them to a new spot with a new game plan.
Poppy puts Mahsa in charge of location, Stephanie in charge of sales, and Liza in charge of accounting. There’s some concern that Poppy will be overpowered as a PM by Stephanie. They set up shop on the corner that the men abandoned when they changed locations and get off to a slow start as well. It’s also a little bumpy. They had agreed to charge $5 for the ice cream and right away, Liza told someone they would take $3. The guy didn’t like that he was told two different prices and walked away. Stephanie takes Poppy aside and tells her to put her foot down. She’s the one riding the women, basically being the BIC…Bitch In Charge. One woman tells them they should be ashamed of themselves charging that much for an ice cream sandwich. They decide that they should look more like a brand so a couple of them run over to a store and buy hot pink tank tops for everyone. In theory, it’s a good idea; but they throw them all on top of the clothes they’re wearing and end up looking like the homeless ladies on the other end of Union Square. Stephanie starts selling cases rather than singles and before long the girls are doing a little better. Guess NYC can relate to that sloppy homeless look. And to overpriced ice cream.
Dance Little Monkey, Dance
James and Alex hit the costume shop where they stock up on red and white striped barber shop vests and matching boater hats. The look like dorks and the costumes don’t help them with sales at all. Maybe if they had some cute little juggling monkeys, they could flip their hats over to collect coins from spectators. That’s about all those costumes are worth. David comments that Alex is a follower and you can’t stick a follower out there to sell ice cream. Sadly for Alex, I think that’s foreshadowing at it’s finest, friends. Or maybe I have great psychic ability. Or perhaps I’ve seen so much reality TV that the editing is predictable. The guys happen to look down on the corner where the woman are doing loads of business. It was David’s idea to move but James is worried. He thought it was a good idea to move to their current location in front of the playground. If they lose, he’s worried he might be in trouble. They decide to move again and head over to Father Demo Park. Again, this is at James’ suggestion so he’d better hope the men pull out a win. That or he’ll need to start packing his dorky vest and hat and find a dancing monkey to earn his rent. At $3 a pop, they get off to a slow start but business picks up. Before long, they had the sales pitches down and were using their charm, their looks, their sob stories, and whatever else it took to sell their ice cream.
The afternoon crowd isn’t as nice to the ladies. Although it’s hot outside, no one is buying the ice cream. Donnie Jr. shows up and notes that they’re just steps from one of the busiest subway stops in the city and there is no one working the entrance or exit of it. Stephanie lays into them about that time, telling them to move around and go to the customers. According to her, they aren’t there to hang out and become BFFs and they don’t have time for that crap. While discussing what to do the next day, Stephanie starts lecturing the girls on what to do and not to do…don’t kiss babies, don’t touch dogs, don’t hang out with kids, etc. Poppy feels she’s bossing them around and being too aggressive but doesn’t say one word to her. She sits there and takes it. They all do. Liza notes that Poppy may be the PM but Stephanie is running the show. Stephanie says that if they lose the task and Poppy takes her into the boardroom, she will take her ASS down.
Day two of the task, the men head back to Union Square. They beat the women there and quickly grabbed their corner. Since the women had planned to set up in the same place, they weren’t happy to see the men there. They should have sent Stephanie over with her bitch face on to scare them away. That would have done it. But they don’t. Instead, they set up right next to them. David knew the women would come back to the same spot and he also knew they wouldn’t back down. He figured he’d let the women attract the customers and the men would steal them. Customers were caught in a tug-o-war between the two groups who were fighting for their attention and their money. The men were much louder, more aggressive, and more obnoxious. Finally, the women gave up and moved to the location near the park.
Stephanie: They look like a bunch of serial killer circus monkeys.
At the new location, the women were having better luck. The ice cream was selling quickly. Poppy wanted to talk to Stephanie about who should be brought back into the boardroom should they lose and was looking at Liza since she was lacking in the sales department but Stephanie felt it was too soon to be thinking about that. With very little time left, Tyana had the idea to take the last box of ice cream and give it away to the men’s customers to prevent them from getting a sale. Childish, but it worked.
The Men Take A Lickin'
In the boardroom, sparks fly early when Trump asks Poppy to choose her weakest player. She names Liza and goes even further by saying Liza should be fired because she didn’t have the sales numbers if they lose the task. Liza fires off a list of things she did on the task in her defense. She’s hot enough to melt the ice cream they were selling. Trump shushes her and asks Brandy if Liza should be fired. Brandy agrees that since it was a sales task, Liza should be fired if they lose. Trump then tells Liza she’s fired. Liza's jaw quivers, the others' jaws hit the floor, and collectively, they hold their breath. A few seconds later, Trump tells them he’s only kidding and in somewhat of a crazy mood. What a wild one, that Trump! Liza argues that the women are only throwing her under the bus because she’s a strong player with good ideas. She tells Trump that the task was run by Stephanie, and not Poppy. And because he likes to toy with them and he’s still in that crazy mood, Trump wants to know if that means Stephanie should be fired and not Poppy if they lose. Liza says Poppy should be fired, so Poppy tells Trump that she's just getting personal now. Mahsa wouldn’t fire Poppy and was impressed by her as a PM. Trump hassles her a bit for saying she knows they won before he moves on to harass the men.
David quickly sells out Alex and James as his team’s weakest players. Both Gene and Wade think James should be fired if their team loses. Donnie points out that James is quietly nodding as if he’s in agreement; however, James defends himself. They would have never been at the Father Demo location without him nor would they have worn the
dorkyvests without him. He and David take a couple of shots at each other but Trump has had enough. He asks Gene if their team has won and Gene answers, “Absolutely.” Turns out Gene is absolutely wrong because while the men turned a profit of $1500, the women raised $1800. Poppy, as PM, will have the opportunity to meet with business icon Jack Welch, who formerly ran General Electric. The women are sent out where as they watch, Poppy tries to congratulate them all. As she does, Liza interrupts and says, “Don’t even look at me, bitch.” Brandy tells her not to call Poppy a bitch and that she’s only isolating herself now but Liza isn’t hearing it. Someone else shushes them so they can watch now and argue later. Too bad because a good catfight would make better TV. The firing is kind of predictable.
The guys all agree that it was a sales task so James and Alex get thrown under the bus for not selling as much as the others. Trump sends everyone else out and James defends himself. Alex tries but stutters through his defense. David thinks his team could do without either of them and feels he was at home with his five children because he had to babysit and handhold them the whole time. They dance around a bit but finally, Alex is asked if he can be in the league with the rest of the men. He says that he can be. Both James and good old George point out that he said he can be, not that he is. Trump feels Alex simply doesn’t share the same passion as the other guys so he’s fired. The writing on the walls was clear this time. We did learn that Alex went from selling popsicles on the show to his dream job in construction management so don’t feel to badly for him. He’s doing better than most of us.
Next week, teams will be running a hotel for dogs. Liza continues her fight with the girls and James takes David head on. My partner AJane will be back for the smack down.
Would you pay $5 for an ice cream sandwich or to see a dancing monkey?