Awesome, awesome job, Hep! I'm elated that I'll be able to enjoy not only this hilarious show, but your smashing recaps as well! Brilliant writing as always . . . you rock!
Some of my favorite moments:
Originally Posted by Heppy-SanI hear Chicago is a cool place. After all, itĎs home to cutthroat billionaires, elevated trains, and on occasion, reality TV website conventions. Plus, every March they dump green dye into their river. And didnít Harrison Ford run around in the streets looking for a one-armed man? Chicago: a city so cool they put pickles and tomatoes on their hot dogs. Iím convinced.
What with Trump, Cuban and Branson also playing reality TV mentor, Iím starting to think billionaires are all fluffy pink teddy bears with hearts as big as all get-out under their vampiric, money grubbing exteriors.
Their tortuous journey begins with them being driven aimlessly around Chicago while they stew in each otherís presence, undoubtedly forbidden by producers to speak to one another. Since they canít see out, they arenít even aware of how pointless the journey is. Itís a beautiful day for mind games.
I feel compelled to point out that anyone who has witnessed the drunken hazings of Greek Week would not be so quick to label college students as ďsmart.Ē
Shiny-headed Douglas, we learn, is a star analyst for an investment bank. Kerry is a top executive at a major media corporation, and has the pouty collagened lips to prove it. Damian, the clean-cut blonde with the firm jaw, was valedictorian of his business school. What glowing Christmas letters their mamas must send out every November 15th.
The others are eye candy, weíre told. Thatís it. I donít know why they only introduced three of them, but thatís what they did. So, letís move along, nothing to see here. *swinging nightstick*
We already know he lies for a living, so if it turns out to be Gary Coleman or Lassie some equally lame boss, donít send me the hate mail, please.
Still lined up and standing at attention, you can practically see the dollar signs glowing in the competitorsí hopeful eyes.
We watch the chef create another culinary delight as a hunk of Spam is converted into appetizing little meatballs. Itís all in the presentation, folks.
The women proclaim the men to be Team
. . .Concad. Hey, what happened to My Bitches? ďConĒ is because men are big oleí meanie liars, and ďcadĒ refers to un-gentlemenlike behavior. *crickets chirping* Great job, women. And by great, I mean excessively lame.
Michael was this weekís Team Boss, which I failed to mention earlier since he was never shown leading his team in any capacity. However, now it is up to Michael to make the Jellicle Choice (with apologies for the Cats reference).
Donít hate me because Iím self-employed. firstname.lastname@example.org