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Thread: Catfish- MTV

  1. #261
    Rumbelle - so many feels Little Sew&Sew's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    I'm not sure that I'd side with the girl (Jesse) in this part. It didn't say WHICH ONE decided it wasn't going to work. If the condition of her house was any indication of how she lived day-to-day, I'm not surprised things didn't work out. The guy (Brian) hadn't been out of the Marines for that long - while it's not true for everyone, there is a reason they say "once a Marine, always a Marine". Her clutter and chaos would definitely go against the cleanliness and order the Corp taught him. While being a messy housekeeper isn't necessarily the sign of a mental illness, I'm not really sure there weren't some "issues" for her as well. She was the one ready to go off - with her parents blessing - to a TRUCK STOP to meet up with a guy she'd "known" for about a year.

    The "weapons of mass destruction" thing was blown way out of proportion (pun not intended). While having PTSD can put a twist in your shorts, it doesn't necessarily make you unlovable, doomed to living life alone because you MIGHT get angry.
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  2. #262
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    He stuck me as very controlling and unpredictable. Didn't she say that when she hadn't talked to him by a particular time that they had planned on, he went "off" on her and talked crazy and rough to her? The "weapons of mass destruction" was just one more nail in his coffin, as far as I was concerned.....not to mention that he never told her that he was married when he had arranged to meet her at some creepy, out-of-the-way place. His family was a little too "ho-ho-ho!" for me, and seemed anxious to get him "hooked up". THEY even creeped me out. The day he got arrested, he admitted to having "flashbacks" and seeing things that weren't there, and putting on flak jacket to protect himself against what was NOT there. No, no, no....this guy was nothing to fool around with. There's a huge "Hell-To-The-No" connected this one.

    She was a strange and immature girl, to say the least. Her hiding behind Max, and always saying "I'm scared!" was bizarre. I don't think that girl is ready for adult life, just yet. Maybe her inner voice was guiding her; our inner voices have a way of trying to protect us when we may not being making the best decisions. In some ways, she was like a child. She should be grateful that she probably dodged a bullet; PTSD is nothing to play with. Him wanting her to move to where he was would cut her off from HER family and support system, which is generally not a good idea when you've involved yourself with somebody that you really don't know. I'd be curious as to what his ex-wife would have to say.
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    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  3. #263
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    I think I have a different take on it. The story the guy told was his story. It could have been true or perhaps it was not. I do know that we hear from the spouses of soldiers who come back with PTSD and it is VERY difficult to deal with. You could end up being strangled in the night. It's a very serious and long lasting condition that is a huge investment of time, energy and emotion on the part of the other person. Your safety is not guarenteed.

    The number of soldiers with this condition who kill their spouse or girlfriend is alarming. They are doing studies on it now. I live in NC where this guy was arrested. I don't know if he was stationed in NC, but violence by returning soldiers here is very high, probably due to the number of military bases we have, such as Fort Lejeune, Fort Bragg, etc.

    I'm all for not judging people, but when you are meeting the person on line, you have to be careful and examine everything about the person. It may seem unfair, but I say better safe than sorry. There were red flags all over that situation and I sense the girl knew the day she left his house. I suspect that is why she delayed going back Recall how she didn't seem all that enthused to return.

    He had criminal background prior to going into the miliarty. Then the sawed off shotgun. Why would he need a sawed off shot gun? He wouldn't for any legal reason. But he's carrying it in his vehicle? Scary. Then he has pit bulls......I'm sorry. Please don't kick me for the comment about the pit bulls. I know some law abiding people who own them, but here we are talking about an entire picture. It's ringing warning signs all over for me.

    I also wonder if they guy really had gotten help for his condition, since he mistated the name for the condition. He may be a super nice guy, but IMO, it was too risky.

    Just because someone acts nice and has friendly family members doesn't mean they are safe.
    Last edited by Debb70; 08-21-2013 at 04:45 PM.
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  4. #264
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    Did you notice how she kept leaning back when he would lean in to kiss her? I thought her body language was telling. It just screamed, "Something's wrong!"
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  5. #265
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    Yes, I noticed her leaning. I think it was very unwise of Nev to leave her with him that first day right after the intial meeting. I even felt uncomfortable.
    I think Nev dropped the ball on this one. In fact. If I were that girl. I think I would move away with no forwarding address.
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  6. #266
    Pineapple! ClosetRTWatcher's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    I agree that there were a lot of warning signs there. Even if he was now diagnosed with PTSD, that's not something you just "get over" once you realize you have it!

    I thought part of his explanation about the arrest sounded plausible, but I thought he said he had a gun in the car because he had been at a shooting range. Did I mis-hear this? Who would take a sawed off shotgun to a shooting range?? That combined with the fact that he was taking this equipment to meet a girl he met online at a remote truck stop sounds like a recipe for disaster!! I don't recall anything being said about her parents approving of this shady meeting. Did they explicitly say this? I assumed they didn't know.

    I also noticed her leaning away when he would go in to kiss her. I couldn't decide if maybe she was shy in front of the cameras? She couldn't have been that averse to physical contact with him if she went as far as she implied when the cameras weren't around.

    The fact that he yelled at her that he was tired of waiting for her also sounded quite controlling I was very surprised when they said she immediately drove off to be with him after their joint Skype. I was equally surprised that they decided it wasn't going to work after two days, but I think that was probably a very good thing!!

    I also wondered what the ex-wife would have said about how his personality might have changed after his deployment.

  7. #267
    FORT Fogey captain's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    I watched last night and the skeptic in me is putting more blame on her. There was something about her that reminded me of, I cannot think of a better word, tramp. She goes on national tv, meets a guy, sleeps with him right away and then tells the world she did that. I do not know who she is, nor nothing about her. It was just her body language around the males that makes me think this.
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  8. #268
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    Some people will always blame the woman, no matter what. We see a lot of guys do that, and a lot of women, too, unfortunately. No matter the case, I would not want anyone I loved or cared about to be in a situation with this man. The situation seems fraught with danger. Not only is this guy scary, but she also doesn't know this "Fran" guy that she considers her friend.....heck, Fran doesn't even really know this guy; it's like he just wants to feel cool by hanging out with him. What Fran does know is that they both have brain injuries, both have been married, and both divorced after returning from Afghanistan. Fran seems to be coming from a place of hero-worship, from what they showed, which would seemingly make him more protective of the guy. I'd also be curious about the status of his military service discharge. Not enough questions have been asked/answers ascertained with this situation. Nev and Max found out quite a bit of significant information that Jesse did not know.....another HUGE red flag.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  9. #269
    FORT Fogey captain's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    Don't get me wrong here......it was her body language around the men that gave me this vibe. As for him and his background problems, he needs to take more time to heal and get his life together before he brings someone else into it. I do not buy his story that all the charges were dropped, etc. A sawed-off shotgun is illegal in most states.
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  10. #270
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Catfish- MTV

    If you didn't see the show tonight, make sure you don't miss it on Tuesday? Yikes!!!!
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

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