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Thread: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

  1. #741
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay;4066755;
    Catelynn's mother....alcohol and cocaine.....or alcohol and crystal meth? Last night, I thought she looked a bit "meth-y" to me. She and Butch are co-dependent, to say the least.

    Farrah sounds just like her mother when she talks. Guess who she's on her way to turning into?
    I always thought her and Butch seemed meth-y, too, until he said that cocaine was his drug of choice when he got to rehab. I'm guessing she does cocaine as well.

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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    I agree that Catelynn and Tyler need to accept her mother and his father for what they are and move on, but they are very young and may find that difficult to do. They need a couple of years yet to establish themselves--get educations of whatever sort suit their personal talents/goals, whether that's college or technical training of some kind; get their own apartments; learn to live independent lives etc. I'm thankful they have Tyler's mom, their adoption counselor, and Brandon and Theresa on their sides. Given that they were elected prom king and queen, I assume they may also have some friends who support them as well, though we've not seen them. It truly is amazing that they're as together as they are, whatever problems they may have had in the past. I think Farrah's going to be forced to grow up, whether she wants to or not, because there are too many adults--her lawyer, her therapist, even her banker--who are letting her know in no uncertain terms that she needs to can the attitude and take care of business. I hope she does grow up sufficiently to start showing better judgment in how she handles Sophia, before that little girl ends up hurt, because her mother leaves her in some kind of jeopardy. I also couldn't believe Farrah, who's in culinary school and works in a restaurant, could be that stupid about cooking. I'm not talking about the fire, as that might have been the stove malfunctioning and that could happen to anyone. I'm talking about her terrible kitchen skills prior to the fire. I hope things work out for Macy. I don't think Ryan's right at all that she's being selfish, but she could have handled the whole moving to Nashville business better. She waited until the last minute to tell her parents and Ryan, because she was afraid of their reactions, and I don't know that Bentley's paternal grandparents got to say goodbye at all. Kyle seems like a decent guy, but the whole relationship thing is very new to him, and they might have been better off doing the long distance thing a little longer. I also wish they'd establish why Kyle couldn't move to Chattanooga (I assume there was a reason), because obviously, things would have been much simpler if he'd have been the one to move. I don't know what to say about Amber and Gary. Their whole situation is so dysfunctional and sad, particularly for Leah. I don't understand why Gary takes everything he takes from Amber or why he seems so completely devoid of ambition. I know he keeps saying he wants to keep his family together, but there must be more to it than that. We only see his mother--is he trying not to be an absentee father, no matter what the cost? His mother also seems like him in that she wants to avoid confrontation. Is that why he thinks that's how you behave in a relationship? Almost everything about Amber gets on my last nerve, including her incredibly whiny, grating voice. I think it's a good idea for her to get rid of some of her hostility and stress somehow, but I don't know that martial arts fighting is such a good idea for her. It doesn't so much seem to be a way for her to reduce her stress as learn new skills through which to take it out on others, Gary, in particular. She's threatened to hit him on several occasions, and in the previews, they showed her actually punching him in the ear. His reaction--to grab Leah and take off--I can kind of understand. It's exactly what a lot of women would do if the men in their lives hit them like that. The problem is, like a lot of abused women, he keeps going back and taking more abuse. And yeah, I totally agree that someone needs to step in and get Leah to a safe situation until her parents are capable of taking care of her properly. Amber's already yelling at Leah, and she seems to expect more of her than a child that age is likely to be able to give her consistently. Kids Leah's age (heck, kids any age) may know they're not supposed to do something, but that doesn't mean that in the heat of the moment, they're always going to remember that and do the appropriate thing. Amber's also admitted to slapping Leah's hands to teach her not to do something. She has so little control over her temper, I think it's entirely possible that some day, that slap on the hands might escalate to something worse before Amber is able to stop herself--or that Leah will end up hurting herself because her parents are too busy arguing with each other to notice what she's doing. Or she'll simply end up with some kind of stress-induced illness, because she's too little to handle all the constant upheaval in her life. Unfortunately, Gary isn't really a reasonable custodian for Leah either, since he seems so unwilling to do much of anything other than lie around on a couch all day. When I think of Leah, and then think of Carly, I think how much more fortunate the latter is than the former.

  3. #743
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay;4066967;
    I'm concerned that Amber might hurt Leah when her temper gets short, not meaning to hurt her. It happens. I like to see Amber getting some of her negative energy out in the class, but she's got more than most. A part of me would like to see somebody whip her arse. She is out of control. She loves her baby, but I think she's dangerous.

    Leah's going to have one of the worst potty mouths in kindergarten.
    I actually give Gary a ton of credit for not retaliating when Amber threatens him-she gets right in his face over and over again and she seems barely able to control herself not only verbally but physically-she's always looking to punch him and we know she's done so in the past and I'm almost certain she continues to do so. Gary needs to get his daughter out of there fast and he needs to get help not only for Leah but for himself to find out why he allows himself to stay in an abusive relationship. While he was never a small guy by any means, I wonder if his recent weight gain has to do with the way he deals with the constant abuse. This is a domestic violence issue as well as a child neglect issue. Even though I realize Amber learned her behavior from her upbringing that doesn't mean she should not be held accountable in court. If we were watching a man behave the way Amber does we would want his head on a platter. Everything he says and does is so typical of someone who is in a domestic violence situation- he won't leave, he keeps going back to her and he apologizes to her constantly because he now believes it's mostly his fault that Amber screams and yells and physically threatens him. She has said time again Gary is the reason she yells and threatens and becomes physically volatile. In other words `If you didn't do this or that I wouldn't have to yell/hit. It's your fault I do these things to you/our child.'
    When he went back to her his final time he sounded totally and completely broken down emotionally and spiritually. Devoid of life, of self worth of hope. Even his friend, using the cold, hard truth (Amber doesn't love you she hates you) couldn't pull Gary out of his denial, even though there was this momentary flash of realization in Gary's eyes when his friend told him to leave and take Leah with him.
    It's just so disturbing.
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  4. #744
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by Tilde;4067216;
    I agree that Katelyn and Tyler need to accept her mother and his father for what they are and move on, but they are very young and may find that difficult to do. They need a couple of years yet to establish themselves--get educations of whatever sort suit their personal talents/goals, whether that's college or technical training of some kind; get their own apartments; learn to live independent lives etc. I'm thankful they have Tyler's mom, their adoption counselor, and Brandon and Theresa on their sides. Given that they were elected prom king and queen, I assume they may also have some friends who support them as well, though we've not seen them. It truly is amazing that they're as together as they are, whatever problems they may have had in the past. I think Farrah's going to be forced to grow up, whether she wants to or not, because there are too many adults--her lawyer, her therapist, even her banker--who are letting her know in no uncertain terms that she needs to can the attitude and take care of business. I hope she does grow up sufficiently to start showing better judgment in how she handles Sophia, before that little girl ends up hurt, because her mother leaves her in some kind of jeopardy. I also couldn't believe Farrah, who's in culinary school and works in a restaurant, could be that stupid about cooking. I'm not talking about the fire, as that might have been the stove malfunctioning and that could happen to anyone. I'm talking about her terrible kitchen skills prior to the fire. I hope things work out for Macy. I don't think Ryan's right at all that she's being selfish, but she could have handled the whole moving to Nashville business better. She waited until the last minute to tell her parents and Ryan, because she was afraid of their reactions, and I don't know that Bentley's paternal grandparents got to say goodbye at all. Kyle seems like a decent guy, but the whole relationship thing is very new to him, and they might have been better off doing the long distance thing a little longer. I also wish they'd establish why Kyle couldn't move to Chattanooga (I assume there was a reason), because obviously, things would have been much simpler if he'd have been the one to move. I don't know what to say about Amber and Gary. Their whole situation is so dysfunctional and sad, particularly for Leah. I don't understand why Gary takes everything he takes from Amber or why he seems so completely devoid of ambition. I know he keeps saying he wants to keep his family together, but there must be more to it than that. We only see his mother--is he trying not to be an absentee father, no matter what the cost? His mother also seems like him in that she wants to avoid confrontation. Is that why he thinks that's how you behave in a relationship? Almost everything about Amber gets on my last nerve, including her incredibly whiny, grating voice. I think it's a good idea for her to get rid of some of her hostility and stress somehow, but I don't know that martial arts fighting is such a good idea for her. It doesn't so much seem to be a way for her to reduce her stress as learn new skills through which to take it out on others, Gary, in particular. She's threatened to hit him on several occasions, and in the previews, they showed her actually punching him in the ear. His reaction--to grab Leah and take off--I can kind of understand. It's exactly what a lot of women would do if the men in their lives hit them like that. The problem is, like a lot of abused women, he keeps going back and taking more abuse. And yeah, I totally agree that someone needs to step in and get Leah to a safe situation until her parents are capable of taking care of her properly. Amber's already yelling at Leah, and she seems to expect more of her than a child that age is likely to be able to give her consistently. Kids Leah's age (heck, kids any age) may know they're not supposed to do something, but that doesn't mean that in the heat of the moment, they're always going to remember that and do the appropriate thing. Amber's also admitted to slapping Leah's hands to teach her not to do something. She has so little control over her temper, I think it's entirely possible that some day, that slap on the hands might escalate to something worse before Amber is able to stop herself--or that Leah will end up hurting herself because her parents are too busy arguing with each other to notice what she's doing. Or she'll simply end up with some kind of stress-induced illness, because she's too little to handle all the constant upheaval in her life. Unfortunately, Gary isn't really a reasonable custodian for Leah either, since he seems so unwilling to do much of anything other than lie around on a couch all day. When I think of Leah, and then think of Carly, I think how much more fortunate the latter is than the former.
    I agree with much of what you say. Marci's father actually said he wanted to know why Kyle couldn't move closer as that was a warning bell to him but neither Maci nor Kyle answered that question. To me what Maci is doing is immature in that the only reason she is moving is to be close to a boy. She also displayed immature behavior when she waited until after the fact to tell her parents she had already made plans to move-and despite the fact Ryan is not parent material at the moment that doesn't give Maci the right to just take Bentley and move him away from all the other people who are his `family', which includes his grandparents on both sides. Plus, it's my understanding Ryan's parents are helping out financially so how can you on one hand take their money but then on the other take away Bentley's right to see them and vice versa. What happens if the relationship with Kyle doesn't work out- it's not as if they are engaged-she's taking a huge gamble. I know she told the school she will be attending that she is transferring there because her boyfriend is attending. Is that really a good reason to uproot your child, because you want to follow your boyfriend? I just don't think she's making smart choices -part of me wonders if she can't imagine her life without a guy in it? It's just that Kyle has never had a girlfriend before and he might not necessarily be someone Maci would choose if she didn't already know him. he's a safe choice right now, but is he the correct one? I'm not personally attacking her I'm just not sure running off and leaving behind an extended network of support is wise.
    As for Ryan- whose to say he isn't going to change, evolve? Their breakup seems more like a break up between a married couple-there's so much bitterness between them and it's not only Ryan, but Maci, as well- I feel part of the reason she is moving is to get back at her ex-and no matter what Ryan said to her, telling him she can withhold Bentley from him sounded really bad. At the end of the day a child doesn't need to be used as a tool to get back at the other person. I think there is a bit of an undercurrent in this situation. There needs to be a legal agreement and there needs to be an understanding that no matter how much you loathe one another you have to put all of that aside for the sake of the child- you can never let that child feel on any level the tension and the animosity between he parents. You shouldn't deny your child the chance to have a relationship with your exes family, especially if those family members are loving and caring (which appears to be the case here regarding Ryan's parents). That's why I applaud people like you, who decide the child always always comes first and must never hear one parent degrade the other, no matter how bitter or hurtful the relationship has been for one or both of the parents.
    " I have a simple outlook-leave every person I meet with a smile on their face."-Donny

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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    If I am not mistaken, Ryan did not want anythng to do with Bentley for the first year of his life. He had to be taken to court to pay anything for his son. This guy gets no sympathy from me for after that long finally coming around. Maci has been nothing but cooperative after all that, and for once she is thinking about herself. Perhaps it is not just Kyle she moved for, but some independence and the ability to make her own decisions. Her parents and Ryan's parents seem nice, but they also seem to be pushy with their opinions. Ultimately Ryan and her are the ones that matter, and Ryan has proven he does not consider her feelings so her not taking his into consideration is fine for now. Bentley living an hour away from his father is not that huge of a distance as long as she keeps to the custody arrangements they have made, and it seems she is going to. If she is willing to drive him back and forth, than what is the problem? Plus why is she always the one driving him? I think Ryan only has driven him one time when he had his girlfriend the first time. Not much can be said about his priority if he cannot even be bothered to drive over and pick his son up.

  6. #746
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    ITA w your post. i don't get why everyone is acting like she's moving to cali or something. she's moving 2 hrs away. everyone will still be able to see bentley and be a part of his life.

    Quote Originally Posted by MHcarrollton;4067342;
    If I am not mistaken, Ryan did not want anythng to do with Bentley for the first year of his life. He had to be taken to court to pay anything for his son. This guy gets no sympathy from me for after that long finally coming around. Maci has been nothing but cooperative after all that, and for once she is thinking about herself. Perhaps it is not just Kyle she moved for, but some independence and the ability to make her own decisions. Her parents and Ryan's parents seem nice, but they also seem to be pushy with their opinions. Ultimately Ryan and her are the ones that matter, and Ryan has proven he does not consider her feelings so her not taking his into consideration is fine for now. Bentley living an hour away from his father is not that huge of a distance as long as she keeps to the custody arrangements they have made, and it seems she is going to. If she is willing to drive him back and forth, than what is the problem? Plus why is she always the one driving him? I think Ryan only has driven him one time when he had his girlfriend the first time. Not much can be said about his priority if he cannot even be bothered to drive over and pick his son up.

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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Macy needs to seek legal advice instead of just doing what she thinks seems right. Custody cases can cost over $20,000. Much of what she has said and done may hurt her in court. Why in the world she wouldn't get an attorney is beyond me. It's like she's trying to sabotage herself.

    I'm afraid the legal advice the attorney gave April and Caitlyne about Butch was not actually correct. He said they should go to court and have a trial on the accusations of what happened at the house that night and that Butch would win because she couldn't remember what happened. Well, the charge Butch is being held on is Violating the Protective Order, not Assault. Once the protective order is entered, you can't violate it and you can't go in and argue as a defense that the protective order should never have been entered int the first place. A violation of the protective order is a criminal offense. So, I guess it's a good thing they didn't retain him. I don't think he fullly understood the issues. Also, April could end up getting her goose cooked too. She sent all those letters out admitting that she lied to the police. They could charge her with filing a false police report or malicious prosecution. Wouldn't that be funny? Actually, it might help her.

    I pray that Caitlyn gets away from her mother. She needs to cut all ties, That woman is toxic and will drag her down. That young child needs to be taken out of the home too. April and Butch are not fit to raise a child. This stuff is going on on national tv. Where is child protective services?

    I can say the same about Amber. Did you see her punching Gary in the face in the previews? Does someone have to end up dead for law enforcement to intervene here. Leah is in danger and is being emotionally scarred on a daily basis in that home. Gary has lost his mind. He is not dealing with reality. If they stay together one of them is going to end up dead. I hate to see this happen while everyone sits and watches them fight for entertainment. It's really disgusting. I am going to complain to MTV about it and try to get Dr. Drew to intervene.

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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70;4067449;
    Macy needs to seek legal advice instead of just doing what she thinks seems right. Custody cases can cost over $20,000. Much of what she has said and done may hurt her in court. Why in the world she wouldn't get an attorney is beyond me. It's like she's trying to sabotage herself. I'm afraid the legal advice the attorney gave April and Caitlyne about Butch was not actually correct. He said they should go to court and have a trial on the accusations of what happened at the house that night and that Butch would win because she couldn't remember what happened. Well, the charge Butch is being held on is Violating the Protective Order, not Assault. Once the protective order is entered, you can't violate it and you can't go in and argue as a defense that the protective order should never have been entered int the first place. A violation of the protective order is a criminal offense. So, I guess it's a good thing they didn't retain him. I don't think he fullly understood the issues. Also, April could end up getting her goose cooked too. She sent all those letters out admitting that she lied to the police. They could charge her with filing a false police report or malicious prosecution. Wouldn't that be funny? Actually, it might help her. I pray that Caitlyn gets away from her mother. She needs to cut all ties, That woman is toxic and will drag her down. That young child needs to be taken out of the home too. April and Butch are not fit to raise a child. This stuff is going on on national tv. Where is child protective services? I can say the same about Amber. Did you see her punching Gary in the face in the previews? Does someone have to end up dead for law enforcement to intervene here. Leah is in danger and is being emotionally scarred on a daily basis in that home. Gary has lost his mind. He is not dealing with reality. If they stay together one of them is going to end up dead. I hate to see this happen while everyone sits and watches them fight for entertainment. It's really disgusting. I am going to complain to MTV about it and try to get Dr. Drew to intervene.
    I'm glad you explained the legal situation for April/Butch, because I thought it all sounded too simple to be true. For that matter, I couldn't figure out why, if Butch needed a lawyer, and he truly couldn't afford it, he couldn't get pro bono legal help from somewhere. Or am I just being really naive about that? I agree that Caitlyn needs to get away from her mother, but as I said elsewhere, since she's not yet out of high school, that may be difficult for her. Once she graduates, I would imagine that she'll either start working or go on to some kind of further schooling and probably will leave. I also worry about Nicholas, Caitlyn's little brother, who seems to have such a sunny personality, despite the environment in which he's living. If Caitlyn moves out, he'll be left alone with April, and that, I fear, could be a real problem. Heck, I even worry about the dogs in that household, because I don't see them as being in a good situation either. I think Macy's attitude is simply showing her youth. She seems so mature much of the time that we tend to forget that she's still a teenager, and teenagers in love often make hasty decisions without thinking about the long term ramifications. Ryan and Macy need to have a custody agreement worked out legally, because what they've been doing is no longer working. Even if Ryan didn't get involved with Bentley until after he was a year old, he is involved now, and she can't expect to push him back out of Bentley's life without Ryan raising a fuss. Personally, I think at least a part of it is male pride on Ryan's part--he doesn't want Bentley thinking of any other guy as daddy, even if he hasn't been much of a father himself. Ryan may be a huge pain in Macy's butt, but he's also Bentley's father and up until now, she's been okay with Bentley having a relationship with him, so she's stuck. I also wish that Ryan and Macy could have had that last argument without Bentley present, because, while I'm sure he didn't understand what was going on, he was obviously catching on that it was a stressful situation and reacted to that. I can't speak for anyone else, but I don't watch Amber and Gary for entertainment so much as in the hopes that somehow one or the other of them will wake up, and Leah's life and theirs will improve. I jokingly told someone that I check in every week to make sure all the kids are still okay, but really, that's not so much of a joke. I really do want to see Amber and Gary wake up (or be woken up) and Farrah realize that she has to parent Sophia better and Macy work things out legally with Ryan. I want to see Caitlyn and Tyler make it too, since they've already come so far. Heck, I'd like to see April and Butch get their lives together too, but I see less chance of that.

  9. #749
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70;4067449;
    I'm afraid the legal advice the attorney gave April and Caitlyne about Butch was not actually correct. He said they should go to court and have a trial on the accusations of what happened at the house that night and that Butch would win because she couldn't remember what happened. Well, the charge Butch is being held on is Violating the Protective Order, not Assault. Once the protective order is entered, you can't violate it and you can't go in and argue as a defense that the protective order should never have been entered int the first place. A violation of the protective order is a criminal offense. So, I guess it's a good thing they didn't retain him. I don't think he fullly understood the issues. Also, April could end up getting her goose cooked too. She sent all those letters out admitting that she lied to the police. They could charge her with filing a false police report or malicious prosecution. Wouldn't that be funny? Actually, it might help her.
    I think we need to remember that we only see a small portion of what goes on in those consultations. I don't understand what you mean when you say a protective order cannot be violated. Any court order can be violated - whether civil or criminal. I wonder if the attorney tried to explain to April what would/should actually happen, and she just didn't understand. Your comment seems rather detailed, and I'm not sure April would be able to understand all of it. There is most likely much more going on between them that we don't see. It's also possible the attorney is suggesting an option to ensure April gets the help she obviously needs. However, we will probably never know.

    I am not excusing April in any way, however. She's a tweaker with a serious problem. She should not have custody of that toddler, in my opinion. I also don't understand why Caitlyn hasn't just walked away from her. She would be so much better off if she had.

    That whole situation is impossible for me to grasp. And so very sad.

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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70;4067449;
    Macy needs to seek legal advice instead of just doing what she thinks seems right. Custody cases can cost over $20,000. Much of what she has said and done may hurt her in court. Why in the world she wouldn't get an attorney is beyond me. It's like she's trying to sabotage herself.

    I'm afraid the legal advice the attorney gave April and Caitlyne about Butch was not actually correct. He said they should go to court and have a trial on the accusations of what happened at the house that night and that Butch would win because she couldn't remember what happened. Well, the charge Butch is being held on is Violating the Protective Order, not Assault. Once the protective order is entered, you can't violate it and you can't go in and argue as a defense that the protective order should never have been entered int the first place. A violation of the protective order is a criminal offense. So, I guess it's a good thing they didn't retain him. I don't think he fully understood the issues. Also, April could end up getting her goose cooked too. She sent all those letters out admitting that she lied to the police. They could charge her with filing a false police report or malicious prosecution. Wouldn't that be funny? Actually, it might help her.

    I pray that Caitlyn gets away from her mother. She needs to cut all ties, That woman is toxic and will drag her down. That young child needs to be taken out of the home too. April and Butch are not fit to raise a child. This stuff is going on on national tv. Where is child protective services?

    I can say the same about Amber. Did you see her punching Gary in the face in the previews? Does someone have to end up dead for law enforcement to intervene here. Leah is in danger and is being emotionally scarred on a daily basis in that home. Gary has lost his mind. He is not dealing with reality. If they stay together one of them is going to end up dead. I hate to see this happen while everyone sits and watches them fight for entertainment. It's really disgusting. I am going to complain to MTV about it and try to get Dr. Drew to intervene.
    Great explanation about the legal situation regarding April and Butch.

    I have another question though: Why isn't April being brought to court for violating the protective order? She accepted the call from Butch . Doesn't a restraining order state that there be no contact between either party and if one party contacts the other then said party will be arrested? Or both parties?

    I think of all the women and men who are truly being victimized, stalked and threatened by abusive partners, who are genuinely in harms way and then I think about people like April who abuse this law. Too many people use this law to exact revenge. Butch is no prize, but isn't he in jail based on breaking a protective order which was granted based on a lie? So, why isn't April being held accountable for making false accusations?

    When something questionable like this is caught on tape complete with full confession why doesn't law enforcement look into it and do something?

    The abuse Amber is doling out to Leah and Gary is right there on tape for the whole world to see. Why isn't there any legal intervention?
    " I have a simple outlook-leave every person I meet with a smile on their face."-Donny

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