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Thread: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

  1. #691
    FORT Fogey momrek06's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70;4058413;
    I have been observing Caitlyn's mom's behavior and mannerisms. It looks very off if you know what I mean. I have no proof, so I can't accuse her of doing anything other than being verbally abusive, but check out her sunken in face and eyes. She looks strung out most of the time. And why do you think she is so upset that her boyfriend is in the rehab? I suspect he provides her with more than rent money and that is why she is climbing the walls.

    I also suspect that her mother was horribly abused by parents, siblings or husbands. I think it is likely that she was treated the same way she is treating Caitlyn. I know it doesn't make sense, but it often works that way. She does know better, she just choses to stay that way. Honestly, I don't know if she would really care if Caitlyn walked away and never saw her again. She's just that cold.
    Hiya, Debb, great post and ITA w/you.

    April must have had a very dysfuntional upbringing. I really think she is horribly depressed. She needs medication. To go through life so miserable all the time is just so sad. As you said her appearance is so lacking. She is not a healthy person and I do not think I have seen her w/o a cigarette in her hands since the show started.

    I do applaud Catelynn, she seems to try so hard to be a good kid and I also applaud her for giving Carly up so she would not have to be a part of the mess of a life that Catelynn has to deal with DAILY. Catelynn never seems to be the root of April's anger yet April continues to yell at her all of the time. It is absolutely disturbing to watch.

    I wish Dr. Drew would weigh in on April and make some recommendations like THERAPY and/or medication for April.
    KAREN

  2. #692
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by tears.and.rain;4056043;
    Yeah.... what's your point? Sole custody involves courts too... Court, in and of itself, isn't the problem.
    I don't know what your firsthand experiences with joint vs. sole custody have been, but I do know what mine have been. It's not about whether or not court is a problem. It's about parental attitudes getting in the way of a smooth life for the child....as smooth as it can be, anyway.

    So many marriages/relationships don't end amicably and, in an attempt to jerk another parent around, it's not unheard of for one parent to try to make a move just to get back at the other parent, with the child being caught in the midde. I could see Amber and Gary caught up in this dilemma, as well as Ryan and Maci....just out of spite. The immaturity is also a huge factor. It's not just enough to have a clear settup; you need a clear AND legal, court-backed settup. If you are dealing with an emotional partner, it's better to have everything spelled out in black and white. Like child support, visitation, etc. The child benefits when it's not being used as a prize in a tug-of-war contest....which I think makes the better argument for sole custody by a reasonable and prudent parent. This does not necessarily cut down on the non-custodial parent's involvement; I would hope it just encourages reasonability. This kind of case can always be reopened, if one of the parents thinks it necessary.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  3. #693
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    I agree with you absolutely, and I don't know what kind of experience has shown you that a child is MORE likely to be used as a prize in a tug-of-war game when there's a clearly spelled out joint custody agreement than when one parent has all the control, but that's NEVER how I've seen it go down. Sole custody, by its very nature, gives ONE parent all the parental rights. That's why it's called "sole" custody. Because the parent who has that custody has all the control, and if the other parent wants to have some rights they have to go back into court every time. What makes you think that in a joint-custody situation, visitation and child support, etc. aren't spelled out?

    Joint custody doesn't actually mean that the child(ren) have to be with both parents equally, just that both parents have equal rights in terms of their child(ren). So, a child may see each parent for the same amount of time in a joint-custody agreement as they would in a sole custody agreement, such as every other weekend or however it works out. Child support would still be paid. But visitation is just that - visitation. And in a sole-custody agreement, it's MUCH easier to jerk the other parent around in terms of that.

  4. #694
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Joint Custody or joint decision making authority is designed for parents who can work together in a cooperative manner. It is not a good plan for parents who are immature, selfish, and demanding.

  5. #695
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    her mom def shows all the signs of cocaine abuse.

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70;4058413;
    I have been observing Caitlyn's mom's behavior and mannerisms. It looks very off if you know what I mean. I have no proof, so I can't accuse her of doing anything other than being verbally abusive, but check out her sunken in face and eyes. She looks strung out most of the time. And why do you think she is so upset that her boyfriend is in the rehab? I suspect he provides her with more than rent money and that is why she is climbing the walls.

    I also suspect that her mother was horribly abused by parents, siblings or husbands. I think it is likely that she was treated the same way she is treating Caitlyn. I know it doesn't make sense, but it often works that way. She does know better, she just choses to stay that way. Honestly, I don't know if she would really care if Caitlyn walked away and never saw her again. She's just that cold.

  6. #696
    FORT Fogey redsox girl's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    my understanding about the joint custody filing is so maci can't take off with the child, which is exactly what she is planning to do at this point. Maci didn't even have the maturity to tell Ryan she was moving-she copped to it when Ryan told her he was taking her to court. Until that point I thought they didn't have any sort of legal agreement. So, maybe at the ende of the day Ryan doesn't get joint custody but maybe that isn't the point so much as legally preventing maci from taking their child where ever she feels like it (which at this point seems to be based on following a boyfriend).
    " I have a simple outlook-leave every person I meet with a smile on their face."-Donny

  7. #697
    FORT Fogey redsox girl's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Catelyn and Tyler are such wise mature young people, comparitively speaking and I hope their story gives courage to others and edcuates preganat kids that keeping a baby is not always the most loving thing you can do in fact it can be selfish and destructive in some circumstances. .Catelyn and Tyler get it, that sometimes giving your child up for adoption is the most loving thing you cand do- it is a sign of true parental love. They have also chosen to break the cycle of abuse in both of their families. I cannot believe how strong both kids are despite having parents like Butch and Catelyn's mom.
    I fear for some of these babies who are in households and situations in which they are being used as rewards and legal footballs, not to mention being raised in incredibly negative, argumentative and even violent households. What kind of life is that? It certainly doesn't seem to include much love, patience and positive modeling behavior.
    " I have a simple outlook-leave every person I meet with a smile on their face."-Donny

  8. #698
    FORT Fogey redsox girl's Avatar
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Did anyone else notice Maci driving her car without her hands on the wheel- she was on the cellphone crying(nothing like blurred vison while driving down the road) while taking her other hand off the wheel. It takes a milisecond of distraction to wind up in a life ending car accident-and there's Bentley in the back seat. Shouldn't she have pulled over in order to compose herself? Used the cellphone while pulled over?
    " I have a simple outlook-leave every person I meet with a smile on their face."-Donny

  9. #699
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Quote Originally Posted by redsox girl;4060220;
    Did anyone else notice Maci driving her car without her hands on the wheel- she was on the cellphone crying(nothing like blurred vison while driving down the road) while taking her other hand off the wheel. It takes a milisecond of distraction to wind up in a life ending car accident-and there's Bentley in the back seat. Shouldn't she have pulled over in order to compose herself? Used the cellphone while pulled over?
    Yes. I bet she has heard from thousands of people about it. It was very shocking. I would have thought she knew better. I don't care how upset you are, it doesn't make sense. It could be used against her in court.

    I also think allowing Bentley to walk around that dirt bike area unprotected is unsafe too. He is small and could toddle into the path of someone on a dirt bike. They showed him sitting on the dirt bike without a helmet, I hope they didn't allow him to ride that way too. I think they all need a safety class.

  10. #700
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    Re: MTV's 16 and Pregnant

    Amber really bugs the hell out of me. She needs to take some parenting and anger management classes. Gary asked her a simple question, not to curse in front of Leah, and she gets all pissed off. Then when she's telling her friend the story, she say's Gary makes her curse. WHATEVER! You just have a limited vocabulary and can't find better ways to express yourself.

    Ugh and Farrah, getting all pissed off at her parents because the car brokedown. Seriously she acts as though they planned that. Then she gets all annoyed at the zoo because her mother won't stop talking (to Sophia mostly)

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