Oh good lord... those two? I'm so relieved to discover the two who appeared to have the fewest possible redeeming qualities filled the role of the two least likely to be able to form the cognitive abilities to recognize physical symbols arranged on a page as representative of abstract thought.
Never ever ever ever date a person who doesn't read. You can consider drunken hookups with them, but only if you are willing to chew off your own arm to escape.
Did we get a chance to see what this poor novel was? Man, do I wish I'd Tivod that moment... that's pure schadenfruede beatitude!