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Thread: 7/5 recap: "Truth in Advertising--The Title Says it All"

  1. #11
    Shark Week! dagwood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spegs
    Maybe it’s anthrax. Maybe it’s the speedo Preston will wear when he greats them on the circular rug of destiny.
    ----------
    PJ: “I could reach out to my family, give them everything I’ve wanted to…I could buy world peace and give lollipops to babies…” I’m too distracted by PJ’s strange brown shirt with fuzzy loopies on the collar to pay attention to the rest of her Miss America speech.
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    Deep Thoughts with Sherlock Holmes
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    Yes, you thought the finale elimination would be tomorrow night, but you only have until…dum dum dum…tomorrow, late afternoon!! Mwuhahahaha!


    Great job, Spegs!
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    Maybe we should chug on over to namby pamby land where we can find some self confidence for you, you jackwagon!

  2. #12
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    Loved your recap!!
    The recap was so much better than the actual show.
    When are they going to put you on a show that deserves your talent?
    I was laughing the whole way through!

    Keep up the good work.

  3. #13
    FORT Newbie RubyStar's Avatar
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    Quotes:

    The girls are summoned to the “event” room. Which I would call, “the room wherein lame twists are announced.”

    Rachel is upset that Preston will have the power in the end. I’m thinking, not if you choose the cash, honey.

    Sorry, we spent your budget on FLOM 2

    [Dumpsville. Population: Rachel

    Preston wonders aloud if chemistry translates to long term commitment. Then he admits he might be making a mistake—

    “I think you are!” Rachel inserts. If looks could maim and disfigure…

    Arch enemies will whine about each other. A lot. Fifteen men will choose who stays. Twists galore will hover above us like stealth bombers, waiting to drop their load of shock and awe!!


    Great recap for someone that had not been watching the show! FLOM 4 is going to be a wild ride with lots of fights!

  4. #14
    Kaysar & Erika Fan Sarahgirl's Avatar
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    I really enjoyed the recap Spegs! All my favoriate quotes were already used. You left me laughing out loud so many times. Great job!

  5. #15
    Evil Slash Crazy Miss Filangi's Avatar
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    Great job Spegs!
    In the portrait room where Jordan is waiting, all the women’s pictures are lit again. Jordan points out these sixteen portraits, commenting on Preston’s monumental decision. As he speaks, the lights on fourteen portraits suddenly black out. Jordan looks pleased, and I wonder how many takes it took to get the switch-guy’s timing right.
    If you go through a lot of hammers each month, I don't think it necessarily means you're a hard worker.
    It may just mean that you have a lot to learn about proper hammer maintenance.


  6. #16
    eternal optimist Shazzer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spegs
    Hey, Stupid! Yeah, I mean you.

    Maybe it’s the speedo Preston will wear when he greats them on the circular rug of destiny.

    This is the first FLOM episode I’ve watched this season, but I’m already so nauseated by the constant “Love or Money? Love or Money? Polly want a cracker!” repetition that I’m ready to order my Tivo to destroy all evidence that this show ever marred its pristine memory banks without watching to the end. Seriously. The question is in the TITLE. This show is calling me stupid, to my face. I don’t know how you faithful little soldiers endure this every week—but I salute you!

    I’m kind of sick to my stomach, too, but that has more to do with Jordan’s never-ending, failed attempts at drama.

    Jordan leaves Preston “to his thoughts,” and I think that’s assuming a lot.

    Very loving and sincere, Preston. Not to mention specific—the girls seem fairly exchangeable to our lovesick hero at this juncture.

    (And if I open the mayonnaise, it will be open. And if I turn off the TV now, it will be off.)

    Purple, the color of memories. My memories, too, Preston. Mine, too.

    PJ comforts herself that this day has to come to an end. I comfort myself with the same thought.

    Lots of purply flashbacks ensue, and I’m glad they use the purple. I might have been confused, wondering where they kept the beach set and the snow set in the mansion, if they had shown these memories in color.

    I think Rachel must have been the one giving advice, because PJ ends up in a black dress with a ragged, shredded hemline that reminds me of a Halloween costume I once made for myself out of garbage bags.

    I’m feeling really bad for these parents whose son is a stranger to them.

    Then PJ is suddenly black and white (not purple and white—this is important! She is not a memory. She is frozen. Or dead. But not a flashback.)

    Dumpsville. Population: Rachel

    *Knock knock* Hello? This is Foreshadowing.

    By the pricking of my thumbs…

    Twists galore will hover above us like stealth bombers, waiting to drop their load of shock and awe!!

    And I find myself wishing desperately for that one ring of power, PJ’s ring, because then you would all have to love my recap. Yes, all would love me…and despair!!

    In the immortal words of the ever expressive Preston: “Thanks.”
    Spegs!!! Right out of the gate, pure gold!! I'm...in...awe. It's said all the time, but it's still always true, this whole thing was so quotable!! And unlike Wayner, I am heartless in my desire to not leave things for others to quote. Buwahahaha!! I'm ferreting out nearly 90 percent of this recap!! Okay, not really, I looked above and had nearly all of it tightly wedged in there. Practically every other sentence. So I trimmed. But know that it was line for line amazing. *shakes head in bewilderment* There will ALWAYS be something left for others to quote. Wow.

    Great job, spegs. Really, really, wonderful. Two thumbs way up!!
    "If you're like me, you have a 'been there, done that' attitude when it comes to paleolithic paleontology." - Jon Stewart

    "I swear, you are the ho-ho ho." - OTS

  7. #17
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    Bravo! If only the show had been this entertaining!

  8. #18
    FORT Fogey Add It Up Champion famita's Avatar
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    I can't believe this was your first time!!!! Stupendously better than watching the show!!! 3 thumbs up (I'm a mutant)!!!!!!

  9. #19
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    I DID love your recap. Yes, I do love you…and despair!!
    Amazingly accomplished for a "virgin!" Looking forward to many more...

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