This week the men are sleeping when Jordan arrives. After wishing them a good morning, Jordan announces that today Erin will go on four dates.
Jordan produces four cell phones and explains that in a half hour, Erin will make the first of four calls, and invite one of the men on a date. Jordan says Erin will make similar calls at 11, 2 and 6.
NBC misses yet another opportunity for integrated advertising by not placing calls at Dr. Pepper hours. (Frankly, I don’t know why my mind works this way.)
The catch being that Erin can choose to continue a date into the next segment or for the entire day if she wishes.
This call could be worth
One Million Dollars
Eric, having realized his gross faux pas during the last elimination ceremony, says he needs one on one time with Erin more now than ever.
In case you missed it, the spirit of Eddie Haskell overtook Eric’s mouth last week as he told Erin that while others may have sold their soul, “of course I refused the cash.” Eric now wants to explain and apologize to Erin.
Wade also wants this date ‘real bad,’ figuring that the first guy selected could ‘run the table’ and manage to monopolize all four dates.
The Telltale Heart
The first call is to Chad, who joins Erin in the limo. They leave behind Eric, who looks pained at the prospect, for an ice skating date in Pasadena. As Erin puts on goalie equipment, Chad helps her dress and manages to cop a feel in the process. Erin terms this ‘cute,’ much in the same way as when a schoolboy pulls pigtails.
As Erin plays goalie, Chad tries to shoot pucks into the goal. Later they have coffee and pastries at a table set up within the rink.
Erin says she is very comfortable with Chad. “I feel like we are a couple.” However, she is not sure if his motives are pure. As they gaze into one another’s eyes, Erin says, “I’m calling my next date,” and asks Chad if he has any advice.
Meanwhile, as the eleven o clock hour draws near, Wade, Greg and Eric sit in a row on the sofa watching and waiting for their cell phones to ring. Eric proclaims this waiting combined with the ticking of the clock to be just like the Telltale Heart.
See No Evil, Speak No Evil, and Hear No Evil
After much dramatic music and an overly long commercial break, we return to the sound of a ringing phone. Erin calls Chad for the second date. Erin explains her choice by saying that Chad is too smart – and that she needs him to trust her.
The next date takes them to the Pasadena Arboretum where each speak of ‘the secret’ often in their confessionals. They each make a wish at a wishing well. Quaintly, each wish they could divulge their million dollar secret.
After lounging about comfortably barefoot and sipping wine, Erin makes her third call of the day. At 2 p.m. three men line up on the couch looking like bad pottery. Each proclaim to need the date badly. Eric, in particular, looks miserable and says this waiting is, “The worst thing in the world.”
As Wade takes the next call, Eric looks as though he may break into tears at this third rejection of the day. Sure Eric, it was all fun and games when you got the solo date last week which ended up in the spa. You were hardly humble when you puffed out your chest and announced it to be the ‘best date ever.’
Obviously in mourning over his loss (love or money, you decide) Eric goes back to bed.
Greg, looking great in black, tries to make the best of a bad situation by staying dressed and active. He asks Eric if he wants to shoot a little pool.
“No,” Eric replies pitifully. “I just don’t feel well.”
What About Wade?
Meanwhile, Wade and Erin arrive at the Conga Room and go upstairs for salsa dancing. Wade is determined to show Erin an edgier, more aggressive personality tonight. As they talk, Wade tells Erin she is lucky to have three great guys to choose from. Erin laughs at this, perhaps understanding his real meaning, since the remaining men consider Eric the odd man out.
As the clock hands near six, Greg is loosing patience. Eric thinks Erin made an overt decision not to choose him for a date, based only on his comments at the previous elimination ceremony.
At five minutes to six Chad, Greg and Eric are shown waiting by the phone again. In the deafening silence of 6:02, Eric is ticked and Greg is disappointed. By now, Greg is the only one of the remaining men that hasn’t had one-on-one time with Erin.
On the limo ride to the day’s fourth date at a Moroccan restaurant, Wade finally goes in for a kiss. After dinner, a Henna tattoo artist arrives and allows Wade to pick a design. Wade chooses the symbol for “Be Honest, Be True” and has this tattooed on his arm, while Erin’s is placed on her ankle.
In confessionals, Wade says he has fallen for Erin. Which may explain the Don King hairstyle, or the use of questionable hair products. Wade says he has fallen for Erin and keeping the secret is hard. In her own confessionals, Erin states that Wade is her best chance for the $2 million.
Deep, Dark Depression, Excessive Misery
The next morning Greg, Wade and Chad lift weights. Eric is presumably still in bed, lost in a deep, dark depression. Wade and Chad attempt to cheer Greg up by confessing that they have ‘talked up’ Greg (and talked down Eric) on their individual dates with Erin. Wade thinks there is a good chance this group will be the final three.
That evening, as they dress for the elimination ceremony, Mr. Obvious arrives to tell them they will get a chance to speak with Erin before elimination in a fireside chat.
Now is the time to make
One last play
For her heart
One million dollars
Is at stake gentlemen
Chad meets with Erin first. After indulging in some brief mutual admiration, they part, with Erin saying privately she doesn’t know if Chad would ultimately pick her.
Wade is next and tells Erin he has had the most fun, and he senses a connection between them. With his knuckles still swollen from the wrestling brawl in an earlier episode, Wade tells her she can’t ask for the ring back tonight, because he couldn’t possibly remove it yet. This week Erin says she is more comfortable with Wade than the other guys.
As Greg sits down for the fireside chat he pointedly tells Erin that he had forgotten what she looked like. Erin explains that she didn’t call him for the last date because she was tired. Greg says he would like to have an opportunity to get to know her better. Later, Erin comments that Greg has the character required to pick the person over the money.
Finally Eric gets to sit down for his long awaited chance to speak with Erin. Seeming to have rebounded from his depressive episode, Eric seems positive and upbeat. He confessed that he said things in the elimination ceremony that he regretted. He realized that his words may have come across as contrived. Eric tells Erin that he really cares for her.
Erin thinks Eric seemed nervous and questions his sincerity and his feelings for her. She speculates that Eric is determined to win at all costs and says she can’t trust anyone – nor can anyone trust her.
The Most Dramatic Elimination Ceremony … EVER!
For tonight’s elimination, Erin is wearing some clownish pink and white silk top thing that defies polite description.
Chad: I was so excited to call you first yesterday, and I am excited to see you tonight. Our date was so wonderful. I would be flattered if you would stay.
Wade: Once again, I had such an incredible time with you. It was nice to see a more playful side of you. The way you are makes a girl feel so special. I’d like you to stay.
Eric: By now Eric looks pasty white and I’m thinking smelling salts are in order. Looking distressed, Erin begins a long and stumbling soliloquy: I feel like you haven’t been yourself lately. Even tonight. I appreciate you letting me know where you were coming from.
Erin squinches up her face repeatedly as she speaks, while Eric visibly squinches up body parts from his teeth to his toes. To prolong our suspense, we are granted yet another commercial break and return to hear ‘the rest of the story.’
I don’t know … I guess .. you don’t have to try so hard. I want you to stay and keep the ring.
Eric is thrilled by this, and acts as if he is a puppy that has just been swatted by a newspaper, as he vows to shape up.
Greg: (long pause) You and I have had some very candid conversations. Unfortunately, I’ve felt like it’s been hard four you to open up. When Greg interrupts to point out, “that’s hard to do without a date,” she gets a look in her eye that tells me this serf has just committed a high crime against Her Highness Erin and may be beheaded. Really, it was an evil eye. Anyway,
As the elimination ceremony ends, the dramatic music rises to a crescendo and Mr. Obvious appears by Erin’s side:
Standing before you are three men
You have chosen from fifteen
Now I’m going to make your choice
(Jordan takes out a box containing a single silver ring)
Someone who once held a place in your heart
Is joining these men the house
Please welcome a man from your past
And with this, cheesy, smarmy Rob Campos, the dopey, groping attorney from For Love or Money, appears in his white tux on the stairway. Causing a look of confusion for the other men, and one of pure disdain from Erin.
Next week on For Love or Money 2: Rob is back. Does he seek revenge or did he come back to win Erin’s heart?
For questions or comments about this recap, feel free to contact the author: Bumpkin@fansofrealitytv.com