LOL! He used that all the time when he was playing "The Liar" on Saturday Night Live.Originally Posted by dfleming2
Hello, my name is Tommy Flanagan, and I'm a member of Pathological Liars Anonymous. In fact,I'm the president of the organization. I didn't always lie. No, when I was a kid, I told the truth. But then one day I got caught stealing money out of my mother's purse. I lied. I told her it was homework - that my teacher told me to do it. And she got fired. Yeah, that's what happened. After that, lying was easy for me.
I lied about my age and joined the army. I was thirteen at the time. Yeah, I went to Vietnam and I was injured catching a motar shell in my teeth. And they made me a three-star general. And then I got a job in journalism, writing for the National Enquire- er, Geographic; yeah, I was making twenty thousand a y- Month. In fact, I won the Pulitzer Prize that year. Yeah, that's the ticket.
And then my cousin died, Joe Louis, and I took it hard. Maybe too hard - I tried to kill myself. Yeah, I did kill myself. Sure, I was medically dead for a week and a half. It was a woman that brought me out of it - Indira Gandhi. Yeah, right, and she told me about Pathological Liars Anonymous. Oh, you'd be surprised how many famous people belong. In fact, at one of the meetings I met my wife, Morgan Fairchild. Yes, I'm a changed man now, and all because of Pathological Liars Anonymous. Why, I - I even have my picture on the cover of Newsweek magazine. Yeah, every day. Yeah, that's the ticket.