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Thread: The Vegas Finals: Gorgeous Vegas Babes

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    It ain't easy being green Wayner's Avatar
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    The Vegas Finals: Gorgeous Vegas Babes

    You've Been Duped
    Okay, I admit it. This weekís show took place in Las Vegas, but there were no Gorgeous Vegas Babes. Well, unless you watched the commercials for the new James Caan series that NBC is promoting Ė there were plenty of GVB's there. I only threw that into the title because sex sells. If you donít believe me, go see how many hits the latest recap of For Love or Money has racked up this week. But before you do that, why donít you stick around and find out what happened on Last Comic Standing? Humor me.

    This weekís show starts with a quick recap of last week's shows, then we meet this weekís Celebrity Talent Scouts. John Witherspoon is probably most recognized from his work with the Wayans brothers. Talk Soupís Aisha Tyler and Victoria Jackson of SNL fame are also on the panel. Comedy legend Phyllis Diller rounds out the group.

    The Comedians
    First up this week is Tess. Last week Tess poked fun at her weight. This week, Tess, um, poked fun at her weight again. Good to see that the first of our twenty finalists has such range. I admit that sheís polished on stage, and sheís amusing. But just like last week, she doesnít knock me over. Which means sheíll probably advance.

    Russ Maneve is up next. Russ tells us that he has a problem with premature ejaculation, but it saves him a fortune in phone sex bills. His next joke makes that first one sound clean and sophisticated. Iím disappointed, because his unprovoked shark attack bit in the East Coast Semiís cracked me up, but this week he just grossed me out.

    Last week, Joe Rogan caused a stir when he claimed to have heard several of Antís gay jokes before. This week the flamboyant one comes on stage and tells more gay jokes. When John Witherspoon tells him that heís funny, but he should try something other than gay humor, Ant replies that he also jokes about his sobriety, and that heís been sober for 111 days Ė but not in a row. I donít need Joe Rogan to tell me thatís an old joke. Apparently Ant is a one trick pony, and itís a stolen pony at that.

    Geoff Brown is up next. Last week I screwed up and spelled his name J-E-F-F. Sorry about that, Mr. Braun. Geoff does a bit about how he faked being gay when he was called by the Marine reserves. His performance was better than last week, and heís comfortable on stage.

    Last week I was surprised that Jen Kirwin advanced in the competition; I just didnít think she was funny. Her routine this week, in which she tells us that she likes dating older guys Ė like 85-90 year old guys, does nothing to change my impression of her.

    Impressions of Rob Cantrellís humor last week were mixed; some found him really funny and some didnít. I was one that thought he was pretty funny last week, and I thought he was even funnier this week. To me, his material isnít terrific, but the way he presents it is very good. Telling us he canít afford lottery tickets so he just looks at his bus transfer and says ďDamn!Ē cracked me up. See, that didnít seem so funny when you read it. Itís his delivery.

    Eddie Pepitone had the New York crowd chanting his name last week. This week tells us that heís been watching porn for 25 years and has realized that itís the same 11 people in all the films. I start to wonder if perhaps the crowd last week wasnít loaded with family and friends, because Eddie didnít make me laugh this week.

    Lang Parker gives us yet another example of a comedian with no range. Last week: jokes about being mistaken for a lesbian just because girls from Wisconsin are stout. This week: jokes about being mistaken for a lesbian just because girls from Wisconsin are stout. Buddy Hackett said she was a star, but I think this star just blinked out.

    Craig Baldo, one of the folks to come out of the east last week, does a bit about how you shouldnít try to pick up women in a ski lodge, then demonstrates why with a goofy ďlook, Iím wearing skisĒ walk. Craig, last week Mike Bocchettiís funny walk didnít get him to the next round Ė were you paying attention?

    Rich Vos comes on stage, and heís smooth. He says heís pathetic. He says heís dumb. He tells some pretty funny jokes to illustrate those points. But itís clear to me that Rich doesnít think that heís pathetic or dumb. In fact, I think that Rich thinks he is Godís gift to comedy. Phyllis liked his suit, and Victoria thinks heíd be funny on a sitcom, so itís clear that the judges like him.

    Carmen Lynch continues last weekís theme of jokes based on her height. She tells us that India sucks because she hit her head on everything. My thought - last week Rich Vos said Canada sucked and one of the judges was Canadian. Is Victoria Jackson secretly Indian?

    Last week Dave Mordal was one of the funniest guys Iíve seen in a while. I donít think this weekís power outage jokes are quite as good, but heís another one that just has great delivery. Phyllis loved his material and his style. Dave told her that he had planned on wearing a really nice suit, but Rich Vos took it.

    I know weíre only two weeks in, but Tere Joyce and her ďRight on, cha-cha-cha!Ē line is already getting on my nerves. With her spiked hair, Ms. Joyce tells us that she got her hair cut at the New York, New York Hotel (remember, weíre in Vegas) and she asked them to make her look like someone famous. I can see the Statue of Liberty punch line coming a mile away. The only thing about her that really stands out is that she may be the only woman on the planet that makes Phyllis Dillerís hair look good.

    John Priest tells us about getting dumped on Halloween, and I think he just got dumped from this competition.

    Randi Kaplan, who is from Staten Island, NY but participated in the West Coast competition (is that like Stanford playing in the East bracket of the NCAA tournament or something) uses a thong as a hair scrunchy, which was pretty funny, but it was the only joke we see her tell, which pretty much seals her fate.

    Ralphie May tells us about his trip to Thailand with the USO, and how after a baby elephant bumped into his, um, unit, he spent the rest of his trip walking around with a pocket full of peanuts hoping for another intimate encounter. I didnít think he was as drop-dead funny as last week, but I still love this guy. Heís very animated in his delivery, with eyes bulging and hands waving. It doesnít work for some, but for him itís perfect.

    In one of the few clips weíre shown tonight of the comics when they arenít on stage, Cory Kahaney ripped on Sean Kentís cowboy hat. When he finally admitted that he started wearing it after losing all his hair battling cancer, she doesnít just back down. Instead she tells him that if heíd been wearing a baseball cap that said ďMake-a-Wish FoundationĒ on it, she would have left him alone. Harsh, but funny.

    Itís no surprise that Cory is the next performer of the evening. Her joke about her dad ďadoptingĒ one of those third world children you see on TV is pretty clever. I think sheíll advance, but I donít think she can win the competition; marijuana has been mentioned in both her performances, and I doubt that NBC wants to promote that kind of humor on itís network. Now if this was FOXÖ

    Sean Kent tells us that the promotional picture of him on stage looks like a gay rodeo picture. Between him, Ant, and G-E-O-F-F, I think Iíve heard more gay humor than I do watching an episode of Will & Grace. I still donít think heís funny.

    In another rare behind the scenes clip, we hear from Jesse Taylor. He tells us that if his humor can make one personís day just a little better, then he feels like heís done his job. Puh-lease. I know weíre only into the third episode of this show, but if I have to hear one more aspiring comedian tell me that if they make just one person laugh, Iím going to puke. If you only make one person laugh, it doesnít mean youíve done your job Ė it means youíre not funny, and you should be thankful that your mom was in the audience.

    Jesseís routine tonight is about how tough his momma is, and how she wouldnít have put up with that little girl from The Exorcist in her house. Itís funny, but it reminded me a little too much of an Eddie Murphy bit about The Amityville Horror.

    For the second week in a row, the last performer is Dat Phan. And for the second week in a row, the guy has me and the audience in stitches. All the judges absolutely loved him. His jokes are funny when he tells them but not when I type them, so I encourage you to check him out next week.

    The Winners
    Youíll recall that the ten contestants that move on to the next round will share a house in Hollywood while the contest continues. Jay awards a big gold key to the house to each of the ten that will advance. They are Date Phan, Dave Mordal, Cory Kahaney, Sean Kent, Geoff Brown, Tere Joyce, Rob Cantrell, Rich Vos, Tess, and Ralphie May. When Dat's name was announced, all the contestants cheered; he is clearly as well liked by them as he is by the audience.

    Weíre shown clips from next week, when Jay welcomes them to the Hollywood house. I know they do the same thing on American Idol, but I must admit that Iíve never watched AI once they reach that point so I donít know what to expect. Oops, I just lost the Clay Aiken fans that mistakenly stumbled across this article. Damn!

    Care to comment on this recap? Email me at wayner@fansofrealitytv.com

  2. #2
    would rather be cruising! marybethp's Avatar
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    Wayner - you really should be on this show. Your delivery is great on paper (er, screen). I see big things for you! (at least a great FORT following!). Thanks for the update, I fell asleep after Cory. (does it repeat on Comedy Central?)

    And this.....
    Geoff Brown is up next. Last week I screwed up and spelled his name J-E-F-F. Sorry about that, Mr. Braun.
    had me in absolute stitches.

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    Can They Do It?? mrdobolina's Avatar
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    Thanks for the recap, Wayner!!

    My favorites are Ralphie May(this guy is just funny. The fact that he is comfortable with his size, and makes hilarious jokes about it....well, He just cracks me up!), Dave Mordahl(being from the midwest, I like his brand of humor. He has great delivery...his punchline on the power outage..."at least soup's ready" was delivered so dead pan perfect.made me laugh out loud), and Dat Phan(again, he is just funny. Knowing a little about his upbringing is great too. For someone to have gone through that, and be hilarious today, speaks volumes).

    I like Rich Vos too, but he is kinda grating. A little too arrogant, methinks. Still funny.

    I am still surprised Eddie Pepitone didnt make it in. I am also surpised that Rob Cantrell did....nothing of his made me even chuckle. Sean Kent too. Although I think maybe they went with him because of the whole cancer thing, and the possible "conflict" that might be there with Corey.

    Thanks again, Wayner!
    "You don't own a TV?!? What's all your furniture pointed at?" Joey Tribianni

    It's not who you are underneath, but what you do that defines you.

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    FORT Fogey CantGetNuf's Avatar
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    "If you only make one person laugh, it doesnít mean youíve done your job Ė it means youíre not funny, and you should be thankful that your mom was in the audience."


    That cracked me up!!!!!!!!! Thanks for the recap Wayner!
    "You better watch your mouth sunshine."-Daryl Dixon

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    King of the world holiday's Avatar
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    Nice recap. This show thus far is crap, hope some funny stuff happens now that the finalists are in the house.

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    FORT Fogey
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    Did you hear the one about...?

    Okay, I admit it. This weekís show took place in Las Vegas, but there were no Gorgeous Vegas Babes. Well, unless you watched the commercials for the new James Caan series that NBC is promoting Ė there were plenty of GVB's there. I only threw that into the title because sex sells. If you donít believe me, go see how many hits the latest recap of For Love or Money has racked up this week. But before you do that, why donít you stick around and find out what happened on Last Comic Standing? Humor me.
    As Homer Simpson would say, "Why you little *&^%$#@!@#$%^&*!
    However, your recap is splendiferous and worthy of praise despite your cheap attempt at getting my attention. You would have gotten it anyway.

    Geoff Brown is up next. Last week I screwed up and spelled his name J-E-F-F. Sorry about that, Mr. Braun.
    Wayner, why didn't you try out for this gig, you acerbic so-and-so?

    I love the fact that you are not bowled over by the semi-finalists or the semi-funniest as the case may be. In my opinion, Dave Mordal does have the perfect timing and delivery that is so essential. Dat Fahn is ok, but why oh why do we have to hear about the ethnic/poverty (or gay) schtick all the time? Stop beating me over the head with it. I get it, I GET IT!

    Unfortunately, I think the show is floundering. Either they don't give the comics enough air time, or they don't give us a chance to really see what they can do. I hope this improves in time.

    LCS has a good premise, and my inner comic tells me that it could really be something good. I used to watch a lot of great stuff on Comedy Central before they went all "Hollywood" on us. Now THAT'S what I'm talking about!

  7. #7
    Soccer Kicks Balls cali's Avatar
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    First up this week is Tess. Last week Tess poked fun at her weight. This week, Tess, um, poked fun at her weight again. Good to see that the first of our twenty finalists has such range

    His next joke makes that first one sound clean and sophisticated. Iím disappointed, because his unprovoked shark attack bit in the East Coast Semiís cracked me up, but this week he just grossed me out.

    But itís clear to me that Rich doesnít think that heís pathetic or dumb. In fact, I think that Rich thinks he is Godís gift to comedy

    Sean Kent tells us that the promotional picture of him on stage looks like a gay rodeo picture. Between him, Ant, and G-E-O-F-F, I think Iíve heard more gay humor than I do watching an episode of Will & Grace. I still donít think heís funny.


    I loved the opening paragraph too
    "Rice is great when you're hungry and want 2,000 of something' -- Mitch Hedberg

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    I'm not sure about the legs of this show.

    IMlessthanHO, it appears that they really didn't enough of an initial turn out.

    Note that Mohr said these were the finalists from over 2,000 tryouts, didn't AI have like 2,000 go to Hollywood. I'm betting AI would get 2,000 trying out in Death Valley during the summer.

    After two weeks we're down to the top 10. 5 of the top 20 should have been left behind. I'm thinking they didn't have the bankroll to fully invest in the upfront costs of 3-4 months of initial screening.

    We know this is a total AI rip-off with comics so complete the rip-off and let it build; a little foreplay before the finally. On second thought showing 60 minutes of unfunny people isn't funny there job is to get us to laugh at them, so no "Like a Virgin" laughs.

    But, for God's sake quit showcasing the winners before they perform. You don't need to watch the ending just count the solo backstage profiles.

    Unless they start giving the final 10 some more time and they're funny I wouldn't expect a 2nd season. If there is I would expect a better turn out for initial tryouts and perhaps a better season run.

    "Let's be honest here" some of these comedians were dreadful simply dreadful.
    There are 10 types of people in the world, those who get binary and those who don't.

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    Transcendental Doctor Mosby's Avatar
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    Re: Did you hear the one about...?

    Originally posted by CaliGirl
    Unfortunately, I think the show is floundering. Either they don't give the comics enough air time, or they don't give us a chance to really see what they can do. I hope this improves in time.
    Right on. This show would be much better if they actually gave each person three minutes to do their act. 60 minutes - 16 minutes to sell soap flakes = 44 minutes of actual show. That's plenty of time to let 10 acts do 3 minutes of funny stuff. At the beginning, who cares about the background clips? At this point, all I care about is whether the contestants are funny or not.

    However, maybe it's the case that some of the 20 semi-finalists didn't even have three minutes of good stuff - which is pretty sad. Out of 2000 people, they couldn't even find 20 people with a solid three minutes of material?
    "It takes grace to play the second fiddle well" - The Fall, "Strife Knot"

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    Transcendental Doctor Mosby's Avatar
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    Re: The Vegas Finals: Gorgeous Vegas Babes

    Originally posted by Wayner
    Impressions of Rob Cantrellís humor last week were mixed; some found him really funny and some didnít. I was one that thought he was pretty funny last week, and I thought he was even funnier this week. To me, his material isnít terrific, but the way he presents it is very good. Telling us he canít afford lottery tickets so he just looks at his bus transfer and says ďDamn!Ē cracked me up. See, that didnít seem so funny when you read it. Itís his delivery.
    Interesting...I had the opposite response to Rob - I think his ideas are inventive and original, but to me, his delivery is clunky and his jokes are too wordy. He could cut a lot out and still retain the core of each joke. I am looking forward to seeing what else he has in store, but I think he is still a little green as a comic.
    "It takes grace to play the second fiddle well" - The Fall, "Strife Knot"

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