Recently, I saw a preview that hailed Kid Nation as the “the best reality TV show of all time.” Surprising because lately, I’m bored with it. I keep waiting for the twist, the most dramatic episode ever. It has yet to come. It’d be nice to see the kids run the town with no influence from producers. I’d like to see what they could do. After all, this is reality TV, is it not?
Dune Buggies Would Have Been Better
The kids in Bonanza City are starved for entertainment. Like me, they’re bored. Sophia is so bored that she resorts to lying down in the middle of the street. She’s unresponsive to the kids as they ask what she’s doing. They do what anyone who is bored to death would do. They join her. Sophia is surprised at how many kids lie down with her. If they’d chosen the water slide or the dune buggies in those past challenges
rather than listen to the producers, they’d have something better to do right now. I’m just sayin’.
DK has had enough. He rings the bell and calls a town meeting. Kids don’t know what’s going on since the Council usually has bell ringing duties. “We’re fed up,” DK announces. He and Maggie go on to say that they want a town that’s cool to hang out in. They demand the Council do something about it.
The Council recognizes that kids are bored and need something else to occupy their time. They head to the chapel to read the town journal and as fate *wink* would have it, the town’s forefathers offer a solution. They suggest a town talent show complete with dancing, singing, and performing. The Council is a little worried that it won’t satisfy the town. They head to the Mess Hall to make the announcement. The kids are overjoyed with the idea and rush to sign up. Olivia signs up to do a stand up comedy routine. Shocking, I wasn’t aware that she has a sense of humor. DK is pleased. He feels this type of entertainment is just what the town needs to get everyone laughing and enjoying themselves.
Laurel calls an impromptu council meeting. Since the kids embraced the talent show idea so enthusiastically, she proposes they award the gold star to the winner. Entertaining people, cheering people up, and making them laugh are just as important as hard work and deserving of the gold star. The others agree that the social aspects are just as important as the physical aspects of life Bonanza City.
Practice Makes Almost Perfect
Excitement is in the air as the kids practice their routines. Kennedy plans to do a dancing comedy act. She practices a rap about herself with Guylan as her audience. “My name is Kennedy. I’m from Kentucky,” she chants. It needs some work. She should enlist Guylan to beat box along. Jared plans a monologue from “Henry V.” To him, Shakespeare is one of the greatest poets of all time. He rehearses for the chickens and although he stumbles over the words, they don’t complain. He’s disappointed, however, and regrets signing up.
Sophia prods Olivia to share a bit from her stand up routine but she refuses. Sophia privately wonders how someone with such an aversion to fun can be funny. Frankly, so do I.
Greg and Blaine rehearse a skit from Romeo and Juliet. Greg admits that he’s never read Shakespeare. Their spoof is sure to bring the kids to laughter. Greg (Juliet) hangs from the balcony as Blaine(Romeo) tries and fails to climb a rope up to
The Simple Life v 2.0
In the kitchen, Savannah and Kennedy prepare a “Kentucky” meal for the town. They plan to make sautéed red bell peppers and dumplings to bring a little piece of Kentucky to Bonanza City. Savannah is really missing her grandmother and feels she’d be proud to see her cooking. Just thinking of it all, makes her very homesick and sad.
Greg and Blaine are still working hard despite being upper class. Natasha and Migle don’t share their dedication. They’d rather talk about clothes or boys all day. In fact, some of the kids have dubbed them Paris and Nicole. Greg and Blaine hatch a plan to throw the next showdown so the blue team will be laborers, thereby forcing the Paris and Nicole duo to do the lowliest of work. The girls are worried that will make everyone hate them.
Savannah is still struggling with thoughts of home. She misses her family and the Kentucky dinner is making her think of them even more. Alex tries to encourage her by letting her know what a positive contribution she is to Bonanza. Can I just say that I love this kid? He is the cutest!
Showdown time and Jonathan must be reading my recaps. He’s ditched the drab brown and is wearing a blue Western shirt that is not so bad. Well, for a Western shirt, that is. Since this show seems to follow a scripted weekly theme, the showdown pertains to art. The kids will have their own art project to complete. It’s basically paint-by-numbers. Rather than paint, they’ll be using bubble gum. They’ll have an hour to chew colored gumballs and stick them on the corresponding numbers to create their district’s masterpiece. This seems like an appropriate place to “EW!” Talk about spreading germs! Guylan gags at the thought of handling someone else’s saliva. As always, if all four teams complete the task in the allotted time, they’ll earn a huge reward for the town.
The kids chew as fast as they can but their jaws tire quickly with all of the chewing. They’re also disgusted as they handle the saliva-dripping wads of bacteria. Natasha and Migle are nervous about Greg and Blaine’s threats so they’re chewing the gum like crazy to help their district. Now, if these two were really Paris and Nicole, I’d make an inappropriate joke here about blowing and bubblegum. However, they aren’t the BFF socialites so I won’t. Greg admits his threats were empty and he actually has no intention of throwing the competition. Campbell gets into the challenge and begins to dance as he chews. The green district kicks butt and for the first time, they finish first to become upper class. Blue finishes second to become the town’s merchants. The red district is next and they’ll be the cooks. Yellow is unable to finish in time. They are not only the laborers, but the kids lose the reward. They groan as Jonathan reveals the rewards. They could have chosen from gallons of paint to brighten up the town or all night block party complete with disco ball, strobe lights, food, music, and balloons. They’re disappointed that they missed out on that chance for fun and look forward to the talent show.
As the green district celebrates their victory, Savannah cries in her bunkhouse. She doesn’t want to be in Bonanza but at home with her family. Kennedy and Mike offer encouragement to their friend but she’s unsure if she’ll stay.
Taylor, the beauty queen, is not happy about her district’s position as the laborers. She complains about the “boys smelly poisoning” as she gathers the laundry to wash.
The Next American Idols...if Fantasia can do it, anyone can
Markelle emcees as they kick off the talent show. Kelsey places an impressive piece on the piano. Guylan says he thought Chopin had risen from the dead to perform. She was good but I wouldn’t go that far. Campbell does his best shrieking cockatiel impression followed by Eric’s performance of a song about his home state of New Jersey. Jared then takes the staged for his monologue. The kids are impressed that he was able to memorize and recite that much. Greg and Blaine take the stage in dresses and their interpretation of Romeo and Juliet has the kids rolling with laughter. Jasmine gets a standing ovation with a song written by her brother. Finally, Olivia is up. Laurel heckles her a little but she bounces back. Her jokes are all about the other kids and they’re a hit. Sophia gives her props for a job well done. So do I. Kennedy’s silly routine was next. She made a complete fool of herself. It was so bad, it was good. The kids howl as she dances and raps.
Savannah then takes the stage to announce her decision. The talent show has cheered her up considerably and she’s realized that everyone wants her to stay.
It’s gold star nomination time and the Council isn’t surprised when Divad once again nominates herself. Guylan feels she needs to do more than cook potatoes before she’s eligible for the star. The kids are all torn between Olivia and Kennedy because both were so entertaining in the talent show.
At the Town hall Meeting, DK asks Laurel to sing for them and she does an impressive rendition of “Amazing Grace.” To bad they can’t give the gold star to Laurel. Mike is spot on as he says that she’s a great kid. Now, they move on to business as usual and the gold star is awarded to Kennedy. She thanks the town and the council for rewarding her differences and proclaims that you don’t have to be one of the cool kids. The kids applaud as she leaves to call her mom. Both are moved to tears as they speak. About the star, Kennedy says, “This is my precious jewel of my hard work and weirdness…I love it.”
Divad is disappointed once again over the gold star winner. She thinks it should go to someone who works hard but quickly shushes herself because she doesn’t want to be judgmental. Should we tell her that it’s too late?
Next week, the kids protest as the Council attempts to mix things up by changing the districts.
What is your talent? PM me.