Welcome back everyone. Last week, Chance came back and much to my surprise did not end up staying. Pretty was sent packing with swirling rumors that he was more interested in the men than New York…who looks like a man in a dress. I guess he likes butch men. This week, we narrow down the numbers and at this point, does anyone really care who wins? I really don’t. I just want to see New York get dissed again by the man she chooses on National TV again. I’m in a bit of an evil mood tonight but for some reason that seemed just about right last season. Let’s all relax on our couches and pull out our finest forty in a brown bag and get ready to watch this ranch coated mess.
Finding the True Psychos
The men all get up and are told they will get a nice breakfast to help make up for the crazy night they had. The men all discuss the happenings until New York joins them. She for once actually looks normal and not like a common street walker. New York apologizes to the men and tries to make them feel good so they want to stay. She tells them she has a fun day planned and they will be taking a psychology test.
Buddha is disgusted with the whole situation and New York picks up on that. She pulls him aside and he tells her that he thinks she still wants to be with Chance. She tries to make him feel better and apologizes. Buddha is going to keep his eye on her…or her generous chest.
They arrive at the Psych clinic and meet the psych technician. The men will be evaluated on compatibility and the most compatible man gets a date with her. The men and New York have to do a series of test like the ink blot test, drawing pictures, and being heavily questioned on why they would find someone like New York attractive. Maybe not that last part but it would seem appropriate.
After the tests are done the doctor goes over some of the test results with the men. He tells them about their faults and makes them feel like crap. On a side note, the doctor is kind of a squirrely looking man. Meanwhile, back in the waiting room, Buddha starts talking to the men about his “acting” gigs. New York gets really irritated with this behavior. She yells at him and gets up and storms out. He follows her out of the room, she tells him to leave, and he does. Wrong move! She is convinced he is there for the cameras. I actually give Buddha the benefit of the doubt and think he is there for NY, maybe I am naïve though.
The doctor comes out and gives the test results to New York and the rest of the men. He announces that the Entertainer is the best match and they are the most compatible. The two of them will be going on a ranch doused date at some low class club I am sure.
Two Lame Jokes
New York and the Entertainer head out on their date for the evening. The rest of the guys decide to make the house spooky so that when the Entertainer comes back he will be scared. They mention putting candles out in a funny shape. Ooooh, scary! Back to the date, New York and the Entertainer are having dinner and having a good time. During the whole date, I can’t stop staring at the Entertainers lips; it looks like he is wearing a nice, shiny, lip gloss. It is so distracting. The conversations moves to them having sex, I bang my head with the remote in hopes of passing out. When I come to, a belly dancer is at the table and New York wants him to dance with her. He doesn’t want to and New York gets really mad. This whole situation is lame.
The date is finally over and they climb in the limo to head back to the house. The Entertainer wants to play a joke on the men and pretend like the date went horrible. He wants to storm around and start packing his things and get the men all wound up. As he is getting ready to leave he is going to turn to the men and yell “psych.” This joke sounds really good. When he arrives at the house, he is so caught up in his act he doesn’t even notice the other crap the men left to scare him. Actually, none of the men are around to see his little tirade. He goes out to yell at them and tell them he is leaving. Frankly, I am embarrassed for everyone on this show right now. The men all grab his bags and help him to the door. When he gets out the door, he yells “psych” and everyone seems really confused. That was the worst prank I have ever seen!
After the little games are over Buddha and New York talk. She thinks he seems distant, she doesn’t want to trust him but she really likes him. I can’t blame her at all, he is the only decent one left on the show. Tailor Made makes a phone call to his ex wife and she tells him that she saw Buddha on some dating show on BET. Tailor Made of course runs and tells everyone so the word will get around.
New Day, New Tests (Not the STD kind)
The men all receive a letter from New York telling them they will be tested to see who is in it for the long haul. Each man will meet New York’s therapist to do couples counseling with New York. The Entertainer is up first. The therapist puts them through some silly scenarios. The rest of the men come through and this is a lot less entertaining than it could be. Buddha finally rolls in and we should see what happens here. The doctor gives him some scenario and New York starts calling him a liar. She doesn’t like that she’s not in control. He is too dominating for her; she wants someone who is going to be her wife. He basically tells her that it’s not going to happen.
Punk is in with his session with the doctor and he tells her about Buddha being on the other dating show. She pulls him aside to talk to him about it. He admits to it and she is still convinced that he is in the house for the camera. He is driving her insane and it’s pretty funny.
Narrowing Down the Losers
Its elimination night and I really have no idea who is going home tonight…nor do I care. New York shows up in a horrible dress, it’s really bad and extra skanky. She hands out the chains to Punk, Tailor Made, The Entertainer, and Buddha. Mr. Wise is sent packing because of his relationship with his ex. He is a creepy little man and I know I won’t miss him at all.
Next week, tune in to see the parents come to the house, Sister Patterson get a little crazy, and the parents shocked looks when they see who their sons are dating.
If you think season 3 should be called I Love Yardgnome, send me a PM and I will see if I can get the ball rolling on that.