Explosive—like lighting up during a gasoline fight. So I would like to take this opportunity to request that, in this thread at least, you guys go on and…knock yourselves out. Cuss your little potty mouths off. Use all the lingo u r 2 kewl 2 resist. Hurl insults at each other. Question the virtue of each others’ mothers. Free me from my misery. Please.
You all know how much I adore Vic’s voiceovers, and I’m thrilled to say this episode is just chock-full of Vic-tastic nuggets of wisdom. She amazes us now with the revelation that understanding teenagers is hard. Wow. Deep. Let’s all ponder that.
(Is it wrong that I’m hoping one of the lemmings finds a cliff? Just for the good of humanity. The gene pool must be cleansed.)
(One wonders…would she be okay with a tattoo of a frying pan? Discuss).
Because they don’t make morphing tattoos, do they? Ones that start out looking like a picture of John Gotti, but then fade into the playboy logo after a month… Well, I’m sure they’ll develop the technology soon.
For a moment, let us consider the GUG logo at the top of this page. The name Gotti, framed in gold and studded with diamonds like some rapper’s tasteless, oversized neckplate. This (and the mansion, and the cars, and the jewelry…) would seem to suggest that the Gottis are affluent, and I wonder why Vic always complains about making ends meet. Maybe it’s one of those rich people things—“I can’t afford to buy an island off the coast of Rio de Janeiro, thus I must be at starvations door.” Or maybe I’m too judgmental. You decide.
(Lil’ Foreshadowing kicks me in the shins and runs away giggling).
Now, I miss a lot of this conversation, even with the closed captioning on, because these boys mumble like Guido broke their jaws for being late with the protection money.
Larry enjoys rubbing in how much the tattooing is going to hurt. He says that when he got his, he “wanted to cry,” and a strange echo effect repeats the word “cry, cry, cry.” The editors must be as bored as I am—they’re trying to spice it up.
Vic flirts a little, very lame stuff about how she needs their help because it’s “just lil’ old me here.” Old being the key word.
Vic also asks them to wash her Mercedes. Tacky. That’s like asking the grocery checker to walk your dog.
John calls her crazy and Vic says “I’ll show you crazy!” But she doesn’t, and I’m disappointed. I was hoping for a Simpsons-The Shining scene (“No TV and no beer make Homer…..” “Go crazy?” “Don’t MIND if I do!”).
The beautiful moment has come; another week of GUG is behind us. But I sense an atmosphere of hostility here… You don’t like my take on the Gottis? Well…let’s fight about it. C’mon. I triple dog dare you.