8-2 recap: Judge Not, Lest Ye End Up On Reality TV, Too

[hepcat]

Yay spegs! I'm not watching the show (cable deficient) but I'm loving the doublecap. Way to start the season!

Vic and Luigi then celebrate the time honored stereotypes of male-female interpersonal communication with the “Do you think I’m fat?” argument. In my opinion Luigi wins. He claims he can tell even a two pound difference because he measures cement, and that’s one I’ve never heard before.

These people are morbidly fascinating through your retelling.

[dagwood]

In the palatial bathroom, the camera focuses on the basket of reading material beside the commode; on the very top is the New York Post from the day John Gotti died. Please tell me this was set up by the production staff. Please tell me Vic doesn’t like to read about her father’s demise while she does her business.

One woman at the meeting gets her face blurred out, and I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking: Witness Protection Program.

The boys are fighting, and Pete finds this “uncouth.” “That’s not where we came from, and that’s not what we’re about,” he reminds them. Yes, Pete. Because non-violence has always been the Gotti family motto, right?

And I’m thinking no one could get a good enough grip on those greasy heads to do any damage. Ah ha! Have we discovered the motive behind the madness?

Aww, come on Spegs. Isn't front page coverage of the death of dear old dad what everyone wants to read while doing their business?

[Shazzer]

Let the merriment commence. Woo. Hoo.

And please remember, if you send me death threats, you are just proving my point, people.

But the house is only haunted by the ghost of her marriage, and she thinks it’s time for a change.

Save Your Bombs for the Dinner Table, Part I

(to be known from this point on as “Snot-nosed Punk #1, #2 and #3”),

Vic answers the door in an abominable snowman costume (on the plus side, if there’s a spill, I’ll bet that thing is very absorbent).

on the very top is the New York Post from the day John Gotti died. Please tell me this was set up by the production staff. Please tell me Vic doesn’t like to read about her father’s demise while she does her business.

Mona finally leaves, after she and Vic compliment each other’s boobs and both insist they are 100% natural. They don’t believe each other, and neither does anyone else in the universe.

Vic says that the Star’s not going to win any Pulitzers, but they write the stuff people really care about. How sad for people.

One woman at the meeting gets her face blurred out, and I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking: Witness Protection Program.

Books By Their Covers…

The Shortest Episode of Blind Date Ever

Picture Montgomery Burns with Ned Flander’s bushy mustache.

Vic calls him arrogant to his face, noting that he says stupid things without thinking, says that it’s no mystery why he’s single, and then she stands up and walks out. I am forced to mutter, “Go girl,” and envy her cajones.

The End
I wish

Sleeping With The Fishes Sounds Better All the Time

I also feel the need to comment on the lameness of Vic’s voiceovers. They are lame.

The Other Mario Brother

(I know I’ve already made one Simpsons reference, but I have to quote Moe here: “La-tee-frickin’-da!”).

Taking Credit For Something You Didn’t Do Only Works When You’re Not Being Filmed For A TV Show

See the cameras, boys? That little red flashing light means you’re going to get caught.

The End…This Time I Mean It
anybody want a peanut?

For the final scene of the evening (YES! YES! YES! *pumping fist in the air*),

As the credits roll, the boys have a screaming fight over an empty tube of hair gel. Kind of sums up the whole show, doesn’t it?

Go ahead and send me your death threats—if you kill me, I don’t have to watch this show again: spegs@fansofrealitytv.com

A fantastic job, spegalicious!! Oh man I tried watching this show, all for you, and holy cow was it crap, yet you did an AMAZING job of taking something utterly craptacular and turning it into a witty, engaging, tasty morsel...........yet again! I bow to your greatness!

And I'm all for slamming as many Simpson's references as you can into a recap! Go! Go! Go!

Another fantastic recap...a double 'cap of deliciousness! Hip..hip...hooorayyy!! *tosses confetti*

[mrcorkles]

I'm sorry you had so little to work with,but well done Spegs!!

[Chorita KaBoom]

After saying that I wasn't going to watch this, I kinda got forced in to seeing it (my house guest wanted to see it so... ) I watched it. My gawd, it was so bad. Spoiled, obnoxious geasie headed teenagers with a spoiled, overly dramatic, vain mother. From the fly over shots you would think that their home was rather fabulous, but up close it is apparent that there hasn't been adequate upkeep going on. She wants to sell that house? I don't think that she's gonna get many offers after people see it on tv. She goes on a date with a man that see has already has declared that she wouldn't be attracted to. Victoria has this habit of baiting people, she puts things out here in hopes of starting an argument. She did it with the pool guy about her wait, too. Ugh! Some have tried to compare this family to the Osbournes, but while the Osbourne kids might argue with their parents, they've never been as disrespectful as these boys are to their mother. I won't even allow a house guest to watch this any more.