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Thread: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

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    Best Ever Pool Runner Angry Birds Champion, Rancho Ice Racer Champion pikachu's Avatar
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    Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    Today I was thinking about how hard it is to find what you want to do in life. Unless you're born with an innate talent or find a role model to follow, it can be hard to decide on your career goals. Often what we end up doing is very different from what we wanted as a child. If you had a chance to go back and do things over, with the benefit of hindsight, would your goals have changed?

    ***
    When I was little, I dreamed of being a singer, an artist, or a writer. My sister and I discussed having a ranch or farm so we could raise animals but I think that was more her dream. I love playing with animals or taking pictures of them but wouldn't necessarily want the responsilbility of taking care of a whole bunch of animals. Along the way, I lost my aspiration to become a singer because, although I like to write poetry, the idea of performing in front of an audience scared me to death!

    I ended up following the path of least resistance and going into clerical work. I hate it because it's not challenging enough and my mom had a similar career and was never satisfied with it. I didn't want to end up like her. I'm trying to get into computers or graphic design but it's hard to find jobs right now. Plus, at my age, it's hard to start off at entry-level in a new field when there are younger people with much more experience than me vying for the same jobs.

    If I could go back and choose a new profession, I would like to have gotten into dance or photography. I ended up really liking those two things later on in life. It's not too late for me to get into photography now but I think it would be more of a side-job or hobby at this point rather than a profession. I might also have tried getting into writing. Perhaps if I had written articles for a school paper or local magazine when I was younger, I might have had a writing career by now.

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    FORT Fogey Miss Scarlet's Avatar
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    Growing up as a child in the 60's a common thing we played was "What do you want to be when you grow up?" The answers were the usual stereotypes: "I want to be a nurse" "I want to be a teacher" "I want to get married & be a mommy".
    Mine was always the same, not what I wanted to be, but what I wanted to do. "I want to go places & see what's there & live on my own". It was usually a game stopper. It wasn't the "normal" little girl thing to say at the time. The other girls thought I was foolish & didn't want to play it anymore if I didn't give an answer they wanted. A 1960's "girl" answer.

    I ended up doing just what I wanted. I moved out of state after 1 year of college to see what else was out there. I've lived in 4 states in totally different parts of the country, lived on my own, got married, met new people, had kids, stayed home for a while to raise my children, went back to work, got divorced & am living on my own again - happily & providing for myself just fine. In the process of it all I've travelled the country a lot.
    I still love to travel & see new places. Our country has loads to see.

    My regret is that I didn't finish college. I would have loved to have a college education, although I've gone back & taken a number of classes, mostly work-related.

    What I wanted to be was never important. It's always what I wanted to do. Mostly I wanted to experience life & enjoy it in whatever & wherever I found myself. I've done that.
    "Is this Heaven? No, it's Iowa. --Field of Dreams--"

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    Best Ever Pool Runner Angry Birds Champion, Rancho Ice Racer Champion pikachu's Avatar
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    I must admit a career wasn't what I've always had in mind. I had assumed I would get married and was hoping I could be a full-time, stay-at-home mom. I never got that opportunity so eventually I realized I had to have a career so I could afford to support myself and have the comforts I wanted. I just wish I earned more money so I could afford to go on vacations and put some money into savings.

    The most important thing is enjoying your life and experiencing the things you want to in the time you're given.

    Good for you staying true to yourself, Miss Scarlet, and living life on your own terms without needing to be defined by a role like the other girls in your time!

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    RENThead JLuvs's Avatar
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    From the age of 4 I wanted to become a teacher & I am lucky enough to be one. Finding & keeping a job has been a challenge in CA these last 10 years that I have been certified.

    Could I have picked something simpler and with more stability? Yes and at times I felt a lot of familial pressure and concern to go for a profession with more security.

    Sometimes, like now when I am full time teacher and student, I wonder for a split second what my life would have been like if I was a lawyer right now.

    Truly though, that doesn't last long as I am SO Happy. Do I wish I knew if I was working in my current position next year? Of course. But I trust and believe I am doing what I was called to do.
    Whenever you see darkness, there is extraordinary opportunity for the light to burn brighter.
    -Bono

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    FORT Fogey Miss Scarlet's Avatar
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    Quote Originally Posted by JLuvs View Post
    From the age of 4 I wanted to become a teacher & I am lucky enough to be one. Finding & keeping a job has been a challenge in CA these last 10 years that I have been certified.

    Could I have picked something simpler and with more stability? Yes and at times I felt a lot of familial pressure and concern to go for a profession with more security.

    Sometimes, like now when I am full time teacher and student, I wonder for a split second what my life would have been like if I was a lawyer right now.

    Truly though, that doesn't last long as I am SO Happy. Do I wish I knew if I was working in my current position next year? Of course. But I trust and believe I am doing what I was called to do.
    I had a conversation with a friend about just that this weekend. We came to the conclusion that the big bucks aren't as important as doing something you like with people you like & for people you like. Too many people are making a lot of money but hate going to work everyday, either because of disliking the job or disliking the people/working conditions.

    I like to believe that teachers got into the profession because, like you, that's what they truly want to do. Hopefully most stay for that reason too.
    Hopefully your superiors see your commitment & keep you there for a long time.
    "Is this Heaven? No, it's Iowa. --Field of Dreams--"

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    PWS
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    I did a lot of student advising (college) and discussing about careers, especially as I was advising students in a non-traditional major without an obvious career track. My advice to them was to figure out what they liked to do first and then figure out how to get paid for it, remembering that even the best job has parts you won't like---the goal is to have most parts be what you do like. That's in retrospect though---when I was young I certainly never visualized being a college professor, and certainly not in the field I wound up in because it didn't exist when I was in college. I never knew any professors growing up---not something I ever considered, just kind of kept moving forward and fell into it. Looking back it turns out it fit very well with all the things I loved growing up, but who knew... The other thing I liked about it was that it allowed me to change what I as doing fairly frequently, so I didn't get bored. Work in a new field, teach new classes, do administrative work (which I actually like and am good at), etc.
    But when I was young...no clue. I liked archaeology (still do), and vaguely thought I might like to do something like that...although it was hard to figure out how to combine field work and any kind of relationship/family stuff. There are still things, like writing, that I'd like to try my hand out now that I"ve retired...somehow though I'm still "too busy"...which I'm told is not a good sign re becoming a writer...a writer makes time to write!

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    FORT Fogey Dragonlady's Avatar
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    Quote Originally Posted by PWS View Post
    There are still things, like writing, that I'd like to try my hand out now that I"ve retired...somehow though I'm still "too busy"...which I'm told is not a good sign re becoming a writer...a writer makes time to write!
    You really stated the Truth here....I thought retirement meant I'd be able to do all those things I wanted to do....but I constantly seem far too busy to do them. And I'm not sure how that happened!!
    But the one thing I always wanted was to be doing something in art. Was very discourage by my parents when young, then there were a home, family, many jobs to do. Now I finally paint (oils) and take classes for it. It fulfills me like I always thought it would and any free time goes there. But I still wish I had more time to do it.

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    FORT Fogey Lizard's Avatar
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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    My husband's Natal chart said that he would make a good teacher. Another friend's said she would be good investigations. That is her job and she loves it. So you might consider pulling a free Natal chart (google ). Mine does not say anything about career.
    You can do it!

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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    I always wanted to be a teacher growing up. I went to college and changed my mind to get a business degree. Last 2 years of college, I changed again to be a teacher. Student teaching proved it wasn't for me but I graduated with that degree and have been working clerical (Administrative Assistant/Office Manager) for the last 20 years. I am happy in that I do like what I do, however, I am far from challenged. I think now that I love computers and working with networks, and internet that I should have gone into computers somehow, either in programming or coding, or network analyst or something. I do regret it a bit but it is what it is. I have no desire to go back to school so I'll just keep things flowing as they are. I love my life though!

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    Re: Aspirations--what you wanted to be, what you became, what you'd do differently

    When I was young I always wanted to be a stay at home wife and mother or an actress. lol Later on I wanted to be a teacher but since I am so shy I decided against that career and chose nursing and loved it. A stroke and a back injury ended that, my kids are grown and now I am a stay at home wife. lol

    If I were to change anything, I think it would be to start saving money as soon as I started working instead of blowing my paychecks on partying in my teens etc. Now at 47 and not being able to work anymore, I miss the income and the clients that I had, the feeling of self worth I guess you could call it

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