+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 19 of 19

Thread: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

  1. #11
    Forum Assistant sweetpea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    5,800

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    Thank you all so much for your replies. I did meet the teacher today and will have an appointment with her soon to talk about my daughter and her sensitivity. Of course, the teacher was fine to the parents, if not particularly friendly. The girls are in the only french immersion school in our town, so I am very hesitant to remove them. They love being in the immersion program so she would be very set back if she was suddenly switched to an English school. I plan to, as most of you say, bring my concerns directly to the teacher in a non confrontational way, more of a "how can we work together to make this a positive year for her" kind of way. I am also going to document everything in a diary I'll keep, in case the next step is going to the principal. The teacher is definitely aware that I am a hands-on parent who will be there a lot, and who will pay attention to what is going on in the classroom. I also mentioned to her today that I also work for the school district, so perhaps that will have some impact.

    You are right in that if this is indeed her last year she is highly unlikely to change all of a sudden, and it's unlikely the administration will do anything about her. So my option at this point is just to be very visible, talk to her about the best learning environment for my child, and keep talking to my girl about her day and what is happening. If worse comes to worse I'll do what my sister did for her son when he encountered the same kind of thing. She had a meeting with her son and the teacher, and then very clearly said to her son, in front of the teacher "______ you don't need to be afraid of Mrs. _______! She's not here to yell at you or be mean, she's here to help you to learn. That's her job and what she loves to do! She's not going to yell at you, she's going to help you when you need it and if she can't then she's going to call me and we'll talk about it. Remember, Mrs. _______ is a teacher, and teachers aren't going to yell at their class, they are going to encourage and teach their class!"

    The teacher never yelled again that year, apparently!

  2. #12
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    Quote Originally Posted by sweetpea;3195394;
    Thank you all so much for your replies. I did meet the teacher today and will have an appointment with her soon to talk about my daughter and her sensitivity. Of course, the teacher was fine to the parents, if not particularly friendly. The girls are in the only french immersion school in our town, so I am very hesitant to remove them. They love being in the immersion program so she would be very set back if she was suddenly switched to an English school. I plan to, as most of you say, bring my concerns directly to the teacher in a non confrontational way, more of a "how can we work together to make this a positive year for her" kind of way. I am also going to document everything in a diary I'll keep, in case the next step is going to the principal. The teacher is definitely aware that I am a hands-on parent who will be there a lot, and who will pay attention to what is going on in the classroom. I also mentioned to her today that I also work for the school district, so perhaps that will have some impact.

    You are right in that if this is indeed her last year she is highly unlikely to change all of a sudden, and it's unlikely the administration will do anything about her. So my option at this point is just to be very visible, talk to her about the best learning environment for my child, and keep talking to my girl about her day and what is happening. If worse comes to worse I'll do what my sister did for her son when he encountered the same kind of thing. She had a meeting with her son and the teacher, and then very clearly said to her son, in front of the teacher "______ you don't need to be afraid of Mrs. _______! She's not here to yell at you or be mean, she's here to help you to learn. That's her job and what she loves to do! She's not going to yell at you, she's going to help you when you need it and if she can't then she's going to call me and we'll talk about it. Remember, Mrs. _______ is a teacher, and teachers aren't going to yell at their class, they are going to encourage and teach their class!" The teacher never yelled again that year, apparently!

    Oh that has to be the BEST thing I've ever read/heard! What a great, great idea. Wish I had known it years ago.

    This should be published in some parenting book.

    Perfect, perfect response. I hope you don't have to use it, but I'd love to be a fly on the wall if you do.

    If you do use it, you have to tell us what the teacher's face looked like.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  3. #13
    Premium Member canuckinchile's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    back in "The Big Smoke"
    Posts
    6,962

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    Sweetpea, I think you are really on the right track. Both my girls are in University now (I have one in grade 8) but they were in French immersion and it helped them immensely, so I understand wanting to keep them in it. I remember one particularly bad grade 5 teacher at the school that one of them had(before we moved South) that they still talk about. It was a bit of a rough year but we got her through it. They both had some exceptional teachers as well, but its always the bad ones you remember. Being aware, talking to her about it, and using it as a learning experience as much as you can will offset some of the negativity. I was really sensitive and had a "yeller" in grade two. By the end of the year I didn't even blink Also, is it possible for you to volunteer in the classroom? I got particularly involved at the school that "bad" year, helping at the office etc. It is a good way to see what is going on at the school, getting to know the school staff and getting known as a "reasonable, helpful parent". Oh, and I am not that conniving I always volunteer, but that year I was especially visible at the school.

  4. #14
    FORT Newbie Denna40's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Morinville
    Posts
    45

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    I'm a teacher and a parent of twins. I completely agree with what's been said so far.....be very visible in the school, pop into the classroom at different times and let this teacher know that you are aware of what's going on and will be keeping an eye on the situation. I love what your sister did as well, Sweetpea. That's a great way to get your point across and to act as an advocate for your child. And, make the teacher fully aware that you are paying attention.

  5. #15
    FORT Fogey Pyramid Solitaire by Disney's Tangled Champion combatcutie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    hangin' with the girls drinking Cosmos
    Posts
    7,737

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    Quote Originally Posted by sweetpea;3195394;
    If worse comes to worse I'll do what my sister did for her son when he encountered the same kind of thing. She had a meeting with her son and the teacher, and then very clearly said to her son, in front of the teacher "______ you don't need to be afraid of Mrs. _______! She's not here to yell at you or be mean, she's here to help you to learn. That's her job and what she loves to do! She's not going to yell at you, she's going to help you when you need it and if she can't then she's going to call me and we'll talk about it. Remember, Mrs. _______ is a teacher, and teachers aren't going to yell at their class, they are going to encourage and teach their class!"

    The teacher never yelled again that year, apparently!

    This is by far the BEST thing I have ever read about fixing a problem with a teacher. I have actually copied it and plan on saving it, just in case. I don't have children yet, but I know it is just a matter of time before I do and my need this someday
    I can only please one person a day, today is not your day and tomorrow doesn't look good either

  6. #16
    FORT Fanatic
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Houston
    Posts
    711

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    Hi, well I'm a teacher (h.s.) in my classroom right now, and you need to speak with the principal, and express your concerns, then see if the three of you can speak together. Go with a positive calm attitude, but get your point across. Document and date everything, every conversation.

    Many years ago, when I taught kindergarten, my oldest daughter was in the other kindergarten room, with the "meanest" teacher. This woman used my child for an example of everything wrong, really hurting her self-esteem. Well, she transferred to my classroom. It was against our school board policy, but I refused to let this "nut case" harm my child or any child. She was placed on leave, and eventually retired.

    Have to go, but stand up for your child and all children! Good luck

  7. #17
    everyone's a critic... holly71's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    The Lone Star State
    Age
    43
    Posts
    4,366

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    I had a very mean teacher in grade 3 (interestingly) also. However, I was too timid to even tell my parents about the trouble I had with her. This woman had her favorites, & I was definitely not one of them. Not sure what I did to make her not like me, since back then I was very shy & quiet. Anyway, I think you should definitely speak to someone at the school who is in a position to take control of the situation.
    Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

  8. #18
    Me and my shadow Gutmutter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Always together.
    Posts
    12,889

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    There are mean teachers out there. I had one in third grade and my kids had one in 5th. That teacher would dump my daughter's desk contents on the floor if it was messy and made her work without a desk after that. On the other hand, I had to deal with an irate parent today because he felt I was singling his child out by not allowing her to bring her gym/lunch bag in my class. It is a clear law about blocking aisles - not my own rule, but what he was hearing from his child was that I was picking on her. He wanted a meeting with the principal present and I told him that was totally unnecessary. After going around in circles a couple of times, I told him that I wouldn't target her because I think she's one of the brightest, nicest kids in the class (all true). That got his attention and he backed down. What I'm trying to say is, start with the teacher and take what your child says with a grain of salt. Don't go straight to the principal.
    Count your blessings!

  9. #19
    Forum Assistant sweetpea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    5,800

    Re: What would you do about a "mean" teacher?

    I've heard some pretty crazy stories this week from other parents at the school, about their encounters with a 'mean' teacher. One Dad told about starting a play dough "fight" with another little boy in grade one. The teacher, when recess time came, made both boys kneel on hands and knees on a table by the door. As each child left to go outside for recess they were told to kick the boys in the bum. Seriously!! And he said some were pretty strong kickers.

    Quote Originally Posted by canuckinchile;3195500;
    Sweetpea, I think you are really on the right track. Both my girls are in University now (I have one in grade 8) but they were in French immersion and it helped them immensely, so I understand wanting to keep them in it.
    Thanks for the nod of encouragement. I really don't want to take them out of the immersion program, as they are both thriving academically in it. It's good to know about success stories, as there are a lot of people I've encountered who think we're crazy to have them in the program.

    I am VERY front and centre, I always walk my daughter to the classroom and come in to say goodbye. I've offered to volunteer in the class and with field trips (she wasn't too keen but I'll keep at it) and I am very careful to be friendly and smile. Emma seemed to have an ok day yesterday so I'm in a wait and see mode. Thanks again for all the advice!

+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.