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Thread: Why I Need Therapy

  1. #41
    Wait, what? ArchieComic Fan's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    misskitty, I don't comment too much on here anymore due to time and whatnot, but I just had to come out of "lurk" mode for this.

    Your new family member is adorable! And she IS lucky to have you (and you her). Don't let other people define who you are (the Dr. included - granted his medical opinion probably holds some weight but even doctors don't get everything right and some have pre-disposed biases that can sometimes hurt a patient more then help). I don't know who in your life is making you feel bad, but they are not you and at the end of the day it is your life to live how you wish. Unless someone is financially supporting you and has a stake in how you budget your expenses, then their opinion is just that. Nothing more or less and you don't have to listen to it if you don't want to.

    I'm sure you're feeling so upset because obviously it is the opinion of someone close to you. But tell those naysayers to just "shut it!" :nono. Or, you can start hawking in on all the decisions they've made that you don't approve of. Usually that shuts people up pretty quick . .

  2. #42
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    Quote Originally Posted by misskitty;2760010;
    I wish I didn't have to get scared everytime I had something wonderful to tell, for fear of being judged, yelled at, questioned beyond reason, and disappointing once again.

    I am very disappointed. Not in myself. But by those I thought would be happy and supportive of me.
    misskitty, Lexi is simply adorable. I'm wondering if it wasn't your sinister who said something cruel to you...no matter. The reason their words hurt you (I think) is because you love them and want them to love you unconditionally as well. You cannot change how other people are, but you CAN change how you react to them. I know it's difficult, but try not to let them have the power to upset you with their cruel words. It can be difficult to stand up for yourself, but if someone says something like, "WHY on earth would you adopt another stray cat?" say, "Why on earth wouldn't you? Ohmigod! You hate kittens, don't you!" Just throw it back at them and make them sputter!

    As you may know, I have a difficult time saying "no" to people when they ask me to do things. But I've gotten better at that. I also have gotten better at NOT sitting mute while someone insults me. Recently, someone made a big deal of how I wasn't as pretty as when I got married, and pointed out that I had gained some weight. Real polite, right? It hurt my feelings, but I just said, "You're not as pretty as when you were a guest at my wedding either! And the reason I'm fatter now is because I've been pregnant a handful of times and lost all the babies. How come you have a spare tire?" You should've seen the look on this woman's face!!! I just find that when I can't think of a rebuttal, I just repeat the same rude thing they said to me back to them ... and that usually shuts them up...

    My point is...a lot of people are jerks and they prey on the "weak"--or people who they think they can be mean and inconsiderate to. Don't give them that power.

    And again, Lexi is a doll! I hardly think having two pets makes you a crazy cat lady! For Pete's sake...whoever insulted you is a loon!

  3. #43
    FORT Fogey PGM35's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    I agree with everyone else, don't listen to them! I havent' seen Lexi yet but going to the Animal Lovers thread right now!

  4. #44
    26.2, baby! Allie's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    Misskitty. Another comment to add to the wisdom.

    It is easier to condemn an action than to do something yourself.

    You rock.

  5. #45
    MRD
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    Miss Kitty,

    You are an adult. You support yourself. It is NO ONE'S business but yours what you do. Tell them all to take a flying leap. No one has the right to make you feel bad for your decisions.

    I personally think that Lexi is a great addition to your family. I have 3 dogs and many times, they are a great comfort to me BECAUSE they can't talk and they DO NOT judge me like so many others do.

    In fact, many times I prefer to be with them than with people because of the above.

    So just love Lexi and let the nay sayers just be negative by themselves. But don't let their negativeness affect YOUR happiness. You ultimately control your own destiny and happiness and not them.

    I know it hurts when our loved ones "attack" us. But try not to let it get to you. You've done a great thing rescuing Lexi, so concentrate on that and your own household and let the others just go be negative without you for a while.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  6. #46
    FORT Fogey brunette trixie's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    Miss Kitty, that's such a shame that the people close to you can't be happy that you've adopted a new member of your family. I hope you realize that you haven't done anything wrong, so they obviously this has to do with their own issues.

  7. #47
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    Thank you so much everyone for your support and kind words.

    I'm so glad that I have you all to lighten my load and prop me up with positive feedback. I was so upset last night I couldn't even answer the phone.

    I only have 3 cats; Gracie, Mr. Tootles and now Lexi. I have no children, live alone, and have a home and yard to share with these little furry love-buckets. And they bring me the greatest joy every single day. More than my family, I have to admit. (except for my Dad)

    I don't want to start or prolong family arguments or fights by picking apart what they have done which could be considered wrong or inappropriate. That just leads to bad karma. I just want them to see what I am doing right for a change.

    Thank you so much again, for giving me strength and hope that I have done a good thing. Gracie thanks you, Mr. Tootles thanks you, and little Lexi-licious thanks you too!
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  8. #48
    Trouble in my life just1paul's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    misskitty - our cats or dogs or hamsters or whatever ARE our kids. You just tune out these nasty people, because the love we get from our kids is unconditional and for all they give us, they really want very little. A warm place to live, some food, regular check ups, a clean box or yard to do their "business" and some attention. You just do for you what you need to do.

    As someone once said "damn the torpedoes -full speed ahead"
    - The Dean Martin Show -

    Petula Clark: You know they say you can't buy happiness.
    Dean Martin: No but you can pour it..

  9. #49
    Got wings 9/19/2012 buglover's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    misskitty this reminds me of what is going on in my family right now. I have an uncle who never truly grew up and he's now 50 years old. He depended on my grandmother for everything including living in her 2nd house. The rest of the family condemns him every chance they get and bash him constantly. Who are we to judge him for how he chooses to live just because it isn't how we live. Family seems to be the worst at throwing around judgement and I say bah! It's your life and you live it however you want to. It's happiness that counts!
    Yup, with donuts!!

  10. #50
    Rock Stars! bbnbama's Avatar
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    Re: Why I Need Therapy

    From one cat lover to another...I think you did a helluva thing misskitty....when you look at Lexi as she purrs next to you or when she makes you laugh one of those good ole belly laughs from something funny she did....you'll know in your gut and your that you did a AWESOME thing and a right thing for you!
    Reality is the beginning...not the end....Wallace Stevens

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