Why I Need Therapy

[famita]

MRD, maybe they're just borrowing her for a little while. While I never had a daughter, I was one once, and I was a little bit of a mixture between Dennis the Menace, Snoop Dog, and Lolita. Whew! My mom told me when I had 3 sons that God was paying me back!

Maybe she is trying to spout a little (a lot) independence and doesn't know a smooth way to do it. Try to think of her as your little red-headed stepchild who is only visiting for a short while. And then when it gets to be too much, tell her you're going to rip her lips off.(That's what my best friend used to tell my kids when they misbehaved at her house!)

[misskitty]

... And then when it gets to be too much, tell her you're going to rip her lips off!

I've never heard that before! That would scare me for sure!

MRD: Breathe. Just breathe. And hug your doggies!

[canadian_angel]

I need therapy as it is doubtful I am going to let the child live to see her 17th birthday on Tues.
The pod people need to bring back the real child.

Speaking as a child who gave her mom some worries, just love her and she'll come around. I know I did!

[MRD]

I am loving her (and its getting more difficult ), but she's a teenager and I really shouldn't complain as she could be doing much worse things than mouthing off to mom.
I just know that the empty nest syndrome is not going to be a problem for me when it happens.

I had a teacher take out her stapler and threaten to staple my lips shut one time. I shut up too!

I'm am currently getting paid back under the "mother's curse": "I hope you have one just like you one day!!!"

[canadian_angel]

She does sound like a great daughter. I definitely think we all go through our growing pains and that's what keeps us growing and developing and changing. I could go on and on about my relationship with my mom. Suffice to say it was not as strong as it is now and that was definitely my fault, and a fault of circumstances. Regardless she always supported me and I'm happy to say I've turned out pretty darn decent. It sounds like you've raised her extremely well mrd. A good solid head on one's shoulders cannot be underestimated.

[MRD]

She does sound like a great daughter. I definitely think we all go through our growing pains and that's what keeps us growing and developing and changing. I could go on and on about my relationship with my mom. Suffice to say it was not as strong as it is now and that was definitely my fault, and a fault of circumstances. Regardless she always supported me and I'm happy to say I've turned out pretty darn decent. It sounds like you've raised her extremely well mrd. A good solid head on one's shoulders cannot be underestimated.

It's just infuriating when she doesn't use the head. I have asked her before "was your head with you all day today?" meaning you obviously didn't use it so did you leave it at home.

I know as she grows she and I will get along better. We do have moments that are absolutely fantastic. She is a lot of fun. And then there are the other moments. That's when I think about her going off to school and moving out.
But my mom and I were the same way and after I grew up a bit, my mom and I got really close. So I know it will probably be the same. She's testing her limits and her wings, getting ready to fly. She'll be 17 next week and starts school in May (she's out of HS already) and one day I know in my heart of heart she will say those words I long to hear: "mom, you know, you WERE right".

[misskitty]

... and one day I know in my heart of heart she will say those words I long to hear: "mom, you know, you WERE right".

Make sure you have a tape recorder handy! Then you can replay it as often as you need/want to!

[canadian_angel]

I cannot believe how often in the past year since I moved away that I've told Mom she was right. You will hear it and you'll hear it often!! I guarantee it.

Leaving home was the hardest thing I did. It's continually hard because there's things about where I live now (not my actual house, but the program/people) that are making it extremely difficult. But it's helped mom and I immensely. We're closer than ever. We had a real honest, open conversation about our relationship and our life thus far. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to talk about with my Mom, but after finishing it, it was the greatest moment I've ever felt. We were REAL with each other. It hurt, it stung, there were major tears, but now we're doing so much better.

[famita]

I think a lot of us have those "mother-daughter" moments. There were a few years that my mom and I didn't speak but once a year. I think those were the years that I was having babies and she didn't think we should. I tried to tell her that they were meant to be, that I was on birth control all three times, but she got really bitter. (I still don't understand the anger.) But, we moved on after we accepted that we could agree to disagree.

[buglover]

My mother and I fought non stop. She wanted control and I wouldn't give it. I ended up leaving my house at 16 to move in with friends. I got married at 18 and only in my 20's did I tell my mom she was right about everything. I was glad we grew close before she passed away. It all works out in the end.