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Thread: Etiquette Questions

  1. #631
    FORT Fogey Missyboxers's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by veejer;3189245;
    On the etiquette topic, has anyone ever heard of "Bridesman" and "Groomswoman"? A friend of mine went to a wedding recently where there was a mix of men and women on each side of the wedding party. If they were friends/relatives of the bride, they were on the bride's side and vice versa. They were called "Bridesmen" and "Groomswomen".
    I've heard of that, but I also went to a wedding last year in which most of the bridesmaids were selected by the groom and the groomsmen were selected by the bride, because she had more close guy friends and I think he had more close lady friends.

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    MRD
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by doxie;3189846;
    I have heard of that. To each their own, but I don't really think I want to be a "Groomswoman!".

    Having said that, I just got married last December. It was a very small, informal wedding and we had no attendants other than two darling little flower girls who are daughters of friends of ours. Or, at least, that is what we planned. The 4 year old brother of one of the flower girls turned up at the wedding and announced that he wanted to be "FlowerMan". So, we had two flower girls and a "Flowerman" and the kids stole the show. It was great!
    I wouldn't want to be a groomswoman either. My next anything in a wedding will be Mother of the Bride. But that's a long way off. I don't even want to attend anymore weddings for a long time.
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  3. #633
    Mullet/Summer Enthusiast AshleyPSU's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    One of my best friends got married over the summer, and she had a "Bridesman" on our side with the Bridesmaids.
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    I had my brothers stand up with me at my wedding. They didn't need a title like "bridesmen" because they're my brothers, so that's what we called them. They wore tuxes like my husband's brother and his other groomsmen, and stood on my side of the alter. Neither my husband nor I have any sisters, so it was lopsided, but who really cares.
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  5. #635
    FORT Fanatic onei0091's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Mine was lopsided, too. I had my two best friends, my husband's sisters, my sisters and my daughter as bridesmaids, and my brothers and my husband's brother as groomsmen. So I guess we have more women in our lives then men. My *mother in law* couldn't stand it. She wanted me to cut my best friends out of the wedding party so it would be more even on both sides. Geez, who cares if it's even or not. That's not the point - the point is to have those near and dear to you in the wedding party. Boy was she mad.

    I have heard of what you are talking about, but haven't been to a wedding where there are men with the bridesmaids and women with the groomsmen. Usually there is a smattering of bride picked and groom picked bridesmaids and groomsmen, but they all stand together, if that makes any sense.

    What do you all think about giving a card with a gift? Do you think it's necessary or the 'proper' thing to do? If I give a gift, I usually do not buy a card to go with it. Because the gift already says I thought of the person, so a card is kind of redundant to me. But my mom gave me a hard time yesterday about it and said, 'WHY don't you ever get cards for anyone? It's weird!' Is it weird?

    I do get cards if I just got a gift certificate or I didn't get any gift for that person at all (like a b-day card sent by mail).

  6. #636
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by onei0091;3193421;
    What do you all think about giving a card with a gift? Do you think it's necessary or the 'proper' thing to do? If I give a gift, I usually do not buy a card to go with it. Because the gift already says I thought of the person, so a card is kind of redundant to me. But my mom gave me a hard time yesterday about it and said, 'WHY don't you ever get cards for anyone? It's weird!' Is it weird?

    I do get cards if I just got a gift certificate or I didn't get any gift for that person at all (like a b-day card sent by mail).
    Heh...this is one of my pet peeves. I hate birthday/anniversary/gift cards. I appreciate that they're supposed to mean that someone is thinking of me, but the only ones I like are those that my kids make for me. I think e-cards are brilliant because you get the intended message without having to deal with the waste of paper. I loved the Jerry Seinfeld bit where he was dithering over what to do with a card - how long do you keep them up? Then do you throw them out? If not, how long are you supposed to keep them for?

    My mom, on the other hand, keeps Hallmark in business. She's been known to send TWO cards to my kids for their birthdays. I don't mind the Christmas or thank-you cards that have a photo on them, because I do like seeing pictures of family and friends that I only get to see maybe once a year. I also understand the etiquette of a thank-you card and do believe in them, but I either have my kids make them and I do own a set of small blank cards that I write a personal note in when required. I never attach a card to a gift, though.
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  7. #637
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    It does make it easier for the person getting a lot of gifts to keep track of who gave what.
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    FORT Fanatic onei0091's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Maybe it's a generational thing - because my mom and grandma are card crazy and I think they are really redundant, especially if you are there, in person, with gift in hand saying, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" or anniversary or whatever. Why do they need to read a card that says, 'hi, happy birthday' when you are right there? And isn't it always awkward when the person has to sit there and read it when everyone is watching? And the person knows all eyes are on them so they just skim it really fast and say, 'aww, thanks'.

    But maybe I just don't get it.

  9. #639
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    For a wedding gift, I always stick a card with the gift so that the couple knows who it's from. It does help them keep track. For my parents and people of that generation, I also include a card with the gift. But for just about everyone else, I don't give a card with the gift.

    If I'm giving a wrapped gift for a birthday or what not, I'll usually just stick one of those decorative self-stick labels on the gift that says "to" and "from." That way, the recipient knows who gave it, but I don't have to deal with a card. I usually only give cards if I'm giving a check/gift card/cash as the gift--then the card becomes the package.

    And not for nothing, but when did cards get so freaking expensive? Even at Target it's dififcult to find a Mother's Day or birthday card for under $3 or $4!!!

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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by Lois Lane;3193706;
    For a wedding gift, I always stick a card with the gift so that the couple knows who it's from. It does help them keep track. For my parents and people of that generation, I also include a card with the gift. But for just about everyone else, I don't give a card with the gift.

    If I'm giving a wrapped gift for a birthday or what not, I'll usually just stick one of those decorative self-stick labels on the gift that says "to" and "from." That way, the recipient knows who gave it, but I don't have to deal with a card. I usually only give cards if I'm giving a check/gift card/cash as the gift--then the card becomes the package.

    And not for nothing, but when did cards get so freaking expensive? Even at Target it's dififcult to find a Mother's Day or birthday card for under $3 or $4!!!
    That's why I make my own. I invested in several stamp sets and I can stamp whatever sentiment I need for the card. Since I scrapbook too, I have tons of scrapbooking equipment and it doesn't take me long to make cards.

    I include a card with a wedding or baby gift as it does help the receipient keep track of who sent what.
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