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Thread: Etiquette Questions

  1. #421
    MRD
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by LG.;2917471;
    I think that your situation sounds like "buying two people gifts" which is a nice thing (or rather, two nice things) for you to do. Hopefully we don't need to have our intent scruntized and have "pure hearts" in order to be polite these days.
    Thanks. I got hit with several birthdays in a row so was almost in a frenzy of what to do, what to do, what to do????
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  2. #422
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    I think what you did was completely fine.

    Wedding update:

    I just got a thank you card from my brother and SIL. She thanked me profusely for making the trip out for the wedding, and for taking care of picking up our other brother and driving him everywhere. The kicker was that she also thanked me for helping clean up after the reception/dance. Remember, I said that I mostly sat on my butt and watched the band and hardly helped them at all. I maybe carried a couple of wedding gifts to the front door, folded 2 or 3 tablecloths, and packed up leftover cupcakes into boxes, but that was all I did. Anyway, she enclosed a gift card to Starbucks, so that was nice.

  3. #423
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by Marleybone;2917511;
    The kicker was that she also thanked me for helping clean up after the reception/dance. Remember, I said that I mostly sat on my butt and watched the band and hardly helped them at all. I maybe carried a couple of wedding gifts to the front door, folded 2 or 3 tablecloths, and packed up leftover cupcakes into boxes, but that was all I did. Anyway, she enclosed a gift card to Starbucks, so that was nice.
    Hee hee! Way to go! And enjoy that Starbucks gift card. You deserve it!

    OK...I don't mean to display my ignorance but here goes...why were they needing help cleaning up after a wedding? Was it in their home? If it was at a reception hall, they provide employees to do all that stuff. I know my family made sure all my gifts were dropped off at my parents house and we gave all our flowers and center pieces away, but we didn't have to deal with the tablecloths etc. Personally, I think it's tacky to expect your guests to clean up. So, a big thumbs up to you for enjoying the day and making the most of a stressful situation.

    I've seen money/card boxes. I don't think that's tacky. I think it's more secure than just leaving a card out on a gift table. I like to give checks as the wedding gift so that the couple can use that for whatever they like and like sticking that in the money/card box. BUT...having an ATM as part of the wedding...now that's tacky!

  4. #424
    FORT Fogey canadian_angel's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    mrd, you did nothing wrong at all. Thoughtful gifts for all involved. It doesn't matter who it may have potentially been intended for. It wasn't an afterthought, it was simply a mind change. Those are allowed and welcomed! You're too thoughtful for it to be a fauxpas.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marleybone;2917511;
    I think what you did was completely fine.

    Wedding update:

    I just got a thank you card from my brother and SIL. She thanked me profusely for making the trip out for the wedding, and for taking care of picking up our other brother and driving him everywhere. The kicker was that she also thanked me for helping clean up after the reception/dance. Remember, I said that I mostly sat on my butt and watched the band and hardly helped them at all. I maybe carried a couple of wedding gifts to the front door, folded 2 or 3 tablecloths, and packed up leftover cupcakes into boxes, but that was all I did. Anyway, she enclosed a gift card to Starbucks, so that was nice.
    What a turn around in attitude. I'm so glad you went and are reaping the benefits of going still!

  5. #425
    Premium Member dagwood's Avatar
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by Marleybone;2917511;
    I think what you did was completely fine.

    Wedding update:

    I just got a thank you card from my brother and SIL. She thanked me profusely for making the trip out for the wedding, and for taking care of picking up our other brother and driving him everywhere. The kicker was that she also thanked me for helping clean up after the reception/dance. Remember, I said that I mostly sat on my butt and watched the band and hardly helped them at all. I maybe carried a couple of wedding gifts to the front door, folded 2 or 3 tablecloths, and packed up leftover cupcakes into boxes, but that was all I did. Anyway, she enclosed a gift card to Starbucks, so that was nice.
    It's good to be appreciated, even for stuff you didn't do. Enjoy your Starbucks....their Pumpkin/cream cheese muffins are to die for.
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

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  6. #426
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2917463;
    If you buy a gift for a friend and then decide to give that gift to another friend, is that regifting? or alternative gifting? Is that bad?

    I bought a gift for one friend and then decided to give her something else, so I gave the first gift to another friend. The original gift was actually fairly nice and worked for both women. But I later saw something else for the first friend I liked better, so the 2nd friend got the first gift.
    No one knows about this (but you guys now)
    what you did is called normal. It's buying 2 gifts for 2 people.

  7. #427
    MRD
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Marleybone, that's great that you got such a wonderful thank you. I know it feels good to be appreciated. And free Starbucks too!

    ATM??? I'm sorry, but if I had been a guest at THAT wedding, not only would they NOT have gotten cash, but I would have been tempted to get up and leave and take any gift I might have bought home with me. That is beyond tacky. It's so beyond tacky that it makes tacky look GOOD.

    Thanks all for the reassurance. I did throw in a couple small handmade items that I had specifically made for each friend and I made the bday cards as well. They each liked what they got, so I guess it wasn't that bad.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
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  8. #428
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Quote Originally Posted by livin4reality;2917110;
    Anyone watch Rich Bride, Poor Bride? Each show they do a couple planning their wedding/day of and try to stay under budget. They have a wedding planner..seems like most of these weddings are around $30,000. Anyway, one couple yesterday had a "money box" at their reception AND RENTED AN ATM. I kid you not. AND stuck some bows on it.
    You ARE kidding, right? A money box and RENTED AN ATM????? Get everyone soused and hope they empty their bank accounts.

  9. #429
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    WHAT?! Who rents an ATM for a wedding?!??!! That is insane!

  10. #430
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    Re: Etiquette Questions

    Insane people, that's who! I find that to be so utterly tacky. That better not be something that's becoming the norm. I haven't been to a wedding in ages, but will apparently be going to one this summer. If it's anything like I'm hearing, I'm in for a disappointing day.

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