Losing a Mom

It has been a tough day as was yesterday when we laid her to rest. We were at her house today sorting through her stuff and we laughed about all her things and that she was probably watching us and laughing that we had to go through it but yet it makes it so final. She was the glue that held it all together.

My mom always wanted one of her quilts draped on her casket and we did that and I didn't realize til after it was all over that the blouse we picked out to bury her in had butterflies on it and her quilt was butterflies.

Nennie, that is very sweet. You did a good job honoring your mom. I know it is hard to go through your mom's stuff, but at the same time, it could give you comfort and also spur on some stories from the memories of things that you discover.

I remember going through my mom's stuff. I found letters that I had written her in every drawer that she had. Even her underwear drawer, which was a tough one for me to go through and clean out. I love having things from her in my drawers now...

Nennie, I hope that you can get through these tough days with some nice memories of your time with your mom. And some stories that you may want to share with us! My thoughts are with you... :cheek

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Originally Posted by Cootie

Nennie, that is very sweet. You did a good job honoring your mom. I know it is hard to go through your mom's stuff, but at the same time, it could give you comfort and also spur on some stories from the memories of things that you discover.

I remember going through my mom's stuff. I found letters that I had written her in every drawer that she had. Even her underwear drawer, which was a tough one for me to go through and clean out. I love having things from her in my drawers now...

Nennie, I hope that you can get through these tough days with some nice memories of your time with your mom. And some stories that you may want to share with us! My thoughts are with you... :cheek

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Thank you. My mom was such a prankster and there are many stories I can share. There was seven of us kids and there are still six living and we have had so many laughs at stuff she has done over the years these last few days.

We have had hospice the last three weeks and they wanted to know a lot about mom and we were able to tell lots of stories about her life. I think the greatest story I have told is that she was so loved by her family and that when her mom died at an early age she took over the role being mom to her brothers and sisters. She was the spitting image of her mom and I think that her siblings saw their mom in her. My mom also was like her in that she was a nurturer and babied all of them. She passed that down to their kids also and at her funeral almost all of her nieces and nephews that are in the area were there.

Today has been rough. It would have been my Mom's birthday. She loved to cook a big Italian feast for others on her birthday. She would hover over people and feed them until they were full then make a dish for herself after everyone had eaten. You could beg her to sit and eat but she wouldn't. Today also would have been my daughter's first anniversary w/her boyfriend. They are both very much on my mind today. ♥

She sounds like my grandmother was. Both your mother and daughter are there with you today. Namaste my good friend.

I lost my mom to cancer when I was 28. She never knew my husband or 6 of her 9 grandchildren. What got me through that time was focusing on the fact that I'd been lucky to have had her for 28 years...many are denied even that. So instead of thinking of what I no longer had in my life, shifting that focus got me through.

It's funny, but of all of the holiday and annual "firsts" without her - the hardest wasn't Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mothers Day (which I ignored) or her birthday - it was on my birthday. I cried like a, well, baby. It hit me that that was the first birthday in my entire life she wasn't with me here on earth.

It's been a long, long time ago. It only hurts when I think about it, which I try not to do. I've only been to her grave twice since she died, the last time about 15 years ago. Don't plan to go back, she's not there.

Of all of the things people say to you after your mother dies, I've forgotten them all except this that someone I worked with said to me: "You've lost the best friend you'll ever have." But life goes on. Now I have my children, and when I die (which I hope and pray will be before any one of them), I hope they can remember what we've shared together, but move on with their lives, not looking backwards lest they stumble, but looking forward knowing they were deeply loved.

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Originally Posted by buglover

She sounds like my grandmother was. Both your mother and daughter are there with you today. Namaste my good friend.

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Thanks friend.....your call meant the world to me. :grouphug to all who are missing someone.

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Originally Posted by Bunny555

Today has been rough. It would have been my Mom's birthday. She loved to cook a big Italian feast for others on her birthday. She would hover over people and feed them until they were full then make a dish for herself after everyone had eaten. You could beg her to sit and eat but she wouldn't. Today also would have been my daughter's first anniversary w/her boyfriend. They are both very much on my mind today. ♥

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And you are still in my thoughts and my prayers, Bunny.

I was sent this email this morning and my mom had alzheimers and this is something I could have seen her doing. We would have laughed and did the same thing.

Tough getting old



A little silver-haired lady calls her neighbor

and says, "Please come over here and help me. I

have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure

out how to get started." Her neighbor asks,

"What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The little silver haired lady says,

"According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her neighbor decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the

puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces

for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going

to be able to assemble these pieces into anything

resembling a rooster." He takes her hand and says,

"Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup

of tea, and then," he said with a deep sigh ............

"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

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Originally Posted by nennie

I was sent this email this morning and my mom had alzheimers and this is something I could have seen her doing. We would have laughed and did the same thing....

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For all us dealing with or who have dealt with those with Alzheimers and/or senility, we thank you! I can see it, too :D
:props