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Thread: Cutest things you've heard your kids say

  1. #171
    Resident curmudgeon Newfherder's Avatar
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    When my ex-wife's little girl was 18 months, she was "helping" me wash walls in my kitchen. I started singing one of my favorite arias, and she stuck her sponge in my mouth. A little later, I started singing again, and she put the sponge back in my mouth. Later still, I started singing again, and this time, since she didn't have a sponge, she pinched my lips together. She's now nearly four, and the other day when I started singing, she told me to put a sock in it Her twin brother will usually just put his hand up to my mouth, but if I persist, he'll say, "Stop singing, Honey!"
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  2. #172
    Who Dat lildago's Avatar
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    My daughter was playing with her food (throwing corn) and got a stern talking-to about it. She sat quietly hearing me out. When I was done, she asked, "How come when I'm in trouble and you're upset with me, your voice sounds different than the regular voice?"
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  3. #173
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
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    a little background- one of our rituals here is to sing the ABC song while you lather your hands (handwashing) it takes aprox 39 seconds - the time needed to kill germs and bacteria. so blah blah blah

    I was in the bathroom helping one of the 2 yr olds wash up and he starts singing.. a b c d e f g h i j k ELMO peeeeeeeeeeeeee.
    I started laughing so hard! I said Danny? does Elmo help you wash your hands? His face split into a huge grin.

    Kids always seem to have trouble with l m n o p but thats the cutest substitution I've heard in a while.
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

  4. #174
    MRD
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    When my daughter was five, she had a friend over and she comes running out of her room to tell me that the friend said the "F" word. I was in shock and couldn't think of anything to say when she says (standing there with hands on her hips): "That's right, she said FART!"

    I was so relieved and later laughed my butt off about it.


    My niece had a little lisp when she was young and her older brothers found out she couldn't say the word truck, so they would go around saying to her: Robin, say Truck. Of course, that's not how it sounded out of her mouth. When my sister found out, she washed their mouths out with soap!
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
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  5. #175
    Premium Member DesertRose's Avatar
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    My mother was putting my 16-month old son down for a nap (she babysits him) and they were going through the ritual of naming the teddy bears in his crib. One is mommy, the other daddy and the last one is baby Anthony. Well today my mom introduced him to teddy Baby S., his future cousin. My son took him and threw him out of the crib . I think I better get him used to not being the only baby in the family.

  6. #176
    Wishing for spring Mellon's Avatar
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    Awww, that's adorable DesertRose! They don't handle competition well, do they?

    Here's a little story I thought y'all would get a kick out of. I was about 8, so my brother was 6 at the time. We were sitting around the kitchen table eating dinner with my parents and my brother looked up from his plate and very seriously said "Dad, what's 'rape'?"

    My dad cleared his throat, pondered the question for a moment, and started into an explanation that could paint a soft portrait of rape for an 8 & 6 year old. I already knew what it was from school, and being an "old" 8 year old, I was always around the adults & figured things out very quickly. I sat and watched wondering just how my dad was going to explain this... Anyway, my brother's eyes keep getting wider and wider as my dad goes on with his explanation (my dad was always longwinded) and finally shakes his head and says "Dad, I don't know what you're talking about, but 'rape' is just 'GRAPE' without the 'G'!" We nearly died with laughter... priceless memory

    Buffy: What is this?
    Willow: A doodle. I do doodle. You too. You do doodle, too. ("Gingerbread")

    Xander: Damn it! You know what? I'm sick of this crap. I'm sick of being the guy who eats insects and gets the funny syphilis. As of this moment, it's over. I'm finished being everybody's butt monkey! ("Buffy vs. Dracula")

  7. #177
    Just Forting Around roseskid's Avatar
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    Mellon, that's one of those stories no one could see coming.

    When my daughter was little, she was doing her homework as Mr. Rose and I were in the kitchen preparing dinner. She asked what an orgasm was, and as we were stammering, and stuttering, she said, "oh, wait, I read it wrong...I meant what's an organism?"
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  8. #178
    giz
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    My little guy saw someone he recognised when we were driving the other day. He said "Mum, mum! I just saw Sage out of the glimpse of my eye!" I love how he puts things.

  9. #179
    Premium Member burntbrat's Avatar
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    A few weeks ago my husband and five-year-old son were playing rock-paper-scissors to settle something at the dinner table. They do one, two, three... my husband shoots rock. My son has his hands up in the air and to the sides, kind of like a waiter carrying two trays. We were all a little confused when my son says, "I am the Lord. The Lord beats everything." Ha!

    Also, my most embarrassing moment when I was a kid was around the time that anatomically correct dolls were all the rage. We were driving home one night and I explained to my mother that one of my friends had a doll with a c---. She almost crashed the car and had to pull over while she and my sister composed themselves, asked where I'd heard that word, and then explained the proper word and how that word was never to be uttered again. Proud, proud day.

  10. #180
    FORT Fogey Muduh's Avatar
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    My son told me that last night a friend of his, and her daughter were at his house. The kid snapped some answer at the girl and the girl said that he was rude. The kid then apologized and explained that he had had a "trying" day at school and was very tired. If this occurs in Mother's Day Out, what must we look forward to in kindergarten?

    My older son, who is now in his mid forties, has loved speed from the day he was born. He's had the speeding tickets to prove it, by the way. Anyway, when he was about three years old we were going somewhere and my husband sort of raced the engine. Our little boy smiled real big and said "door floored it, Daddy". We laugh about that frequently.

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