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One of the earliest visits- MIL helped paint our living room. When she left she said "At least now I know my grandchild will have ONE clean room to play in!" WTF?!?! Granted, I'm not Mr. Clean, but I didn't deserve THAT!!
That is how our relationship has always been- she makes little comments on the way that I do things (how I raise my kids, run the house, live my life).
hepcat & chickngirl, I read your bits about 3 times (I kept leaving and coming back) and had to say thank you! We all have our days and time when things just don't add up. It's a shame that these "ladies" don't have anything better to do than be negative. I guess be thankful that they don't live with you 24-7.
She sounds just like mine used to be. My MIL would hand my husband $50 and then say "this is for fuel for your furnace so you don't let the baby get cold." As if we would do that. Then, when I was having trouble getting my first baby to nurse (I'm probably the only mother who sat in a La Leche meeting and bottle fed my baby.Originally Posted by Chickngirl;2155009;
) my MIL said to me; "Well. You must be a beef cow instead of a dairy cow."
I do get along with my in-laws pretty much all the time, they're nice people and we get along. However (you knew this was coming right) I sometimes get a bit annoyed at my youngest SIL.
She's three years younger than me and live about 200 metres from me and Mr. Fatale so when we go visit the in-laws (who live 1.5 hours away) she comes with us. She goes up to them and stays there for the entire summers and Christmas breaks from college so she always have loads of stuff. She always wait until the last minute to pack (even though she always knows when we're going home). Then she puts all of her things in the garage and we start packing the car. As she waited until the last minute she must go check everything and then comes out just in time for us to have carried out all the things to the car, so she doesn't have to help at all.
Sometimes mr. Fatale has put his foot down and said that she can only bring what she can carry from our flat to hers, but then the rest of the family thinks we're mean. Well they're not the ones who have to do anything!
The last drop, for me (after which I started dropping hints to Mr. Fatale) was when we had to take loads of stuff, she had been at her parents' the entire summer and she got a new computer with a non-flat screen as well. Our car was filled - and she didn't go with us. So we had to carry everything from our car to our place, loads of things, and we she came home she asked if we could help her take it home, either via car or by carrying. We said no and told her that she could come by and take the things home herself.
She is a nice person but things like this makes me go aaargh!!
I don't mean to laugh at you Marley, but that is just such a funny image! I always thought breast feeding came naturally to everyone, but a few of my friends tried and tried and couldn't get it to work for them--so they went to the bottle (and got tons of grief from people who told them they HAD to breastfeed).
Ohhh dear. How do we get so lucky eh?
My mother in law is the queen of candy coated insults and sing song-y jabs.
It doesn't matter what the case may be, she just finds a way to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. And for someone who was a teacher of second and third graders for years and years, Her writing style, and table manners are both DEPLORABLE! She is forever talking with her mouth full while smacking her food... and constantly asking me questions as soon as I put food in my mouth. Last night at dinner I got so fed up that every time she would do it, I would give her a cold steely stare while I very deliberately finished chewing my bite and swallowed. Then I would answer whatever it was. But of course, by then she had usually moved on to blabbing about something else.. That's another thing about my wonderful Mother in law, she asks a ton of questions, but it's a rare occasion when she shuts her trap long enough for you to answer one. And if you do, she's already making it obvious that she has no intention of listening to your answer anyway. So why bother asking?
My MIL and FIL drive me and my husband nuts. They call me once a week and ask how the kids are and a whole bunch of questions and then they call Hubby. Now Hubby is a long haul truck-driver, and we talk on the phone at least twice a day. We keep each other up to date on pretty much everything going on. So they call him and ask him the exact same questions and I guess compare answers. Annoying isn't even the word for it.
Now that my step-daughter has had her first baby they call her every week and tell her she is doing it all wrong. First she should not have taken pictures of the baby in the hospital because we had to use flash for lighting. Then she should not use a pacifier because their doctor told them it wasn't good for the baby. Now they are saying that the baby should only leave the house for doctors appointments until she is 3 months old.
Have I mentions that the last baby they had was over 41 years ago? So much has changed and when she tells them that they then call me or Hubby and tell us that she doesn't love them because she is not taking their advice. Usually they get her so upset she calls me to talk and calm down. I want so bad to tell them that upsetting a new first time mother is grounds for intense dislike on my and her and both husbands parts.
We all recently found out for a aunt that they go around behind our backs and bad mouth us to the rest of the family. Hubby has now started avoiding their calls because he says that talking to them give him an instant head ache and makes his heart beat so fast and hard he gets light headed sometimes. I think we are just going to cut them out of our lives.
By the wayClosetNerd my MIL does the sweet insult too. I just smile and say under my breath, just remember I get to pick your nursing home later on.
That is just so sad. I know how difficult it was for my friends emotionally NOT to be able to breastfeed their babies. But the children are healthy and strong and smart -- and not being breasfed didn't hurt them one bit! Why would a family member go out of their way to make you feel badly about something you can't help?
catmom3, all I can say is...My goodness--new moms are already so tired and dealing with hormonal changes. To upset her like that is just cruel.
Unless you know someone is abusing their child, for pete's sake, just leave the parents be to raise them in the manner they see fit!
Luckily I avoided most of the MIL problems which was good since I had two of them, the MIL and the StepMIL. Neither one caused me much problems, it was mr. gracie that took the shots plus having to deal with his MIL. She's the corker. My brothers have all moved away so their wives don't have to deal with her and recently my sister did the same thing. That should have given her the hint.
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