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Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #8681
    Resident curmudgeon Newfherder's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by ScoutMom;3030135;
    Why is it always the boys that do stupid stuff like that? My son is doing well this year, but he could still do better. He just doesn't study! He's smart enough that he can get Bs without having to study, so that's what he does. I keep telling him he could get As if he'd just study a little bit. He keeps telling me that Bs mean he is "average". He said "average is good". I counter with "average is great if that's the best you can do, but it's not". I really think it's a boy thing. My friends at work say the same things about their sons, but not their daughters. They refuse to listen to parents - they just have to make (and hopefully learn from) their own mistakes. I hope things work out OK, buglover.
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    FORT Fogey ScoutMom's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I only have a son, but have friends/co-workers that have both sons and daughters. From talking to them, it seems to be much more common among boys. But then again, maybe these people just have smarter daughters than average!

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    Got wings 9/19/2012 buglover's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I think that having boys is easier emotionally because I was a horrible daughter in my teenage years!! I fought with my mom non-stop and just didn't listen to anything she said. My son is merely lazy. He moves very slowly and doesn't follow direction very well until you give him the look of death...but at least he doesn't scream in my face the way I did to my mother and my friend's daughters have done to them.
    Yup, with donuts!!

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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I have to agree with Newf. I didn't think any of us would survive my daughter's 7th grade year. Same thing, could do the work, just didn't. Laziness.
    And I heard that argument about average too and I told her I didn't buy it.
    She had already proved she was capable of making straight A's so I said that if she could do it for 6 years, she could still do it. Had she been an "average" student all along, then her argument would fly, but as she hadn't, it didn't.

    And my daughter isn't the only one. I've had friends with daughters that pulled the same thing. And I'm raising my hand here too. I was guilty of it both in 8th grade and 12th grade. Just decided that I wasn't going to do it, I was bored, it wasn't important, yada, yada, yada. My mother yanked a knot in my tail both times and I brought up the grades.

    But I don't think it's just a boy thing. I've had my own experiences and seen friends with the same with their girls AND boys.

    Sorry you guys are having to go through this. It sucks, but it does get better.
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  5. #8685
    Over and Out! Bunny555's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Do your children's schools post grades to Edline or some other grade-posting website? I feel that I can stay more on top of what's going on with my kids' grades now that I can see weekly grades and teacher comments online. The thing that kills me is when I see that grades (my sons especially) have gone down because of missing work that he either forgot about or was too lazy to do.

  6. #8686
    FORT Fogey veejer's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Push for your school district to get an online grade book like Progress Book. ProgressBook | Classroom Management Software | Student Progress Reporting | Parent Communications

    I know there are other systems, but this is what my district has been using for at least three years. It may seem a little "Big Brother-ish" at first, but we are their parents!!!!

    You can see every grade as it is posted and whether an assignment is missing. Fortunately I haven't had too many problems with either my son or daughter, but I have a friend whose son drives her nuts with the missing homework that he did at home but just didn't bother to turn in to the teacher.

    eta: Great minds, Bunny555!!!
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    Got wings 9/19/2012 buglover's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    We have a parent site through the school where we can monitor his progress throughout the year. It's a great tool, it's just getting him to pull up his assignments that takes effort. I can yell and take away everything but he's almost 16 and really needs to figure out that things have to get done without someone telling him constantly. It's the same way with his chores.... 3 little chores and I still have to remind him nearly everyday!
    Yup, with donuts!!

  8. #8688
    Team DAN schmoo2's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    yeah, my son went thorugh that. Not trying too hard in high school. He didn't do bad, but didn't do his potential either.
    Took him a year in college to find what he wanted to do also - then got going - great grades, teacher assistant, great participation and referrals from the professors.
    got his BA and tried to go for his PhD directly. what kept him from going to the places he wanted to - High school grades and participation.
    so he stayed at the same place and got his Master's - and tried again for the PhD. same problems. He is going to an excellent college for it - but definitely not the ones he would have preferred.
    I know someone told us it doesn't really matter where you get your degree (as long as reputable), it matters what you do with it. but if you can't get where you want to be cause of HS, you really need to think about it before you get to college. stupid permanent records. /rant

    PS from mom. of course, he wanted Berkley first. ended up in Cleveland. personally, I like the proximity and living costs a lot better in Cleveland.

  9. #8689
    FORT Fogey livin4reality's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Our school is supposed to send progress reports via email and I only got one for this semester. A breakdown in communication.

    He's been moping around the house all day. We did work on painting the house and that will keep us busy for awhile. He is really scared the school won't let him participate fully in band/choir next year..his last. But here is his punishment: and tell me if you think it is too much/little

    1) Study ACT every day. (he is taking it in a couple weeks)
    2) We are looking into virtuil school info for retaking this class..
    3) His X-box has been put away for the summer
    4) His social life has been curtailed. Only allowed to basketball w/ friends 2 hours.
    5) internet use only for school/ACT/college and email.
    6) 5 page paper on good study habits.
    7) he also has to find a job ASAP. We've stopped giving him gas money and he is really feeling the pinch on that. So funny to hear him say to his sister.."Do you know how much gas that will burn up if I drop you off there?"

    DD who just finished 8th grade is starting to be a bit of concern. She brought up a couple of grades that were a concern, but the others she was doing well in dropped! Shes got a paper due on study habits as well.

    Honestly, and I've told both them this. We've always expected them to go to college. But if they find something else to do that they love, it is fine with me. I just want them to be productive, happy members of society.
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  10. #8690
    FORT Fogey Ellen's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I wonder if it's a cultural thing sometimes. I have several boy students -- 2nd - 5th grade -- all Korean. They work hard, take on extra projects (even for "just tutoring" and no grades), and are already talking (excitedly) about when they can study at Harvard, MIT, CalTech, Yale, etc.

    As for me? Nope, not Asian. I grew up in Milwaukee -- Polish-American. I was NEVER satisfied with B+ or even A-. If I got any less than an A, I had my nose in my books and asked my teachers for extra help, etc., until I got those grades up. (Did I have a 4.0? First in my class? Nope -- 3.85 and top 10. But not for lack of trying.) So with students, I don't put up with laziness. (And the parents back me up -- they know I have a waiting list!)
    Last edited by Ellen; 05-30-2008 at 07:41 PM.
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