FORT Koffee Klatch

mrd, you should make the decision that works best in your own mind, but if you otherwise like these people, then you shouldn't let places intimidate you. If the people make you uncomfortable with supercilious attitudes, that's one thing, but a house is just a house. And if yours is clean, there is no reason why you should feel uncomfortable having these people over. If any of them have a problem discussing literature in something less grandiose then a mansion, then that's their issue, not yours.

MRD, you know those people put their pants on one leg at a time. I would continue to go as long as you like the club, and you like the people. I know how you feel, as we have some friends that really made it big, and their house/possessions are way beyond our means. However, I have discussed it with the wife (who is now one of my really good friends) and you know what, they started out the same as we did, with student loans, rickety cars etc. She has very few friends because of the "money issue" but we share a similar sense of humour and I am probably one of the few people who will be honest with her and see beyond "the stuff". You could host at your house, and if the people are worth their salt it just won't matter, they will like you for you. If you feel this is not the case, well that is a different thing. I understand how you feel though, and it took me a while to get over similar feelings. They are happy to come to our much more modest house because we are true friends, and if they lost everything tomorrow we would still be friends. I am sure you have a lovely home and only a snob would not want to meet Waldo ;)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by MamaC;2946450;

Hubby is coming home tomorrow night from a business trip. I had soooo many plans to really do a number on the house...spring cleaning, maybe getting to some flower beds. Stuff like that.

Well the first day, I drove him to the airport at 5 a.m. and after coming home and getting daughter up and out of the house for school, reading the paper and having my breakfast, all I did was some laundry and took a nap!

Second day, I watched my granddaughter for a couple of hours and deliberately did not start any projects.

Third day, I did a load of dishes in the dishwasher and my other daughter came up and dyed my hair.

Today I went grocery shopping and mopped the kitchen floor.

I pick him up at the airport at 6:30 Friday night and have some serious doubts that I am going to clean the entire kitchen, rearrange/straighten out the pantry and fridge; clean up the family room of toys left scattered about by the granddaughter and dog; change the sheets, clean up the guest room (again that granddaughter had a field day playing in!); and cleaning the three bathrooms!

I will have the laundry put away before I leave for the airport though.

He won't dare say it, but I know he will be thinking, "Just WTH did you do while I was gone???"

---

I understand what you are saying, BUT answer this question! Will all of that crap that you did not do be there for you to do when you get around to it??? What would you have preferred to have given up?? The time with your granddaughter? The time with your daughter?? The time for yourself?? There is food in the house...there are clean dishes to eat from...your nerves are pretty settled, I'll bet....and "Hey-la-day-la your boyfriend's back!" I think you are ahead of the game. I"ve never known anyone on their deathbeds to say, "I wish I had worked more, I wish I had cleaned more."


mrd, if you have a turn to host the book club, hold your head up, and make it a charming entertainment event....on the level that you can afford. People who want to look down their noses won't show up. Don't deprive yourself of something that you really love because of "stuff" that can be taken away from anyone at a moment's notice. Pressure comes with having a lot of "stuff" and, who knows, it may be a truly miserable household that is masquerading behind the "stuff". Be proud of what you have and what you have in your head. We can all tell that you are good at making people comfortable in your home. You'd be surprised at how many "rich" people really enjoy just being part of the regular gang. You have a lot to offer. You wouldn't have been invited in if they were only interested in how you lived. YOU CAN DO IT! They should be honored to be invited into your home, since most people would probably be hesitant to invite them. Simple food, simple surroundings, good company. Can't beat it! :nod

Ana B, text Mr. Director back and ask him what would be a good gift! He should know, and he's a guy! I'm sure you've already made a decision about this...but I read this late. Good Luck! :up

I guess I'm in suggestion mode today, huh? :lol :confused

mrd, I concur with what everyone else has been saying. If it's simply the house than don't let that get you bogged down. That's just secondary to why you're there. If it's the people or the books or anything and you really don't enjoy those aspects than maybe you may want to give it one more chance before declining further offers. But it sounds like a really good atmosphere and that it's a place you enjoy. So I recommend sticking it through!!!

Ana B, I think a simple little gift basket of his favourite goodies would go over huge!! But a little basket and fill it with a few of his favourite chocolates, chocolate bars, and goodies. Wrap it with a little actors ribbon or something and voila!

Thanks all for your advice. I've thought about it and they wouldn't have invited me if they hadn't wanted me there. And everyone was very lovely, so I may give it another try and see if I can find a way not to be blown away by the house and obvious money.
We all share the same interests, so it could be fun and heck, I'm making contacts right?

Now for the next problem. We are now the proud owners of a drum kit. Friends of my daughter are moving and don't have room for it, so we are keeping it for them. It's been set up for a grand total of 30 min. and I'm already about to LOSE MY MIND! :lol
I said yes because I have secretly wanted to learn to play the drums for years, but having someone else play them in my house is hugely annoying. Maybe if I go give it a try it might be different.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2947397;

I said yes because I have secretly wanted to learn to play the drums for years, but having someone else play them in my house is hugely annoying.

---

I've been married to a drummer for over twenty years. You get used to it.

Ana B, we gave everyone in the cast flowers. The boys appreciated it as much as the girls did. There wasn't a need to differentiate between the sexes here.

MRD - I'm a little late weighing in on this situation, but I agree that you shouldn't let someone's house or wealth stop you from joing a book club and spending time with people that you enjoy. If you don't feel that you have room for them in your house (or don't want Waldo goosing them), then you could always host a meeting somewhere else. Maybe the museum has a room that you could use? I think everyone who has ever read the recipe thread or received one of your lovely cards knows what a lovely, creative hostess you are. I'm sure that anyone who was invited to one of your functions, no matter where it was held, would have a blast! :) Having said that, want to give me some ideas (or better yet come here and SAVE ME) next week when my new in-laws will be here for a long weekend and meeting my parents for the first time? :)

doxie - hahahahahahahahaha!:laugh Sorry, but you win the prize. Hoo boy, glad I'm not in your shoes. Can't wait to hear all about it. Start meditating now. Get Oprah's private number and have her coach you on being your authentic self here in the now connected with the spirit (or whatever). :laugh And MRD - I'm with everyone on the "go for it!" side. When it's your turn to host, do yourself proud. If they're snobs, it will give them reason to feel good about their possessions and if they're friend-worthy, they'll appreciate your cooking, free-spirited, animal-loving family home. Seriously.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2947397;

Thanks all for your advice. I've thought about it and they wouldn't have invited me if they hadn't wanted me there. And everyone was very lovely, so I may give it another try and see if I can find a way not to be blown away by the house and obvious money.
We all share the same interests, so it could be fun and heck, I'm making contacts right?
.

---

I'm glad you changed your mind--I was going to post in here just about the same as everyone else. It's only a house! Go and have fun! You'll get over it.

I remember the last time I felt 'that way". I booked a vacation at an Arizona ranch, but not one of those where the focus is more on spas and so forth, it was a real ranch. So when I got there I was kind of surprised to find that he clientele was not (to me anyway!) mostly middle class average Joes, and that all the meals were eaten at long tables all together. It was winter, and apart from several couples of obviously comfortable retirees, there was a psychiatrist/professor, a couple of attorneys, an astronomer (!) and a whole family of doctors--cardiologists from Miami. As it turned out, the psychiatrist liked to play his guitar and sing cowboy songs (badly!) at niight, the astonomer invited everyone to have a star gazing party one night with a big telescope, and everything went just fine. And you would be surprised at how many of these 'highfalutin' folks were really intrigued when they found out what I do, and wanted to know all about it!