+ Reply to Thread
Like Tree5843Likes

Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #5841
    Anarchist AJane's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Charming
    Posts
    9,353

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Right now, I have the following items to sell for fundraisers for my kids' assorted activities:

    8 waterpark tickets
    20 raffle tickets
    1 dozen dogtags
    1 dozen assorted beaded bracelets and zipper pulls

    Next month I will be getting order sheets to sell cookie dough. Oh, and there's also a bottle drive coming up that I've been saving my recycling for. Since we have no family here, and I refuse to take any of this crap to my work, our sales are not that great.

    Lois, just say no. It gets easier the more times you say it. There is the odd item I like and I will buy it from the hordes of people who want to sell me crap, but if they get pushy, I tell 'em flat out that I don't have money to spend on stuff I don't want or need. And don't let yourself be manipulated by parents who send their cute little kids to your door. I've told parents flat out that I spend enough buying my own kids' fundraising crap.
    All my life, I have felt destiny tugging at my sleeve.~ Thursday Next
    I don't want to "go with the flow". The flow just washes you down the drain. I want to fight the flow.- Henry Rollins
    All this spiritual talk is great and everything...but at the end of the day, there's nothing like a pair of skinny jeans. - Jillian Michaels

  2. #5842
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    My problem right now is that I broke a Pampered Chef pan several months ago. I love PC stones. But I have not replaced the pan even though I used it almost daily because I don't want to have to deal with any of the PC people about hosting a party. I just want a new pan and NOTHING else.

    So even with my good tips and saying no, I've just avoided any situation where I would have to deal with the sales, just cause it is a bother. I've looked at a couple cooking shops around town to see if I could find another stone pan, but no one else seems to sell them.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  3. #5843
    Wait, what? ArchieComic Fan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    The Farm
    Posts
    4,703

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    The family and friends of mine who participate in walk-a-thons such as American Heart, Breast Cancer Awareness, or for the Humane Society, etc. know that they can usually count on me for at least a small donation. But they know that I won't attend parties for whatever wares they are selling and I don't buy gift wrap, candy, etc. for school fundraisers. I don't buy doughnuts when I see whatever group selling them outside the grocery stores. My stance is that I don't need the sugar and I could just donate (if I have the money) but then I'm encouraging them to sell foods that aren't healthy. I don't even buy girl scout cookies anymore. Not that they aren't good, but they keep going up in price and I still don't need the calories.

    Lois, you really have to learn to say no (). You are a kind, generous person and I read with interest about your mother-in-laws odd behavior and how you had a hard time dealing with it. But the only person who can change things is you and the first step(s) is not only learning how to say no but to mean it and not feel guilty about it. If it's not a product you are interested in, just say no and if they push, I think mrd's suggestion is perfect. I have no problem telling people our finances are strictly budgeted and x item is not in our budget although I wish you well in your sales. It's really not even anyone's business if it's in my budget or not. It just depends on who I'm saying no to and if I feel they should get a little extra explanation.

    As gabriel said, it does get easier to say no the more you do it. You just have to start doing it!

  4. #5844
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    It does get easier to say no. But also, part of me has that inbred Southern graciousness. My husband says that my southern accent really gets deep as I go into my speil: "Gosh, ah'm SO flattered ya'll thought of me, but ya'll, it just breaks mah heart that ah just can't right now. Ah'm sure ya'll understand." Maybe its the accent. I can give lessons.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  5. #5845
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Right behind you
    Posts
    5,063

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    You guys are all right (and alright! ), you course. I do need to be more firm in dealing with people. My MIL is a difficult one 'cause I really have a hard time being aggressive back to senior citizens--it just goes against everything I've been taught. But you're right--I can be forthright with her and just let her know that she is doing unacceptable things and I will NOT stand for her. I almost wish she were here so I could test it out. ALMOST, I said!

    I also realize that I tend to give people explanations as to WHY I'm not going to buy their stuff and that just opens up more dialogue for them to come after me. I just need to print out these short, concise and polite responses and SAY them!

    I think one of the reasons Mr. Lane and I get hit up so often is we have no kids, so people think we have oodles of money to spend on all this crap. It is funny 'cause if Mr. Lane is at the door when people come by, he'll just say "no" and no one ever bothers him. For all the reasons you all said--he's firm about it. I'm all wishy washy...

    One of the little brats, er, neighbor kids was selling stuff door to door with her brother and I said, "No thanks, I don't have any money on me," and she said, "Oh, you can write a check." See, I left myself open for that. If I had just said, "No thanks. Now run home and bother your parents," it would've been different. (I actually don't begrudge most of the little kids--but this girl is a piece of work who makes fun on other little kids to their faces...so I'm not a big fan of her's...).

    This year, we really upped our donations to charities and I don't mind doing that. It actually makes me feel good.

    So, in 2008, I will NOT allow myself to buy crap just 'cause I don't want to hurt someone's feelings... And that'll give me extra money to donate to charities that I think are truly worthy...

  6. #5846
    Miz Smarty Britches queenb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    running for the border
    Age
    53
    Posts
    6,776

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by Lois Lane;2706042;
    I think one of the reasons Mr. Lane and I get hit up so often is we have no kids, so people think we have oodles of money to spend on all this crap. It is funny 'cause if Mr. Lane is at the door when people come by, he'll just say "no" and no one ever bothers him. For all the reasons you all said--he's firm about it. I'm all wishy washy...

    .
    One of my neighbor kids actually told me "mama said you would probably buy from us because you don't have any children".
    I think if they told me I could write a check, I'd just say I didn't use them any more.
    In any case, I used to always break down and buy something, but this fall, I swore off of it. I just don't want to buy ten dollars worth of useless things, twice a month, from four or five different kids. Half the time, the items never did get here even when I did order them.
    Every time I say "NO" it gets easier, by the way!
    I have found the Truth and it doesn't make sense.

  7. #5847
    addicted MamaC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NY
    Age
    58
    Posts
    2,494

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2705872;
    My problem right now is that I broke a Pampered Chef pan several months ago. I love PC stones. But I have not replaced the pan even though I used it almost daily because I don't want to have to deal with any of the PC people about hosting a party. I just want a new pan and NOTHING else.

    So even with my good tips and saying no, I've just avoided any situation where I would have to deal with the sales, just cause it is a bother. I've looked at a couple cooking shops around town to see if I could find another stone pan, but no one else seems to sell them.
    MRD, there are a lot of Pampered Chef items for sale on EBay. That's where I would go to look for a replacement. No parties to attend, and no pressure to buy more than I need to or want to. Sure, some of the items are used but in great condition but I think most are brand new, never used. It will say whether it is brand new or not in the description.

  8. #5848
    Amethyst YetiSports7 - Snowboard FreeRide Champion Amy Lee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    whatever
    Age
    30
    Posts
    6,070

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Just trying to help you, Lois. Jusy say no! There. that felt good didnt it?
    Kiss me, ki-ki-kiss me
    Infect me with your love and Fill me with your poison...

  9. #5849
    Trouble in my life just1paul's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    In Ms. Troubles life and apartment
    Age
    56
    Posts
    9,544

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    For me it usually goes like this:
    Kid (or Adult): I'm selling these items so I (or little Susie here) can win enough points to go to Russia for a field trip - they only cost $$$.

    Me:Sorry but I am not interested, have a nice day. (closes door, or hangs up phone)
    - The Dean Martin Show -

    Petula Clark: You know they say you can't buy happiness.
    Dean Martin: No but you can pour it..

  10. #5850
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893

    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Lois,

    I was taught to respect my elders too. But with your MIL, I think that no matter how you were brought up, no matter what rules you were taught, she has NO respect for you or she wouldn't treat you this way. In that case, that negates any of the rules you were brought up by. Do you think your parents would want you to be spanked by her? No, had they had the foresight during your formative years, they probably would have added a caveat to the "respect your elders" teachings.

    Respect your elders, except when they are treating you badly. Then you have the right to stand up to them.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

+ Reply to Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.