THanks everyone. I appreciate everyone's comments and you guys have some great advice. I was just shocked and wanted to know if I was just taking it pesonally.
PGM, its not a reward event it's really a social event. It's a woman's event that is held monthly. Everyone brings a dish or drinks, so its not lack of funding either as we all share in the meal.
It's just the one woman and maybe one or two of her friends. I am going to have a word with the head of Pres. Women who is super friendly and discreet and ask her what she thinks. And here is the weird thing. I was invited to this group before we became members. We were attending church, but had not joined yet. So it's just strange that they'd want to exclude anyone. Personally I have never really gotten along with this woman. We are polite, but we've never "hit it off" and she is very standoffish to me. Makes me wonder if she's worried about what kind of "friends" I have.
We love this church and everyone else has been super friendly and supportive, but as with anything, there is a small "elite" group that think they're in charge and I'm reasonably sure that its a combo of all this.
SRS, I am appalled at what was done to your sister and nephew. If the minister had a problem with it, he should have taken it up with your sister in private and not during the ceremony. I may be wrong, but isn't a dedication ceremony where the parents pledge to bring the child up in good faith and as a Christian, bringing him to church and sunday school? We have infant baptism, and that's basically what we have to do and from what little I know about dedications, I'm thinking its similar to promise to teach the child and bring him up in the church. That seems to me to be the important thing here, not your sister's marital status. I don't blame you for not going back and I'd tell the minister exactly why too. How awful and embarrassing for your sister.
I had a good friend from highschool die about 10 years after we graduated. At the funeral the minister basically said that he was not sure if my friend was saved, so therefore did not think he was going to heaven. What a comfort for his family huh? He went on in this vein and used that to basically preach that we should all get right in our lives because you didn't want to die like our friend and not be saved. A group of us that had all been friends for a long time were so outraged, we almost got up and walked out, but stayed out of respect for the family. Too bad the preacher didn't have respect for the family. I vowed then and there never to set foot in that church again for anything and I did not. I spoke with my minister at the time and he was also appalled at what had been said, but knowing the other minister said he wasn't surprised. He then told me that when he stood in the pulpit he preferred to think that everyone in his congregation was going to heaven and that this minister thought the other way and used scare tactics in his sermons.