+ Reply to Thread
Like Tree7204Likes

Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #3211
    FORT Regular angelic_one2002's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Posts
    8,635
    Exactly, ScoutMom. I feel the same way. I don't understand what is so difficult about apologizing when someone is wrong. I think it's the only way to move on. In my opinion, it's a character flaw when someone is unable to apologize.
    "Success is falling nine times and getting up ten." - Jon Bon Jovi

  2. #3212
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Right Here, Right Now
    Posts
    25,811
    Quote Originally Posted by cricketeen;2287905;
    He could end up being your idiot late-husband.
    Don't be trying to get me all excited!!
    Last edited by prhoshay; 03-20-2007 at 12:40 PM.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  3. #3213
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893
    Quote Originally Posted by ScoutMom;2288022;
    I don't know why people have such a problem saying they made a mistake, they're sorry, and move on. Nobody wants to take responsibility for anything any more. It doesn't matter if it's murdering someone, a car accident, or a simple math error. Nobody is perfect. If you make a mistake, suck it up, admit it, try to learn from it, and move on.
    I don't understand this either. I have more respect (and later credibility) with someone that says: "I made a mistake", than I do with someone that tries to lie their way out of it or cover it up, especially when thre is proof (ie the emails, signature, etc.) If I know you are lying about something, then I'm not going to ever believe you, but if you own up to the mistake, I'll have a lot more respect for you both now and in the future.
    People with good character own up to their mistakes and those that blame others or try to cover it up or lie about it don't. Simple. For me anyway.
    Also makes me wonder what else they are capable of.
    =================
    Peeve: My SIL. Who is ALWAYS right. She argued with my husband for 10 min. last night on the phone on whether he was sick or allergies. She has allergies, so therefore EVERYONE has allergies right now and he's not sick. He told her about 3 times, I have fever and chills, its not allergies. She won't listen and he continues to argue with her. I was ready to scream at them both, but I didn't want her to know I was home because I don't want to talk to her. She has to have the final say on EVERYTHING and I'm tired of it. She used to be so much fun and we always had such a good time. Now I don't want to talk to her on the phone as I end up having to defend everything I do. So I just don't tell her anymore anything that's going on as I don't want her opinions on it.
    She has harped on the homeschooling to the point that I finally said: It's MY child, MY decision, not yours and she hung up on me.
    She's married to my brother and I just don't answer when she calls, but hubby HAS to answer the phone when it rings (another peeve). Me, I can let it ring. And he can argue with her, but out of my hearing please.
    Last edited by MRD; 03-20-2007 at 01:23 PM.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  4. #3214
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    In the trees
    Age
    54
    Posts
    6,911
    I have a friend who manages a division of a hospital and he was told, when he went through management training, to never, ever apologize or in any way admit culpability. I've found this policy to be true when dealing with any large organization, in particular the government, who will not admit receiving a package even though I have their dated signature on record. Worse, even though I had that proof and a return receipt e-mail indicating that they had also received the soft copy of the reports, our client came perilously close to losing their funding because the government never received their report .

    I find this policy to be absolutely ridiculous. Someone who's going to sue is going to sue, apology received or not, and I've found that when I screw up (it's happened, believe it or not), an apology and an effort to rectify matters will be far more beneficial to the company than any amount of denial and fingerpointing.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  5. #3215
    Bitten Critical's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Fangtasia - The Bar With Bite
    Age
    46
    Posts
    17,133
    Quote Originally Posted by Rattus;2288149;
    I have a friend who manages a division of a hospital and he was told, when he went through management training, to never, ever apologize or in any way admit culpability.
    I worked for a law firm and we were always told not to apologize, particularly in writing. I had many letters of mine edited because I would include language like "We apologize for any delay in processing your documents." I understood where they were coming from (not wanting to get sued down the road for lack of due diligence), but it was still frustrating when you couldn't just say to a client, "Look, I know that it totally sucks that we sat on your file for three weeks before doing anything. It's a mad house around here and your file just fell through the cracks." Just one of the many reasons I don't work there anymore!
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

  6. #3216
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    In the trees
    Age
    54
    Posts
    6,911
    Quote Originally Posted by Critical;2288188;
    ...but it was still frustrating when you couldn't just say to a client, "Look, I know that it totally sucks that we sat on your file for three weeks before doing anything. It's a mad house around here and your file just fell through the cracks." Just one of the many reasons I don't work there anymore!
    Oh totally. I will always apologize if I erred in any way, and if I get fired, so be it. I would rather take my chances with a black mark on my record for being a human being than live with the stress and guilt of being a corporate-formed conscienceless automaton.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  7. #3217
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893
    Quote Originally Posted by Rattus;2288149;
    I

    I find this policy to be absolutely ridiculous. Someone who's going to sue is going to sue, apology received or not, and I've found that when I screw up (it's happened, believe it or not), an apology and an effort to rectify matters will be far more beneficial to the company than any amount of denial and fingerpointing.
    Totally agree. I bet a lot of litigation could be avoided if an apology was offered in the first place.

    I think more of a person who can admit when they are wrong than I do someone who can't and it doesn't matter if it's company policy or not.
    I can always take my business elsewhere.

    I don't do well in office settings with multiple employees partly because of this.
    I'd rather work alone and then if I make a mistake, I'll own up to it to my boss like I have done countless times in the past. No one's perfect and no one does a perfect job at everything. Mistakes happen and apologizing for them helps more I think.

    In the past, had a situation with a co-worker, who couldn't WAIT to go tattle on me. I overheard her tell my supervisor ALL about it. I walked up and said:
    I made a mistake, here's what happened.......


    The tattle tale, nearly broke her jaw dropping it open because she couldn't believe that I would "admit" I did something wrong. (because she NEVER took the blame for anything and would NEVER own up to her mistakes)

    My supervisor ended up telling HER to mind her own business and telling me that she respected me more for coming to her to tell her I had made a mistake than in trying to cover it up. I told her: "I would have told you sooner, but _______ got there before me". I have surprised more than one boss by saying "I made a mistake" in the first place than causing office drama by covering it up, etc.

    I don't look at it as a weakness to say "I'm sorry" or "I made a mistake"
    I think its cowardice not to speak up and tell the truth.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  8. #3218
    Resident curmudgeon Newfherder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Enchanted by a beautiful Soprano
    Posts
    3,163
    I don't know why people have such a problem saying they made a mistake, they're sorry, and move on. Nobody wants to take responsibility for anything any more.
    I had an employee years ago who blamed me for not having a tripod in with the gear that he had loaded that morning. I refused to accept responsibility, since I was home sick that day. Nice try, buddy!
    "The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination."
    --Marion Zimmer Bradley

  9. #3219
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Right Here, Right Now
    Posts
    25,811
    Not being able to apologize or take responsibility for an error is a huge sign of immaturity. Just consider the source from whence the behavior is coming.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  10. #3220
    Dreamer rt1ky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Trying to free myself from the snarkside.
    Posts
    3,153
    Peeve: I can't find a reasonably priced hotel in Pacific Grove, CA with air conditioning. I don't want to take a chance on my asthma. I have to attend a conference at Asilomar and no one has ac. I know living by the water can keep things cools, but I have read a lot of hotel reviews where people complained about the lack of ac on hot days.

+ Reply to Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.