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Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #2091
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    gabriel, I think we're separated at birth on the home photo printing! My Epson printer uses up 6 cartridges (!!!) and it can get expensive to replace them. I almost died a month ago when I had to print out some photos and had to replace them--even though I hadn't used up all the ink--'cause I hadn't used it enough and they had dried up! (Normally I use them ALL 'cause I'm always printing photos out). Recently, my mother in law gave us a bunch of family slides. So the husband used his digital camera and tripod to take pictures of the projected slides, and then I printed them out at home and made family photo albums for all the siblings-in-law for Christmas. Yes, it can cost more to do-it-yourself, BUT, I can crop the photo to however I want and I have quality control and can tweak the images if I need to to make it darker or lighter, crop out folks I don't like () etc. I think it'll be a big hit. And I had a ton of fun making them! And I know no one else will get them the same thing.

    I do the same thing with old family photos as well. My dad used to take a lot of Polaroid snapshots when we were little. And we also have photos of my grandparents and no negatives. I've scanned those in, printed them out and framed them. I also copy all the jpegs onto discs and give them to family members with the prints so that everyone now has 'negatives.' I've only done about 15% of all the photos (it's a work in progress!) but I try to do at least a handful every week when I get a chance. I LOVE IT!

    I have a screensaver on my home computer that will do a slideshow of photos from our wedding...I change it every now and again so sometimes it'll be baby photos of my nieces and nephews; other times it'll be photos from our trips. When the prices go down a bit, I want to get one of those electronic photo frames where you stick in a memory card and it'll show different photos in the frame...but they're like $300 or $400 for a decent sized one and I want to wait til they're at least half that. I think that'd be a nice way to display vacation photos.

    myrosiedog, my friend has been dating a really nice man for the past two years. They're both the same age and earn the same salary, but he refuses to let her pay for ANYTHING when they go out to dinner. And she's a modern gal that doesn't want to take advantage of anyone. Even when she gives him a birthday present or takes him out to dinner for his birthday, he balks at her paying. Anyhow, she's started buying him gift cards to their favorite movie theaters and restaurants, 'cause this way she feels she's not mooching and he feels less awkward about accepting gifts from her. But this way, they both get to enjoy her gifts and he really loves them! I love getting gift cards to theaters. Movies can be so expensive these days to go to!

    Now me? I love giving presents (love wrapping paper and am the family gift wrapper!) AND receiving presents! It's so much fun. I don't care if it's a $5 McDonald's gift certifcate or a new Kate Spade hangbag. I love it all!

  2. #2092
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2185179;
    ...I however feel guilty if I don't get him something. ...But he really means it when he says: do not get me anything.
    This is what bugs me about the whole gift exchange thing (not your situation, specifically, rosiedog). Mr. Rattus and I do an exchange of small gifts because we've spent so many years tightening our belts in order to pay off our mortgage faster and consequently never managed to acquire the occasional frivolous luxury items that it's nice to get occasionally.

    With everyone else, however, I have a strict no gift policy. Everyone we know has everything they need, but not quite as much money as they would like, plus I'm environmentally friendly and don't feel the need to add to the landfill. The person or two who insist on getting me something, even though they know full well how I feel about the whole thing, are not doing it for me, they're doing it for themselves - it makes them feel good (never mind that it makes me feel guilty), or they would feel guilty not doing so (never mind that I would be much, much happier if they didn't), and their spending time to bake and decorate and wrap doesn't make the situation any more palatable than if they had spent time and money in the mall. Regardless, I will stand firm with the no-gift thing until they give up the idea of an exchange as a lost cause.

    Actually, thinking about it as I type this, if someone does insist on getting me a gift, I would like them to donate to charity in my name. Works for everyone involved.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  3. #2093
    MRD
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rattus;2185517;

    Actually, thinking about it as I type this, if someone does insist on getting me a gift, I would like them to donate to charity in my name. Works for everyone involved.
    I've done this before to my ungrateful family and it sure woke them up and the charity benefitted and not the bratty kids that have everything and more.

    I think this is a fabulous idea and charities need it and it makes the reciever know that they were thought of and that their "gift" is helping someone else.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  4. #2094
    FORT Fogey cricketeen's Avatar
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    I have a question:
    At what point do you cut off the gift list? We would buy for nieces and nephews until they were each married. Now that they are starting families, Mr. Cricket thinks we should buy Christmas gifts for their babies, but I think that is going too far. He has this fear of feeling awkward at his mother's house when she gives them presents and we don't. I say we will make them feel awkward for not buying our children presents. I think we should just let it go and not start a precedence that will snowball into something that we can't afford later when there are more and more grand-nieces and nephews. So how about it - do you buy presents for your extended families?
    "If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough." - Mario Andretti

  5. #2095
    Wait, what? ArchieComic Fan's Avatar
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    cricketeen, I say don't start buying for neices and nephews children beyond the initial baby gift for when the child is first born. I don't know if you have grandchildren but if and when you do, they are definitely going to be on your list. There's no reason to be including everyone elses kids when the kids of extended family have their own parents, aunts/uncles and grandparents to buy for them. As their great-aunt and uncle, you have no obligation. Not that there's any obligation to gift giving anyway. And there does need to be a cut-off point for nieces and nephews when there are many involved and it can hurt the pocketbook. Unless you're good at making things and then you can make something cost efficient and still give a nice gift (including food items if you're good at baking for example).

    In my husband's family there has never been any real system so last year I laid down the law to all of them (not meanly of course - just using that term for dramatic effect!) and said we can draw names from now on or not buy for anyone but it was awkward to give to everyone but only get from a few back or give none but get some, etc. From one year to the next I never knew what was going on. And he has a big family - 5 siblings, all married or with a girlfriend, and several kids - some older than 18, some younger.

    Last year I invited discussion about it and said we can draw names with the adults and buy for any kids under 18. We all agreed, it worked out nicely, and said we'd talk again this year about what to do. Well some of us have had some financial difficulties this year so we decided to just buy for the kids and not draw names. And the good news is for now there are only 2 kids under 18 (until some new babies are born).

  6. #2096
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cricketeen;2185539;
    So how about it - do you buy presents for your extended families?
    I buy for our parents all the time. My siblings and I don't exchange gifts unless there's a party for them--sometimes I'll get them something but usually I just buy for their kids. Anyhow, with the nieces and nephews. I'll get them stuff tilll they get to be adults (age to be determined! I'm guessing around 21 or so! We'll see...). I'm sure when their kids are born, I'll send them baby gifts...not sure for how long after that.

    I don't exchange gifts with my cousins--but when they get married or have babies, I send a wedding gift, baby gift etc. Unless I'm invited to the baby's first birthday party or what not (which is rare since we live far away), I don't send gifts after that. I don't think they expect it.

  7. #2097
    RENThead JLuvs's Avatar
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    With me I only buy gifts from my Mum, Dad, brothers and my nephews. Anything beyond that is extra and doesn't normally happen, though I did buy a present for my step dad this year.

    Our family is quite diplomatic in the giving of gifts. Since I was about 12, by brother are a few years older than me, we all made lists of what we would like for Christmas and birthdays. After that it is up to my family to decide what they buy from the list and make sure they don't get the same gifts. There is always tons of stuff on my list so that I am never sure what I am going to end up with. This works really well for my Dad as he is very hard to shop for.

    This year is actually the first time we haven't done lists since I was 12, so it will be interesting to see what I end up with.

    My Mum, however, has no cut off point for gifts, she gives stuff to her nephews kids and beyond. I guess it is a personal choice. Or a financial one, in my case.
    Whenever you see darkness, there is extraordinary opportunity for the light to burn brighter.
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  8. #2098
    FORT Fogey ScoutMom's Avatar
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    We buy for all the nieces and nephews. I don't exchange with my sister and brother-in-law. We used to do a pollyana with my husband's sisters and their husbands. But his one sister is miserable when it comes to gifts. If she doesn't like it, she'll make it very well known - to everyone. Once he got her a gift that his other sister recommended. It was exactly what she wanted - that year she complained that she thought it didn't cost as much as we were supposed to spend (even though my husband spent more just to get her something he knew she'd like!). After that year, we stopped and only give to the parents, nieces, and nephews.

  9. #2099
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    I make a point to never give a gift to someone who has proven that they have no sense of graciousness. My son has been intimidated to buy his dad (my former hubby) ever since he purchased him something for Christmas, and Mr. Rude, Crude, and Socially Unacceptable told him he didn't like it (this child was still in the single digits, mind you.) My heart broke...I no longer force the issue.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  10. #2100
    MRD
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    Moving (and joblessness) has cut my list significantly. All my neices and nephews are grown. Some have kids of their own. I have 10 great nieces and nephews and some I've never seen as their parents don't keep in touch even though I've tried. My husband has 11 grown nieces and nephews and 20 great nieces and nephews. So no way can we give to them.
    Since i was very close to my one brother and his family and we would go there for Christmas. We gave to my brother, SIL, niece and her husband (whose birthdays are the day before and the day after Christmas) and their two kids.
    However the two kids are ungrateful brats and I really dislike having to buy for them, so they are the ones I donated to charity in their name last year and this year they are getting a card.

    Our parents are deceased, so we basically just buy for our daughter and for each other if we have the money.

    The peeve I have is that for so long , we never gave each other stuff and then I thought: this is CRAZY! I married this man because I love him and he and my dauhgter are more important than my great uncle fred. So fred gets a card and hubby gets the gift now. I mean, who's more important? The person you married or someone you see once a year that doesn't appreciate anything anyway!
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

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