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Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #201
    An innocent bystander nlmcp's Avatar
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    I want to learn how to fence, a community college nearby has fencing classes and I'm tempted to take them. It looks fun.

    I tried taking dancing classess with my ex before we were married. It should have warned me. At one point he kept telling the instructor that I was doing it all wrong. She danced with me for awhile and told me I was doing it just fine, she danced with him and spent the whole time pointing out to him what he was doing wrong, and oddly enough he wouldn't go back the next week.

    It's amazing, I'm gone for a few days and something attacks my flowers and my weeds are a foot higher.
    I could go east, I could go west, it was all up to me to decide. Just then I saw a young hawk flyin' and my soul began to rise. ~Bob Seger

  2. #202
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    I guess this is as good a thread as any to get an opinion vis-a-vis my hair. First off, let me explain that I am a middle-aged, queen-sized secretary with the soul of a young, thin artist. I've been keeping my hair short for the past few years because it is more comfortable and easier to look after than long hair (plus, lots of grey). The problem is, I hate the way I look with short hair. I look like a middle-aged secretary when I want to look like the young artist I am inside (if I add some raccoon eyes and dangly earrings to the long hair it sort of works). Now if you had the same situation going on, which would you choose? Comfort or appearance?

    Unfortunately, each and every one of my girlfriends has left the country, so if I don't receive sufficient hair counselling here I'm going to have to take it to the guys when they come over tomorrow, and I know that won't be pleasant.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  3. #203
    Wait, what? ArchieComic Fan's Avatar
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    Rattus, your description of yourself is not unlike my own for myself! I've tried short hair but don't like the way I look in it. If I was younger, hipper, thinner maybe it would work. But like you said, it makes me feel older (and fatter ).

    It's currently just past my shoulders. Now mind you, I have thin hair, it never conforms to the latest styles, just hangs there with just enough wave to keep me from ever enjoying the frame around the face, layered, scissor cut type hairdo (think Morgan Fairchild). I always wished I could have that style but my hair refuses to comply. My bangs cannot be grown out because instead of looking hip like say Gwyneth Paltrow, they look straggly and weighed down with no body to it. So I have to keep bangs although I usually push them to the side instead of letting them be blunt cut.

    I have some gray hairs too and have recently begun using the Nice and Easy root touch-up with the comb instead of a whole box each time. Eventually my gray hair will require the whole box each time but so far I'm good.

    I shed like a cat and can't figure out why I'm not bald. Like I said, I don't have thick luxurious hair. I have to pull my hair back when I cook because if not there will be a gurantee of my hair falling into the food. I have to clean hair from my shirt constantly. If I ever committed a crime, I'd leave lots of DNA behind because I shed that much! In fact I think I'll ask my ob/gyn at my upcoming appointment if I need special vitamins or something.

    So basically what I'm saying is, I choose appearance (not that my appearance is great) over comfort . I like my hair longer even though it's a hassle (cleaning the shower drain - yuck!) but I like it better than short hair and I think the hubby prefers it long too. But he NEVER notices when I get it trimmed an inch or so !

    It's up to you - if you aren't happy with it short, grow it to your shoulders which can still be manageable. If you have a regular stylist, see what he/she says. The good thing about hair is that it does grow back if you get a cut you hate!

  4. #204
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    Actually, ArchieComic Fan, your reply reminded me of the texture of my hair - it's bad. That's why I cut it short in the first place. Very dry unless I condition, at which point it lies flat and greasy and makes me look like a prison guard. Thicker on one side than on the other. Flips up when I want it to flip under.

    But still, I prefer the way I look with shoulder-length hair. When it's doing what I want it to, anyway. What to do, what to do? Aarrrggghhhh!
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  5. #205
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rattus View Post
    Actually, ArchieComic Fan, your reply reminded me of the texture of my hair - it's bad. That's why I cut it short in the first place. Very dry unless I condition, at which point it lies flat and greasy and makes me look like a prison guard. Thicker on one side than on the other. Flips up when I want it to flip under.

    But still, I prefer the way I look with shoulder-length hair. When it's doing what I want it to, anyway. What to do, what to do? Aarrrggghhhh!
    Rattus, since you like your hair long...and you like the way you look with longer hair, I say grow your hair out. I think it'll be worth the inconvenience. If you can't stand it, you can always cut it shorter again. For growing out bangs (if you don't want them), I recommend a really cute head band or a little pomade to flatten it to the side of your face and keep it out of the way. On days when you can't be bothered with "styling" your hair, you can pull it back into a a sassy ponytail and maybe even curl the ends a little. The curls may give the illusion of some volume as well.

    (OK, don't hate me but I have really great hair--always have, it's genetic in the family. It's thick and grows like a weed (which is bad when I have shorter styles 'cause then I have to spend so much money getting my hair cut all the time). BUT...it doesn't hold a curl. EVER. So I always long for having thinner, wispy hair...)

    I've seen older women with long hair that looks really nice when it's well maintained. I've seen young women with ridiculously long hair that just looks like a rat's nest.

    Go for it! Good luck!

  6. #206
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Just out of curiosity....what do each of your hairstylists advise?

    I wear my hair short, and I love it, but I have a stylist who is a genius with the scissors. I found her by chasing a woman across a store to find out who cut her hair! I'm always on the lookout for someone who can cut...as a backup, if necessary. I just think it's, hugely, about the quality of the cut.

    Now, please don't take this the wrong way, but I've always noticed that long hair on older women seem to "pull down" their faces, accentuating the lines in the face.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  7. #207
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    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
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    I'm 44, have a lot of gray (that I color and it makes a HUGE difference. I use the drugstore products and I get great compliments on the color, so you don't have to spend a fortune and getting rid of the gray makes a huge difference).

    I have shoulder length hair. I too look terrible in short hair. I am too heavy for it. And have gotten it cut short several times in my life and have grown it back out.

    The secret to great hair is a great cut. Find a really good stylist. They will cut your hair how it grows, the texture of it, etc. I finally found someone who does a fantastic haircut and I'm moving. Because the cut is soo good, its not high maitenence, it looks good on me, and its cut how my hair will behave instead of me forcing my hair into a style its not meant for and spending ages on it.

    There are also GREAT products that help with conditioning that don't leave it flat and greasy (my problem as well.)
    And only condition the ends. don't put conditioner on your whole head as that helps make the top flat and greasy looking.

    Since I got my hair cut in this great style (and I asked a woman dining in a restuarant for the name of her stylist to find this woman) and colored it, people have been saying I look YEARS younger.

    I don't think longer hair on older women ages you. Its the style of the longer hair or should I say lack of style of longer hair on older women that ages them.

    My entire beauty routine in the morning takes me 25 min. from shower to out the door. And I blow dry my hair (but not curl it and I don't spend a lot of time blowing it with a round brush or anything). I can shower, brush my teeth, take my meds, put on foundation, blush, lipstick and eyebrow pencil and dry my hair, get dressed and be out and looking pretty good if I do say so myself in a short amount of time. I do NOT like to be high maitenece, but I do want to look good.

    Rattus, I say grow it out, color it and don't worry about the "rules" of older women and long hair. It's an individual look and style and do what you feel comfortable in. I too have a thin inner artist and I finally have decided to heck with what everyone else thinks, if I want to wear plaid chuck taylors then i am going to wear them and if I want feathers in my hair, I will do that too. Don't be afraid to be an individual. Of course its taken me 44 years to finally get the confidence to feel this way.

    Good luck.

    And remember the style is all in the cut. If you have to mousse, gel, blow, curl, spray, crimp and all that, then it isn't the right cut for you. A good cut should not have to have much else done to the hair to look good.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  8. #208
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    Well, my hairstylist is a 75 year-old barber . I go to him because I've never had a good cut in my life, not even at Sassoon, so I figure I can pay less money and help this old, customerless guy survive instead.

    I know what you mean about long hair dragging down an older woman's face. But fortunately, the excess avoirdupois keeps my face plumped up and wrinkle free, so that's not the problem with me. I think part of the problem with longer hair on older woman is the texture, though, as I mentioned about mine. It takes a lot more effort and money to keep it looking healthy and shiny and bouncy and all that good stuff.

    I think I'm feeling a little down about my appearance right now because I just spent 1,300 kilometres staring at my chubby, short-haired, bespectacled face in the side-view mirror, realizing how much I looked like what I really don't want to look like.

    Maybe I'll try dye and frameless lenses.

    ETA: Thanks, myrosiedog. Actually, one of the problems I'm having to contend with is how very, very comfortable short hair is. No hat/helmut hair, no trapped sweat, nothing sticking to or blowing in my face. That's why the question re: comfort or appearance. I DO want to look good, but dammit, I want to feel good too.
    Last edited by Rattus; 07-11-2006 at 12:07 PM.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  9. #209
    Mixing Old Fashioneds PhoneGrrrl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay View Post
    I wear my hair short, and I love it, but I have a stylist who is a genius with the scissors. I found her by chasing a woman across a store to find out who cut her hair! I'm always on the lookout for someone who can cut...as a backup, if necessary. I just think it's, hugely, about the quality of the cut.
    I completely agree--you need to find the right stylist. Also, if the texture of your hair is an issue, a good stylist can recommend products and even coloring to change the texture to make it more manageable. As much as I hate the inconvenience of getting my hair colored professionally (especially after doing it myself for years), the products and colorant improved my hair so much, I'll never go back to the box.

  10. #210
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
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    The older you get the more coarse your hair becomes .. and grey? those little suckers refuse to behave or hold on to colour for very long. I agree with long, unstyled hair on older women making them look older than they have to.
    I've noticed a huge texture change in my hair since I had my daughter - it's gotten curlier (bleah) and a little more hard to handle. I have a great stylist and you are all right... the cut makes the style.
    My mom is a hairdresser - she doesn't cut my hair because we have unresolved hair differences she wants my hair one way and I want it another .. so I pay for my cuts.
    I colour at home too, too bad the colour doesn't stay nice for more than 4 weeks - I find I have to colour too often.
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

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