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Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #17611
    FORT Fogey cablejockey's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I would be so mad that I would like to leave her gifts on a table with a note saying something like here you are, enjoy, then leave. She doesnt seem to care about visiting you and made all these other plans without even consulting to see what you thought! Yeah, Merry Christmas mom.
    But that isnt a practical solution. Are you going to see the rest of your family at actual Christmas? If so, maybe that will be something to look forward to while dealing with your daughter and her friends' visit.

  2. #17612
    I won't forget Cootie's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Sorry about the change in plans, Gutmutter. I would be sad, too. I hope the visit works out and that they don't leave too much of a mess! Hopefully when they show up and see your refrigerator, a couple of them will decide to go stay elsewhere? One can hope. Your daughter sounds like she is in her own world. I know that when I was that age, I didn't think out how my actions affected my family. I remember showing up to visit my parents without any warning many times, even when I lived in another state! It was my thinking that it was my home and that they always would welcome me. My parents did like having me there, of course, but I should have talked to them about it first. I didn't realize that I was possibly ruining some plans they may have had.

  3. #17613
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    The one friend who still has parents locally has decided to spend the evening and night with them and meet the girls for breakfast. The egomaniac has been talking non-stop but I'm just humming inside my head. In the kitchen there is wine mulling, cookies baking, homemade ravioli being rolled and formed. I keep taking breaks until somebody notices I'm missing and then when I go in I'm asked to find the cardamom pods, make the cookie frosting, find another pot, clear room - all at the same time with Christmas music playing louder than I can tolerate. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. (humming in my head). She asked me to take tomorrow off work when the plan was for me to drive her to the train station, but now they're leaving at 10. Oh well. I'll have the day to clean for my Christmas party.
    Count your blessings!

  4. #17614
    FORT Fogey Lil Bit's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    You really are an angel Gutmutter.
    History will have to record that the greatest tragedy of this period of social transition was not the strident clamor of the bad people, but the appalling silence of the good people. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  5. #17615
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Sounds, to me, like it's time to have an "adult heart-to-heart" with dear daughter, since you now (basically) lead a childfree life and deserve some consideration in your own home. I'm guessing the two of you can come to an understanding, but it's got to be SAID. I'm guessing she'll appreciate it, once she has a chance to think about it. Communication is the key!
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  6. #17616
    Best Ever Pool Runner Angry Birds Champion, Rancho Ice Racer Champion pikachu's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay View Post
    Sounds, to me, like it's time to have an "adult heart-to-heart" with dear daughter, since you now (basically) lead a childfree life and deserve some consideration in your own home. I'm guessing the two of you can come to an understanding, but it's got to be SAID. I'm guessing she'll appreciate it, once she has a chance to think about it. Communication is the key!
    I agree with prhoshay. If you keep accommodating your daughter's thoughtlessness, her behavior won't change. You'll enjoy her visits a lot more in the future if you set some ground rules with her. She might want to consider splitting the cost of staying at a hotel if she's going to bring a bunch of friends with her to visit. It's rude to expect you to put them up for free.

  7. #17617
    FORT Fogey nennie's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Sometimes kids are so frustrating. My daughter frustrates me to no end sometimes. I have been thinking about things I want to change in 2012.
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    You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.

  8. #17618
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    She apologized at the end of the visit because she realized her friend had monopolized our entire time together.
    Count your blessings!

  9. #17619
    Vidiot 13 is a Winner Champion Poppy Fields's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    There's something still childlike about college age kids. Everything you own is theirs. That includes your home, even if you've downsized! If your home was a place where their friends always gathered and were always welcome, that stays true in your kids' sensibilities in their early 20's.

    They do outgrow it. They come to realize that crashing in your living room with 3 guests is not comfortable for anyone involved, including you. Especially if you only have one full bath! God bless you for making their stay as comfortable as you possibly could.

    Merry Christmas, Gutmuuter. You're a great mom!
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  10. #17620
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Thank you so much, Poppy! I try my best. My son comes home tomorrow and then wants to borrow my car for a couple days to visit friends in another part of the state. I guess I can arrange things so I don't have anything I need to do outside the house those days. He's at another friend's in Boston/Worcester right not. I woke up this morning knowing my boy was in the same time zone. Mom radar.
    Count your blessings!

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