FORT Koffee Klatch

[Rattus]

What I don't understand is why she is miffed. So you already have plans - that wouldn't bother me; am I too easygoing?

I think you're just easygoing enough . I was told - not asked, told - a few days before my 23rd birthday (that would have been back in 1983 ) by my family that they were having dinner for me on Sunday. I said, sorry, but I've already made plans for that day (a friend was making me a birthday dinner and we were going to see Psycho at the rep theatre - my first viewing of it ever). That opened the floodgates of hysteria and recriminations that ended my relationship with my family for good. So in my eyes, most people could be just a little more easygoing.

[prhoshay]

I've found that it's not so much what you say as how you say it. If you pick your words with consideration, you can refuse gracefully (and it pays to practice!). That is something my whacked-out sister has yet to learn.

[Muduh]

It could be that some of Rattus' family members are like some of mine. I have a sister who thinks that no one should have plans until they check with her. I rarely see the woman because I flat refuse to answer to anyone about why I want to do one thing when they feel that I should do as I'm told.

[bbnbama]

I think you're just easygoing enough . I was told - not asked, told - a few days before my 23rd birthday (that would have been back in 1983 ) by my family that they were having dinner for me on Sunday. I said, sorry, but I've already made plans for that day (a friend was making me a birthday dinner and we were going to see Psycho at the rep theatre - my first viewing of it ever). That opened the floodgates of hysteria and recriminations that ended my relationship with my family for good. So in my eyes, most people could be just a little more easygoing.

Your statement made me feel so sad Rattus....I'm sorry about your relationship with your family....

[Amy Lee]

Your statement made me feel so sad Rattus....I'm sorry about your relationship with your family....

I don't feel bad about it, i guess it just kind of makes me like Rattus even more.
My point is that, there is something wrong with someone who'd react in such a manner. There is nothing i hate more then someone trying to force something on you.


ETA: Myrosiedog, i'd love to be related to you so that i'd tell those women to go kick rocks or something

[cricketeen]

I think you're just easygoing enough .

Why, thank you. May I quote you to my husband?

[dagwood]

We always have Thanksgiving at my aunts. She has the biggest house and an indoor pool. She does most of the cooking, but my mom and other aunt bring stuff, too. I am brining a desert this year, too. There are usually 25 or so people in and out all day. Very informal, but fun.

MRD, it is stupid of her to be mad at you. If you had planned on going the backed out at the last minute, I could see it. But, since you didn't she is just sounding petty.

[Rattus]

Your statement made me feel so sad Rattus....I'm sorry about your relationship with your family....

Thank you, but there really isn't anything to feel sad about. I gather that Muduh and I do have a few similarities in our family histories, so she likely understands how the quality of my mental health has increased exponentially over the years of no contact. I guess the breaking of ties probably does seem sad to those who have good, supportive families who love them, but for those of us who don't, the best thing to do is learn to depend on yourself and form new ties with decent people.

[Muduh]

There are reasons why I moved from home right out of highschool and have seldom returned since my daddy passed away.

Rattus, sometimes you just gotta do what ya gotta do for your own self.

[prhoshay]

Muduh, I agree with you 100%! Your sanity is more important. My sister used to tell me I was adopted......now I tell people I was adopted.
Works for me!