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  1. #1561
    Mixing Old Fashioneds PhoneGrrrl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2127838;
    I have a friend who is Catholic and her daughter has a baby out of wedlock. It's ok to do that, but its not ok to "live in sin" with the baby's father. Her baby was allowed to be baptized. My friend was saying that its not ok to teach birth control, but that then its ok to have a baby out of wedlock.

    and the church does do things according to how much money you throw at them. We had a similar experience in our family when my brother went to marry a Catholic. The priest actually asked for a "donation" to speed up the wedding as my future SIL was pregnant. I'm sure that not everyone has to spend money, but I'm sure the money helps.
    While is no secret the Catholic church has had a long, fairly shady history of requiring money for certain things (indulgences in the old ages, annulments in modern times) it is never "OK" in the Church's eyes to have premarital sex. Of course, there is no reason to punish the child that is the product of the premarital sex, so the child would be able to be baptized. It has been the long-standing policy in my diocese to not allow couples who have had children or are pregnant prior to marriage to have an "easy time" of getting hitched in the church. They may ultimately do it, but the pre-cana is much more extensive, as it should be if you are going to knowingly violate church law. In my opinion, if you don't like the Catholic church law, then get married somewhere else.

  2. #1562
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhoneGrrrl;2128049;
    While is no secret the Catholic church has had a long, fairly shady history of requiring money for certain things (indulgences in the old ages, annulments in modern times) it is never "OK" in the Church's eyes to have premarital sex. Of course, there is no reason to punish the child that is the product of the premarital sex, so the child would be able to be baptized. It has been the long-standing policy in my diocese to not allow couples who have had children or are pregnant prior to marriage to have an "easy time" of getting hitched in the church. They may ultimately do it, but the pre-cana is much more extensive, as it should be if you are going to knowingly violate church law. In my opinion, if you don't like the Catholic church law, then get married somewhere else.
    In my Lutheran church (Missouri Synod), our pastor will not marry a couple who has been living together "in sin". I remember the questioning I got 25 years ago from the pastor who married us. The first words out of his mouth were "Are you pregnant?" I seriously doubt that we would have been allowed a church wedding if my answer would have been "yes".

  3. #1563
    Mixing Old Fashioneds PhoneGrrrl's Avatar
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    My particular pastor won't do a wedding at all if the couple has been "in sin" especially if the bride-to-be is pregnant. This has perturbed more than one big donor, I can tell you! Usually, though, the couple can get married civilly then, after counseling and certain other marriage classes, can get their marriage blessed. They encourage this route so that the child is brought up in the Church. After all, they do want to keep the membership numbers up.

  4. #1564
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhoneGrrrl;2128204;
    After all, they do want to keep the membership numbers up.
    Good point!

  5. #1565
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    cricketeen: We don't have a police blotter. If we did, I'm sure it would take the whole newspaper. We had the dubious title of most violent city in Canada last year per capita. So much goes on, I don't think the police really want everyone to know every single incident. Only high profile crimes get noticed now...as in multiple murders. We had 3 kids gunned down at a club on the weekend.

    Mudah: I guess I should have e-mailed the "breaking news" page of my local tv station. They might have sent someone out if it was a slow news night. Or, if I had a video camera, I could have taken some footage and sent it in to get aired with a story. But I don't have one of those.

    AJane: I'm not a member of the Community League but I should look into getting monthly police reports on the area. That would be good to know.
    I recently found out my neighbors car was egged and also hit with computer parts (?) two nights in a row. She parks out front, but still. I had no idea until I bumped into her raking leaves. She didnt know that two of us had our outdoor lights vandalised either.

    Thanks all for your comments. We have had a grow-op in the area, but our "Green Team" drug team does the bust and puts up signage to say where it is. The home is usually deemed a health risk because of mold from the humidity of growing marijuana, but you normally can't tell from the outside.
    --------------

    On the discussion of Catholic churches, weddings, annullments and such, I'm just going to step away from the computer. It's all about the money...Oopsy, did I say that out loud?!

    Over to see what happened to myrosiedog's job in the other thread.
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  6. #1566
    FORT Fanatic anemone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lois Lane;2127558;
    And if he (Iglesias) is such a devout Catholic, why's he having children out of wedlock with his girlfriend?

    Muduh, I think you're right about Ted Kennedy. And if he didn't, he tried awfully hard to get one... grrrr...

    Who said Iglesias IS a devout Catholic?
    It may have been Isabel that wanted the annulment so that she would later be able to marry with the blessing of the Church.

    I don't know about Ted Kennedy. Joe, one of Robert's sons, did petition for an annulment, but it was not granted.

    As a practicing Catholic - yes, I practice because I am not very good at it. - I object to the characterization that the Church will do things according to how much money you throw at them.
    As PhoneGrrrl said, "While is no secret the Catholic church has had a long, fairly shady history of requiring money for certain things. . . " However, most churches or religious organizations have an expectation of monetary support from its members. Because an annulment is an involved process, there are administrative fees, as with an beauracracy. Many dioceses will not even accept donations beyond filing fees until after the annulment decision is made.

  7. #1567
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anemone;2128258;
    ...As a practicing Catholic - yes, I practice because I am not very good at it. - I object to the characterization that the Church will do things according to how much money you throw at them
    Sorry if I offended you anemone with my Oopsy remark. Stepping back away from the computer once again.
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  8. #1568
    MRD
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    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
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    It amazes me that pastors would not marry couples who "lived in sin" or who were expecting. At least they are trying to make it legal or right, but being denied that, then what do they do? Continue to live in sin? Have a baby out of wedlock?

    I am so very glad that my particular denomination is very tolerant of that and does not deny couples that wish to marry, despite any prior circumstances.

    I also went to Catholic school, so while i am not Catholic, I have a pretty good understanding of the church as I had to take religion classes and go to mass weekly in school.

    And for some reason, I seem to know a lot of, and this is their term, not mine, "recovering Catholics".

    That said, this discussion can easily deteriorate, so I am backing out of it now before I get in too much trouble.
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    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  9. #1569
    On a cupcake mission! Lois Lane's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anemone;2128258;
    Who said Iglesias IS a devout Catholic?
    He did, in several interviews I read (one was in the Chicago Sun-Times or the Chicago Tribune) as well as a Telemundo interview with him after one of his previous children with his girlfriend was born (a friend translated for me).

    Quote Originally Posted by anemone;2128258;
    Because an annulment is an involved process, there are administrative fees, as with an beauracracy. Many dioceses will not even accept donations beyond filing fees until after the annulment decision is made.
    I guess my problem is with annuling marriages more than anything else. I am not Catholic but, as you can imagine growing up in Chicago, many of my friends (and some relatives) are. However, many of the ones who're my generation are lapsed Catholics who want nothing more to do with the church. Interestingly enough, their parents are devout Catholics with deep love and respect for the church. I don't know enough about Catholicism to carry on an informative conversation with you all who do. But I will say that I don't agree with some of the teachings that I do know. However, I strongly believe in the right for people to belong to whatever church they like and support their faith (well, except maybe the Church or Scientology...).

    misskitty, you can say what you please. Everyone's been very civil and informative, as far as I'm concerned. myrosiedog, your church sounds fantastic. anemone, no offense was intended to you personally.
    Last edited by Lois Lane; 11-03-2006 at 07:22 PM.

  10. #1570
    FORT Fanatic anemone's Avatar
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    Nope, not offended!
    I object to the characterization of the Catholic church being the ONLY religion that is about money. I see the televangelists that ask you to dig deeeep into your pockets for your own salvation . . . or Scientologists or any number of other religious or pseudo-religious organizations.
    That is what I object to.

    That said, I see this as a slippery slope and I don't want to get into any kind of my religion is better than yours discussion.

    Anybody want to change the subject?

    How about jumbo shrimp: Are they jumbo or are they shrimp? Discuss amongst yourselves.

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