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Thread: FORT Koffee Klatch

  1. #14501
    FORT Fogey Add It Up Champion famita's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    I agree w/writing it down and walking away for a while. Go back and re-visit it, but walk away again. Maybe, just maybe she's so gosh darn jealous of you that she has to criticize you. You are married with a child (who's getting married next year) AND you're going back to school AND you're getting good grades AND you have a job that you love AND you keep a lot of people entertained! Pat yourself on the back and think about this: does she really matter?

  2. #14502
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by Gutmutter;3771020;
    Once his job is over, will you still have contact with her? I would urge you to write it all down like Columbia said, but never send it or say it. We never know what another person is dealing with even if it seems they have a charmed life. Maybe she's jealous of you. Maybe she's just a pruney person. Either way, a rant won't change her. Build a bridge. Invite her for that coffee, but tell her you envy her life of apparent ease. Maybe you'll learn something. You could even say how much you love your husband and child and life, but it's all a struggle to juggle sometimes (come on, you know it's true). My mom is going through a rough time and people are coming out of the wood work to support her. She told me that two women she had judged harshly expressed their support at different times and one even came up to her in the grocery store and hugged her. She said she wishes she had not been so judgemental of those women all these years. Girlfriend - do a Tonglen for the woman.

    Deepak Chopra has a lot to say about toxic emotions, etc. You can google him, or put him up on YouTube. He makes a lot of good sense. You can also google "tonglen" which I just did to find out what it's all about. Good references, too. Hope this is helpful.....

  3. #14503
    FoRTer coltnlasma's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by famita;3771067;
    I agree w/writing it down and walking away for a while. Go back and re-visit it, but walk away again. Maybe, just maybe she's so gosh darn jealous of you that she has to criticize you. You are married with a child (who's getting married next year) AND you're going back to school AND you're getting good grades AND you have a job that you love AND you keep a lot of people entertained! Pat yourself on the back and think about this: does she really matter?
    Just wanted to chime in and reinforce what famita said. I suspect this woman's criticisms could be rooted in jealousy, and keeping that in mind won't really help change her behavior but it might make it a bit easier for you to take. At any rate, take care and don't let her rent space in your head.
    Life is short ~ smile while you still have teeth.

  4. #14504
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Quote Originally Posted by coltnlasma;3771093;
    Just wanted to chime in and reinforce what famita said. I suspect this woman's criticisms could be rooted in jealousy, and keeping that in mind won't really help change her behavior but it might make it a bit easier for you to take. At any rate, take care and don't let her rent space in your head.
    "Rent space in your head..." What a fabulous expression!!

  5. #14505
    That's all folks! Unklescott's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Someone sent this to my daughter-in-law and she shared it with me. It really brought tears to my eyes.

    First Christmas In Heaven by Tammy Chapman

    I see the countless
    Christmas trees
    around the world below
    With tiny lights, like Heaven's stars,
    reflecting on the snow

    The sight is so spectacular,
    please wipe away the tear
    For I am spending Christmas with
    Jesus Christ this year.

    I hear the many Christmas songs
    that people hold so dear
    But the sounds of music can't compare
    with the Christmas choir up here.

    I have no words to tell you,
    the joy their voices bring,
    For it is beyond description,
    to hear the angels sing.

    I know how much you miss me,
    I see the pain inside your heart.
    But I am not so far away,
    We really aren't apart.

    So be happy for me, dear ones,
    You know I hold you dear.
    And be glad I'm spending Christmas
    with Jesus Christ this year.

    I sent you each a special gift,
    from my heavenly home above.
    I sent you each a memory
    of my undying love.

    After all, love is a gift more precious
    than pure gold.
    was always most important
    the stories Jesus told.

    Please love and keep each other,
    my Father said to do.
    I can't count the blessing or love
    has for each of you.

    So have a Merry Christmas and
    Wipe away that tear
    Remember, I am spending Christmas with
    Jesus Christ this year

  6. #14506
    Over and Out! Bunny555's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    That's really beautiful....I hope it provided some measure of comfort. Your family is in my thoughts at this diffult time of year.

  7. #14507
    FORT Fogey brunette trixie's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Unk, that really is so beautiful.

    mrd, I hope the venting help get this silly woman out of your head. She sounds like someone who is so unhappy that she has tons of negative emotion to share with others. It must be awful to be connected to such a person while your husband is doing work for her, but the good news is that is only temporary!

  8. #14508
    FORT Fogey norealityhere's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Unk,
    Thanks for posting that. Really makes you think about the true meaning of Christmas.

    May your family be comforted at this time of year. I know that all of us at FORT hold you in our prayers.
    To Thine Own Self Be True

  9. #14509
    Pineapple! ClosetRTWatcher's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    Unk, my thoughts and prayers are also with your family during this holiday season.

    Hoping today that all of our FORT friends in the east are safe during this winter storm!!

  10. #14510
    FORT Fogey Missyboxers's Avatar
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    Re: FORT Koffee Klatch

    My family and I went into NYC today for the Duke-Gonzaga game. When we got home around 8:30, there were about 2 inches on the ground (southwestern CT). When I went out to play in the snow with my sister and her visiting friend around 11:30, we had easily 6 inches and it's still coming down! The Christmas lights around town (and in my yard, hey, I'm biased) look so pretty with the snow. We could get close to a foot by the time all is said and done, as the heaviest snow is supposed to come between 1-6 am.

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