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Thread: Relationship Challenged

  1. #241
    That's all folks! Unklescott's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nlmcp
    Shoot I'm still in the sharing my house with the soon to be ex phase. Which isn't much fun.
    *Gets chills remembering those days*

  2. #242
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Those days were the worst in my life!!! I'm in the divorced with 3 teenagers - so not much chance of anything phase.
    Count your blessings!

  3. #243
    JR.
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    Drummer / Model JR.'s Avatar
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    A bit of advice on the soup du jour thing - make sure everyone knows. That will help avoid some ugly situations.

  4. #244
    So Far Away Yellow Apple's Avatar
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    Well I'm in the "never been married or engaged and doesn't have kids and never really had a serious relationship" group. If there is such a group, of course. I'v always gone for younger women, but I suppose I could be some older woman's boytoy too.
    R.I.P Willie Dog (?/?/1989-12/17/2004). Gone but never forgotten.

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  5. #245
    Premium Member Yeti Long Shot: Porpoheus Champion
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yellow Apple
    Well I'm in the "never been married or engaged and doesn't have kids and never really had a serious relationship" group. If there is such a group, of course. I'v always gone for younger women, but I suppose I could be some older woman's boytoy too.

    Do you have a resume you can forward to me?

  6. #246
    MIA, RIP, or Busy...
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yellow Apple
    Well I'm in the "never been married or engaged and doesn't have kids and never really had a serious relationship" group. If there is such a group, of course. I'v always gone for younger women, but I suppose I could be some older woman's boytoy too.
    A Bachelor fan til it dies a slow death and oddly enough, A Rock of Love fan...finest hair extensions from Europe and all. ;-)

  7. #247
    FORT Fogey famita's Avatar
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    This brings so many memories back! I got divorced in 85 and haven't dated yet. I decided to raise my kids because I felt no one would love them as much as I do. I am now contemplating dating, but what is it like now? Do you kiss on the first date? Do you do more on the second date? Unk, you're a man about town, what advice do you have to give? What is ok and not ok now?

  8. #248
    Leave No Trace ADKLove's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ineedalife
    OTS-my friends think history will repeat itself and worry that I will marry the first thing that I like... They think I should not date at all for a while and at first, I thought that they were probably right, but I'm a fun-loving person and I hated to feel like a shriveled prune.
    Ineedalife
    Imdeed we ARE long lost virtual sisters (as we talked about before). I too am a serial monogamist. I, too, was married twice. First time (I was 21) lasted 7 years (no kids) Dated like a mad-woman, afraid and embarrassed by being so young and divorced. Dating like a mad-woman led to me be married to my second husband. Second time lasted 3 years (and we had my daughter together). Kicked him out of the house and out of my daughter's life ( he agreed, so I know it was a good call) Didn't date for a bit, then hooked up with an old friend from college. It was comfortable, but he lived 3 hours away, so the pressures eventually took hold. The long distance relationship ended after 4 years, back in December, although we both struggled with the breaking of ties for a while. (The distance became to great to bear, and the relationship couldn't "go anywhere", as neither of us was willing to give up our careers, homes, etc.) I, too, suffer from JLO syndrome (or did, for a time). I know I had very good reasons for divorcing both times .(substance abuse and cheating / alcohol and verbal abuse), and for ending the long-distance relationship. I wasn't interested in dating ever again. Too afraid of heartbreak, and lets face it, a twice divorced single mom isn't exactly (well, in my mind at least) anyones idea of an ideal woman. I didn't want to "date" - have people coming in and out of my daughters life (she had been very attached to my long-distance guy). I don't really hit the bar scene. I work for a family business, so not a lot of opportunity to meet people there.

    But, to tell the truth, I am someone who likes being with someone - who likes sharing my life, and its ups and downs, with someone. I don't want to be alone. I have a lot to offer and a lot of love to give. I've grown into my own, learned from my experiences, and feel I'm a better person for it. I feel more attractive and alive than I've felt in my entire life. I know better now who I am, what I can accomplish, and what I can give. When I wasn't even looking, and from where I least expected to find it, I met someone, and he's amazing. He, too has been married twice, and has children And he's been hurt before/ dissappointed before. I feel like after all those years of looking and longing and searching I have finally found my *gulp* soulmate. I've never felt that way about someone before. We started dating the beginning of the year, off and on, and started really more on than off in May, and we are taking it slowly, not because of reactions from my friends, family, parents, etc, but because we are both at a point in our lives where we realise a great relationship is more than just feelings. It gets complicated, and especially with children involved.

    When we first started dating, my siblings, parents were kind of like :rolleyes "again" and "don't jump in too quick" and "take things slowly" so we kept (and to a certain extent still do) it kind of low-key for other people (plus we're both busy in our "own" lives and like it that way, too) I understand why they say that, but you know what? Its not their life. I know all about heartache. I know where things have gone wrong in the past. There's nothing they need to warn me about, or protect me from. I've been there, done that. I know some people who are just dealing with crummy relationships/marriages for the sake of staying together. I wasn't that way, and I have no regrets about it.

    I find I'm more reluctant to verbalize my feelings with my beau than I have ever been before, but that is because I've said I Love You before. And he's heard it before. So we have this kind of unspoken bond between us, which we both understand and respect. I'm so glad I've opened my heart to him - so glad I didn't let him walk right back out of my life - so glad I took another chance on happiness. We both know, at the heart of it, this is what we've both been hoping for all our lives. We're not going to blow it.

    Ineedalife - The heck with what everyone else says. You be true to yourself - life is too short to worry about other's impressions. You only go through life once.

    Do it your way.
    Love many, trust a few, and always paddle your own canoe

  9. #249
    Staying Afloat speedbump's Avatar
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    Anyone have some tissues I can borrow? That was a great post ADK and very inspirational. Seriously, it was. Two snaps and around the world!
    You got to cry without weeping. Talk without speaking. Scream without raising your voice.- U2

  10. #250
    Just Forting Around roseskid's Avatar
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    I'm with speedy on this one......ADK, that was such a lovely, hopeful, heart-warming post/testamonial you gave above. Em is very lucky to have a wonderful, articulate, loving Mom like you.

    Btw, love the lyrics quoted in your sig line.....good ol' Beatles...aaaahhhhh.
    Love The Bachelor? Catch the recap for this season's sacrificial lamb lucky guy here in Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3, Episode 4, Episode 5, Episode 6 and Episode 7.

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