Your annoying co-worker

[bbnbama]

I work for an attorney who mainly specializes in real estate/mortgages, etc. I love my job but I had someone send me this and it was so fitting...I'm sure there are others here who deal with real estate who could appreciate this!

You could probably remove the words 'mortgage business' in the next to last line and substitute any other job and I'm sure it would be very fitting for them too...!

Poem for Women in Mortgage Lending

Last night as I lay sleeping
I died or so it seemed,
Then I went to heaven
But only in my dream

Up there St Peter met me
Standing at the pearly gates,
He said 'I must check your record
Please stand here and wait.'

He turned and said 'Your record
Is covered with terrible flaws,
On earth I see you rallied
For every losing cause.'

I see that you drank alcohol
And smoked and partied too,
Fact is, you've done everything
A good person should never do.

We can't have people like you up here
Your life was full of sin,
then he paused as he read the last of my record,
Took my hand and said 'Come on in.'

He led me up to the big boss and said
'Take her in and treat her well.
She used to work in the Mortgage business
So she's done her time in hell.'

[Google]

 

[bbnbama]

Slap Your Co-Worker Day is coming!!


Tomorrow is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday: Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't give a damn about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it? Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very, very glad to officially announce tomorrow as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! There are the rules you must follow:

* You can only slap one person per hour - no more.
* You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day.
* You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-workers take their turns slapping the irritant.
* No weapons are allowed...other than going upside somebody's head with a stapler or a hole-puncher.
* CURSING IS MANDATORY! After you have slapped the recipient, your "assault" must be followed with something like "cause I'm sick of your stupid-a$$ always messing up stuff!"

* If questioned by a supervisor or police, if the supervisor is the irritant, you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE! Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that you want to slap the living day lights out of and get to slapping.....and have a great day!

Oh...if only this could be true............

[famita]

I've already let my office mate know that she can slap me tomorrow!

[Newfherder]

* No weapons are allowed...other than going upside somebody's head with a stapler or a hole-puncher

I use a pick and shovel to punch holes in the ground, so I'm assuming that's allowable

[dagwood]

Sounds fair to me, Newf.

So, I work at home now. Does that make me my annoying co-worker?

[CantGetNuf]

I have a boss who is absolute milk toast. He is the biggest push over.
I have a problem employee who calls off all the time. I don't mean a few times a month, I'm talking a few times a week every week. I work in a long term care facility so we need our employees to make it to work. Not having a shift covered is just unacceptable. I'm usually the one who gets stuck having to cover it. Well I have hired some really good employees so I have cut the problem employees hours back. So much that she is only scheduled 4 days this month.
She called me today just raising cain that I cut her hours. She says she needs more hours and I told her I need an employee who can make it to work. So she yelled and we argued a little longer. She said I'm going to come by there to talk to you and I also need to talk to whoever is above you. I told her fine.
I then called our regional administrator who only visits our facility once a month and tell him whats going on. He totally understands and is on my side 110%. Wonderful!
So she comes to the facility and starts yelling and fussing. I told her she can yell all she wants but nothing is going to change. She then asks for our regional administrators phone number and I give it to her.
10minutes later our regional administrator is calling saying he's agreed to meet with her and me on Monday. What??!! There is no negotiating. I am not going to bend on this. I don't want to quit my job over her but if he decides we need to give her more hours I am going to be pissed!! I am going to make it very clear to him that the next time she calls off I am not going to cover her shift. I am so mad at him because all he had to say to her was that I'm the administrator and I have final say. I know she got him on the phone and started talking to him the way she does me and it probably intimidated him and he was trying to pacify her. I am so mad at him because she was at the point that she was ready to quit and that would have been a problem solved but now I have to deal with her again and possibly have him undermine my authority. Arrggg!! I'm so frustrated!!

[Terena79]

I work at a hotel and one of our newer employees, I'll call him "Albert", is an old man who has no car. Because of this our GM has allowed him to basically live on the property. (I also have no car, but I still manage to go back and forth everyday and this guy lives closer than I do.. but I digress..) So this guy has his own room at the hotel but he is still ALWAYS around the office/lobby area. It's driving all of us insane. The only one who likes him is the GM, who happens to have "daddy issues" and for that reason whenever we complain about Albert we're told "he's an old man, he may not be around much longer, be nice to him." I have work to do. I'm not here to keep Albert company. But the absolute WORST thing about Albert is that even though he has his own hotel room complete with private bathroom, he still comes into the office to use the employee restroom and STINKS IT UP TO HIGH HEAVEN! It stinks so bad it wafts all the way out into the lobby. It's embarrassing. It takes hours for the stench to clear up and so the rest of the employees must wait forever before we're able to use the only bathroom provided for us. (It's against policy for an employee to use a guest room bathroom for cleanliness purposes, I guess.) But Albert HAS his own personal bathroom in his room so why does he come all the way to the office to do his doody? It just makes me SOOO ANGRY! The GM refuses to put a stop to this and thinks we're being babies. He says "everyone sh*ts." He's just started getting us nice Glade and Febreze plugins for the bathroom but even those aren't enough to combat the horrible stench. The GM just refuses to tell him to use his own bathroom.

So that's my horrible coworker story. BTW, I actually sent this problem into Dear Abby so if you see it published you'll know it was from me.

[brunette trixie]

Terena Maybe he is marking his territory?

I can't believe you complained to your gm and he didn't do anything. Maybe if you get some of the hotel guests to complain about the stinky lobby, he will have to listen.

CantGetNuf Nothing is worse than having a situation settled and having your superior come in and try to "help". Hope the meeting goes your way on Monday.

[Critical]

CantGetNuf - I'm sorry this is such a headache for you. Just go into that meeting armed with statistics showing all the times she missed work. If the guy gives in to her after knowing the real story, he's a moron.

Terena - Why does it have to be the GM that speaks to Albert? Couldn't someone else do it? The next time he has an incident in the employee restroom, you should ask him for the key to his room so you can use HIS restroom! ITA - if any guest complains at all, I'd make sure the GM finds out about it.

[bbnbama]

How to Tell if you Need to Pray at Work... (and yes, they ALL apply to me too!)