Geez, sounds like my husband's family. We got a call yesterday telling us that they are having a surprise birthday party for my father in law. This weekend. Everyone in the family knows that my husband and I both work on the weekends. And if that wasn't enough, the party is Sunday evening at 5 p.m., 100 miles away from where we live. Mr. Bit works Sunday afternoon AND he has to be to work at his full time job at 5 a.m. Monday morning. So, even if we could both find someone to work for us Sunday, that's a long drive to make after a party on a Sunday night. I have no idea why they didn't schedule it for a Saturday night or even Friday night. This is probably more convenient for them, but WE will be the A-holes for not attending. We just can't win with these people and I, for one, have stopped trying.
Btw, my husband's brother, who always complains that we don't go to see them, has been to our house ONCE in the last 12 years! I'm pretty sure they live the same distance from us as we do from them.
MRD - one thing I've learned is that it's better to get people like that out of your life. You have enough on your plate without having to worry about what idiots like those two "friends" think or say. Turn the page on them and get on with rebuilding your life. I'm so glad you have so many good friends to help you through this difficult time.