+ Reply to Thread
Like Tree1778Likes

Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #8101
    FORT Fogey Ellen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    6,190

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Lil Bit, I don't really pray, but for what it's worth, I'm believing in the best possible outcomes for you and (for lack of a better phrase) keeping my thoughts positive and filled with good wishes with regard to your situation.
    "There's no crying in baseball!"
    -- Tom Hanks, A League of Their Own

  2. #8102
    FORT Fogey Lil Bit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Iowa
    Age
    55
    Posts
    3,571

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Thanks guys. I appreciate the good thoughts. God knows, I need them. It seems to be a never ending drama show around here. I've dumped so much of my dirty laundry in here, what's another load, huh? My son got a call from DHS yesterday. Seems his ex turned him in for child abuse (again) because I have a picture on my Facebook that she happened by that has my son and his daughter sitting on our 4 wheeler. She turned him in for giving her a ride without her wearing a helmet. The problem is... they weren't riding it. They were just sitting on it. The weekend the pic was taken we'd had a lot of rain and my husband doesn't allow anyone to ride the 4 wheeler when it's so wet because it tears up the grass. And Alexis DOES have a helmet that she wears on the rare occasion that she rides with anyone, at about 2 miles an hour in a circle in the yard. For Gods sake, we aren't out moto-crossing with a 2 year old. So, instead of calling me or my son and talking to us about it, she turns him in for child abuse. The caseworker talked to my son and he said that she told him she knows that it's not a big deal, but she has to follow up on all calls. She wanted to just resolve the issue with a phone call but he scheduled an appointment for her to come out to our house this weekend while Alexis is here for her visit. This is the third time his ex has done this and every time the claims have been ruled unfounded. BUT, it's still in his records that he had child abuse claims filed against him. The first time was when he was fighting for time with Alexis, the second time when he first filed papers to see Baileigh and now he's just threatened her with a court hearing to decide visitation and other problems, so along comes another abuse claim. There should be a way to punish people for making false reports, but apparently they don't want to do anything to discourage people from filing legitimate reports, so these type slip through all the time.

    The funny part is that the 4 wheeler was parked about 4 feet from our patio. If he'd been driving it he would have been just about to crash right into it. And his ex knows that because she been here plenty of times.
    When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "Happy." They told me I didn't understand the assignment. I told them they didn't understand life. - John Lennon

  3. #8103
    MRD
    MRD is offline
    FORT Fogey MRD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    somewhere resting
    Age
    52
    Posts
    16,893

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Lil Bit. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Until this gets resolved, it might be a good idea not to post any photos at all of the kids. I know that's hard as you're proud of your children and grandchildren, but if she's going to be looking for nonsense like this, don't give her any more ammunition. She's a nutjob and sounds like she will do anything to get her way. Even something innocent isn't in her eyes, so just don't give her any chance to do this again.
    I feel for your son. It's got to be horrible. YOu too.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  4. #8104
    FORT Fogey norealityhere's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    8,148

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Lil Bit,

    I'm sorry to hear that the ex is still being so awful to him. I truly hope they can resolve the issues at some point.
    To Thine Own Self Be True

  5. #8105
    Premium Member Yeti Long Shot: Porpoheus Champion
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    SLC, UT
    Posts
    3,160

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    This is a tough problem all the way around, Lil Bit. As I've stated before, in my career I have worked on, probably hundreds of divorces. The basics are usually the same (i.e., using the kids as pawns), but each one has its own special details. The biggest change I've seen over the last couple of years involves the internet. Parents (regardless of mother or father, or custodian or non-custodian) are posting their children's photos on their myspace or facebook accounts. It seems natural to most of us to be proud of our kids and want to share the little darlings. While nearly everyone does it nowadays, a vindictive ex can and usually will find some way to prove the other a bad parent, no matter how innocent the pictures are. The resolution usually comes about by taking the pictures down, no matter how innocent the posting may have been.

  6. #8106
    FORT Fogey Lil Bit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Iowa
    Age
    55
    Posts
    3,571

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    The caseworker came out here Saturday and it all went well I think. I offered to show her the picture and she said she'd seen it and that it's obvious from the picture that they were just sitting on it. I then told her that we have a helmet that Lexie wears and she asked to see it so I went and got it and Alexis turned out to be our best witness. She saw me come in the house with it and she yelled, "that's MY helmet!" She grabbed it and put it on. The caseworker asked her "what happens when you wear your helmet?" And Lexie said, "I get to ride the 4 wheeler!" After that the subject was pretty much dropped. We did explain to her what is going on with the custody fight for the baby and she asked some questions about how we felt the ex was raising the girls. My son took the high road and didn't bring up most of the petty crap that's been going on because truthfully, there isn't anything that can be done about it. You can't change someone else's behavior. He just let the woman know that all he wants is to be a part of his daughter's lives. When she left she said that she had to go over her notes but that as far as she could see right then, the claim would be ruled unfounded. She said that she understands how frustrating our situation is and gave my son some advice on how to deal with his ex's behavior. We'll get the report in a couple of days.

    When I told her of my concern for my son and having all these child abuse accusations on his record, even though they've all been unfounded, they are still there, she said that all it shows is that he was investigated 3 separate times by 3 different caseworkers and each time they could find nothing wrong. That's more of a good thing than a bad one. I hope she's right.
    When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "Happy." They told me I didn't understand the assignment. I told them they didn't understand life. - John Lennon

  7. #8107
    FORT Fogey famita's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    3,799

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Lil Bit, adding my prayers and thoughts to your situation. It's no good for anyone. All you can do is remain positive.

    My trouble is that I have not been able to get tv reception since the 12th. The convertor box/my antenna do not work. I have been reading a lot, but miss my shows. I will probably end up w/cable, but hate that I have to go that route.

  8. #8108
    Go Teams! inthegarden's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    2,444

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    famita we have satellite and are having trouble receiving our local channels, they are telling us that they are still having problems with the conversion, but are working on solutions. So, maybe it will just take them awhile to iron all the kinks out. It really ticks me off, because the small TV that I had on my drafting table, I can no longer use and I enjoyed having the TV on while I worked.

    My thoughts are with you Lil BIt

  9. #8109
    Resident curmudgeon Newfherder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Enchanted by a beautiful Soprano
    Posts
    3,163

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by famita;3515998;
    My trouble is that I have not been able to get tv reception since the 12th. The convertor box/my antenna do not work. I have been reading a lot, but miss my shows. I will probably end up w/cable, but hate that I have to go that route.
    If you haven't done it yet, rescan for channels. Some stations moved when the change to digital became permanent.
    "The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination."
    --Marion Zimmer Bradley

  10. #8110
    FORT Fogey famita's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    3,799

    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I rescan about 3 times a day. I'm hopeful, but not optimistic about it now. I especially miss my news programs in the am and the weather updates at night.

+ Reply to Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.