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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #691
    RENThead JLuvs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alphabet Soup
    aw, thanks for letting me know I have someone to talk to about this.

    so about my friends, if my friends found out, i wouldnt have friends, i would be harrassed. and I know, people say well then they aren't your true friend to begin with, but there are some people who have friends that would support them, but for me my friends would be like... "I don't want to hang with him, people will think I'm gay" And as for my family, ehh, they wouldn't be too happy, They wouldn't disown me, but they would probably be dissapointed.

    It's not easy going through sophmore year of highschool being in the closet. It's REALLY tough.
    I really do not envy you. Teaching middle school, 6th grade :phhht --today was a rough day, I have some idea of how rough things can be. I can vivdly remember my high school days and feeling like there was not one group that truly belonged to.

    You did say in your post something of what I was going to say, and I know that it is so cliche, but sometimes cliches are true. They really aren't your friends if they wouldn't support you. I think you could be suprised with your friends. One of my friends, who thought I would totally desert him, was the first person who ever came out to me. I am a pastor's kid and he though for sure that he would lose my friendship if he told me. That was totally not the case. Do you think that some of your friends, deep down, might support you?

    I am glad to hear that your family would not disown you, as it breaks my heart when that happens and I know people it has happened to. It is great that your family seems like they could look past that.

    You can always PM me if you don't want to talk about this on the board.

    I don't think you should come out until you feel comfortable to do it. This is such a personal decision and one that doesn't have a right or wrong answer. The majority of my friends are gay so I can relate in some way and sympathise with what you are going through.

    I hope this helps a bit. I am always here.

  2. #692
    RENThead JLuvs's Avatar
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    Just a little update....my friend who keeps getting misdiagnosed for everything is finally having surgery tomorrow at 4pm.

    Please keep Lisa in your prayers.

    Thanks as usual.

  3. #693
    Too cold to run away! Burntcrow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by weathergirl91
    I was at home, and we were on AIM. She just asked me if I was gonna watch AI4. And I told her I had to study first. Thats when she started telling me how stupid that was. I told her that she didnt have to study, but I was still going to, because I wanted to make sure I understood the chapter. She then ended by telling me that was stupid, and she said that was a mean thing for me to say. Then she logged off, and logged back on. I sent out a group message to everyone, telling them to pray for a snow day. She wrote me asking me if I was trying to piss her off. I said no, and she started saying how stupid and retarded it was that i sent out a group message to people that dont even go to our school. i told her i didnt mean to, and she called me retarded. when i tried to stop her arguing, i told her it seemed like we were both PMSng. She then said it was just me. I said something like, well it seems like we both are. And she said, No i am always like this. then she ended by almost calling me a B**** and she apologized later. She always gets in stupid fights with me, out of nowhere. and then she apologizes. i dont want it to seem like she wins and i always forgive her. but it would be mean not to.
    Weathergirl, try to think of things that you do that might be irritating her It is really easy to look at the other person and call out his/her faults, but not very easy to call out your own. Is there anything you could think of that could be upsetting her?

    If not, and it is all her doing, then I have a feeling that she just has a personal problem with you. If you really want her as your friend, you should sit and have a talk with her. Ask her what is bugging her.

  4. #694
    FORT Fanatic weathergirl91's Avatar
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    Thanks for your advice burntcrow. I thought about it, and when I went back and read the messages, I could have been a little nicer to her. I mean, I wasnt mean, but I wasnt friendly the whole time. Thanks again for your advice! (And JLuvs, I will keep Lisa in my prayers )

  5. #695
    FORT Fogey
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    Hey you guys,

    I hope things are going better for everyone and I'm keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers, too. (I'm not nearly as mean and nasty in real life -- or in this thread -- as I am in Show Discussion threads, so know that I do mean it!)

    Anyway, here's my latest: The Bachelorette Finale killed my television. Really. MY TELEVISION BROKE. It's history. When it happened while the finale was airing I thought it was a fluke and would come back. I find it supremely ironic that it died during the finale of The Bachelorette, 'cause I've been skewering Jen Schefft with my nasty posts all season long!

    It's not THAT bad of a problem, but it's a pain in the neck.

    Speaking of broken things, today I was driving my old, beat-up car (for which I just spent $500 in repairs on Saturday) to the endodontist to get my sore tooth reevaluated and the often-broken car broke yet again!

    So I didn't get my broken tooth checked and I can't replace the broken tv because my often-broken car broke again while I was driving to get my broken tooth checked.

    I'm not really complaining, just venting.

    Anyway, things'll get better soon 'cause I'm shopping around for a "new" (used) vehicle and I've rescheduled the dental appointment.

    I'll feel better as soon as I take a nap.

    Thanks for letting me complain here, though!!!

  6. #696
    Hockey is life! EvaLaruefan's Avatar
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    ((HUGS)) to all of you who need them and hope things get better soon.

    Pom, everyone needs to vent once ina while, you're having a bad day.

  7. #697
    FORT Fanatic weathergirl91's Avatar
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    Pom, that is pretty funny about your television situation. Although thats not good that you probably have to buy a new one. And thats not good about your car either!!! Hopefully your nap helped you calm down about all this "madness" that is currently occuring Sorry to hear about your bad day!

  8. #698
    FORT Fogey
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    Aw shucks, my little troubles are NOTHIN', really. But thanks for letting me vent.

    Hey weathergirl91, I miss the duckies! I loved that av (and I love those birds!). Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and don't worry about me at all -- compared to what other people around here go through, I'm living on Easy Street.

  9. #699
    The new me! Feifer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by weathergirl91
    I was at home, and we were on AIM. She just asked me if I was gonna watch AI4. And I told her I had to study first. Thats when she started telling me how stupid that was. I told her that she didnt have to study, but I was still going to, because I wanted to make sure I understood the chapter. She then ended by telling me that was stupid, and she said that was a mean thing for me to say. Then she logged off, and logged back on. I sent out a group message to everyone, telling them to pray for a snow day. She wrote me asking me if I was trying to piss her off. I said no, and she started saying how stupid and retarded it was that i sent out a group message to people that dont even go to our school. i told her i didnt mean to, and she called me retarded. when i tried to stop her arguing, i told her it seemed like we were both PMSng. She then said it was just me. I said something like, well it seems like we both are. And she said, No i am always like this. then she ended by almost calling me a B**** and she apologized later. She always gets in stupid fights with me, out of nowhere. and then she apologizes. i dont want it to seem like she wins and i always forgive her. but it would be mean not to.
    Wgirl, I think you need to set some really clear boudaries with your friend. She needs to know that you will not put up with her speaking/typing to you in such a hurtful manner. Tell her that you will be more aware of the way you act and convey your thoughts as well. There is no reason for her to put you down for wanting to study and if she is feeling bad about not studying then that is her problem. Everyone has different study methods and needs. This does not make one mentally superior over the other. Anyone who chooses to use words like retarded and put you down over needing/wanting to study needs to crack an extra book or two and learn more appropriate vocabulary to apply to her thoughts and feelings about the situation. Make sure that she knows that you will not tollerate being berated over wanting a better grade or a better life for that matter. A true friend might be offended in the begining but see more clearly later. A person who is not your friend will probably berate you even while you are trying to set the boundaries. Be clear that you do not want to be torn down with many hurtful words just to be brushed of with a simple appology that seems hallow later. She needs to show that she cares for you every day in the words and actions she chooses. If she can not do that then maybe you are better of without her. You deserve to be surrounded by people who will build you up instead of tearing you down and be honest with you when you are not doing your part. This honesty does not include hurtful remarks. Remember to talk to her the way you want to be talked to and you just might get through to your friend and have her for a long time to come. If she does not get it then let her cool down. If she still does not get it then let her move on to use someone else as a verbal punching bag. She will learn in time. Remember that we tell people how we want to be treated by letting them treat us that way. This is why setting boundaries is so important. People can not hurt you if you dot allow them to. Make good choices and expect othes to as well.
    It occurred to me that no matter how bleak things might seem at times, at least I have a head. ----Stargazer

  10. #700
    FORT Fogey CharlieBug's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pomeraniac
    Aw shucks, my little troubles are NOTHIN', really. But thanks for letting me vent.
    Pom, you know you can vent here at any time. What a frustrating day you had! Sometimes "when it rains, it pours" - of course that only applies to problems!

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