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  1. #6451
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    brunette trixie: I hope you feel better soon and can attend your friends wedding!

    Bubbydoll: My parents let each of us live at home for several years while we were working so we could save money to put towards a home. We paid a % of our income for rent and food, still helped with chores around the house, bought our own clothes and such and had to save 1/2 of our cheques each month. It was one of the smartest things they did. None of us were ever in debt, knew we had to have money in order to buy anything major, or take a vacation (never put on a credit card), and my parents invested the money we paid them for rent all those years. Then, once we had moved out and were still saving like we did at home, we were all able to get a downpayment down on a home. We learned to live below our means, so we never got into financial trouble. I don't think it matters whether you come from money or not. It matters how responsible you are with your money.
    ------------------

    My little bad news is that I've gotten a case of hives. Swollen, itchy, red hives! I spoke to the nurse at Dr. Bernsteins and we think I'm very allergic to possibly the vitamins or lidocane in the combination shot I've been getting because I have fibromyalgia and CFS. So we're trying just the B6-B12 shots now. I haven't had anything new surface all day! Hopefully, the rest will just heal up in time. Meanwhile, I'm taking benedryl, and spraying the benedryl itch relief stuff on several times a day.
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  2. #6452
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by misskitty;3126842;
    brunette trixie: I hope you feel better soon and can attend your friends wedding!

    Bubbydoll: My parents let each of us live at home for several years while we were working so we could save money to put towards a home. We paid a % of our income for rent and food, still helped with chores around the house, bought our own clothes and such and had to save 1/2 of our cheques each month. It was one of the smartest things they did. None of us were ever in debt, knew we had to have money in order to buy anything major, or take a vacation (never put on a credit card), and my parents invested the money we paid them for rent all those years. Then, once we had moved out and were still saving like we did at home, we were all able to get a downpayment down on a home. We learned to live below our means, so we never got into financial trouble. I don't think it matters whether you come from money or not. It matters how responsible you are with your money.
    ------------------

    My little bad news is that I've gotten a case of hives. Swollen, itchy, red hives! I spoke to the nurse at Dr. Bernsteins and we think I'm very allergic to possibly the vitamins or lidocane in the combination shot I've been getting because I have fibromyalgia and CFS. So we're trying just the B6-B12 shots now. I haven't had anything new surface all day! Hopefully, the rest will just heal up in time. Meanwhile, I'm taking benedryl, and spraying the benedryl itch relief stuff on several times a day.
    Hives are the worst. I hope you are better soon. I get them if a cat touches me and I get them after certain foods, but I can't find the trigger food yet.

    Do you do your own B-12 shots? I do my own, but I always leave a bruise.
    I got a shot on Thur. and I get this shot every 3 months, but this month, the nurse, really nailed me. It's the same nurse too. I don't know what she did, but I could barely sit down Thur. night and my hip is still sore today. I could tell she wasn't feeling well that day, so don't know if that had anything to do with it. But I felt like I had been hit with buckshot and not a needle!

    Feel better Miss Kitty.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  3. #6453
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbydoll;3126808;
    Thanks to all who further replied to my questions and thoughts ..

    I agree, he is being an immature boy when he should be a responsible MAN at almost 25 yrs old! *sighs* I called him on it and he got extremely pissy with me! Sort of, how dare you tell me how I should react and relate to my mom!

    I told him I am about 5 yrs younger and I pay my parents rent, I have made almost 400 dollars in l.distance calls in the last 8 months, and I paid for them all myself on a calling card, so it never goes onto my parents phone bill. I pay for my own movies and share of the tv, and computer bill, I buy my own groceries, extra I may want, and I buy everything my pet needs..I don't expect or want my parents paying any of this for me. I am happy I can live at home, and help them out as they help me. And I would NEVER feel good taking advantage of them when I am now working full time and can help out.
    I said he should make his l.distance calls on his cell or buy calling cards like I do, and I said he should pay some rent.. he doesn't even pay for his own food, his mom does for him and he doesn't use a credit card, and doesn't have to make any car payments either, he even gives her a list of what he wants for food etc and she buys it.. *sighs again*

    He claims his mom and step dad are very well off, so money to them isn't an issue to make him pay, and I tried to explain to him, "Thats not the point" have some freaking pride, why don't you! To which his pissiness came out at me.
    I said to him, I am losing a lot of respect for you" which I felt bad saying but I was feeling it so I told him.
    How do you slap sense into someone like that, if his own mom lets him get away with all the freebies? I think he is hoarding a lot of money for himself right now, because he has an excellent job and makes better money than I do..

    I don't think his mom will kick him out, he won't move out until he finishes his degree in another year, maybe? His poor mom.

    You are a good and respectful son who is not imposing on/taking advantage of your parents. You, obviously, were well raised. I am sure your parents are very proud of you. You are a completely "different ballgame" than the kids that we would not want to get stuck with! Good for you!

    If I were you, I'd just stay out of your sluggard friend's pathetic issues. This also has a lot to do with the way he was raised. I guess Mom can be a doormat, if she wants to!
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  4. #6454
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbydoll;3126808;
    Thanks to all who further replied to my questions and thoughts ..

    I agree, he is being an immature boy when he should be a responsible MAN at almost 25 yrs old! *sighs* I called him on it and he got extremely pissy with me! Sort of, how dare you tell me how I should react and relate to my mom!

    I told him I am about 5 yrs younger and I pay my parents rent, I have made almost 400 dollars in l.distance calls in the last 8 months, and I paid for them all myself on a calling card, so it never goes onto my parents phone bill. I pay for my own movies and share of the tv, and computer bill, I buy my own groceries, extra I may want, and I buy everything my pet needs..I don't expect or want my parents paying any of this for me. I am happy I can live at home, and help them out as they help me. And I would NEVER feel good taking advantage of them when I am now working full time and can help out.
    I said he should make his l.distance calls on his cell or buy calling cards like I do, and I said he should pay some rent.. he doesn't even pay for his own food, his mom does for him and he doesn't use a credit card, and doesn't have to make any car payments either, he even gives her a list of what he wants for food etc and she buys it.. *sighs again*

    He claims his mom and step dad are very well off, so money to them isn't an issue to make him pay, and I tried to explain to him, "Thats not the point" have some freaking pride, why don't you! To which his pissiness came out at me.
    I said to him, I am losing a lot of respect for you" which I felt bad saying but I was feeling it so I told him.
    How do you slap sense into someone like that, if his own mom lets him get away with all the freebies? I think he is hoarding a lot of money for himself right now, because he has an excellent job and makes better money than I do..

    I don't think his mom will kick him out, he won't move out until he finishes his degree in another year, maybe? His poor mom.
    You don't. You've said your piece and saw how he reacted. His mom and stepdad are either going to let it go on or tell him to move out and it will be at the point where none of them speak to each other for years afterwards.

    And honestly, it's really their business, not yours. I know you care for your friend, but it really is his business and his mom's. I have learned over the years that sometimes you just need to stay out of other people's problems because then they get mad at YOU. Now if you were dating this guy and wanted to have a more serious relationship, then maybe you could talk to him honestly about his living arrangements as how they relate to your romantic relationship, but quite honestly, I wouldn't date this guy. If this is how he treats his mother, I would be very leary of how he would treat his girlfriend and future wife. This living arrangement would be a huge red flag to me if I were in the dating scene with him.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  5. #6455
    Trouble in my life just1paul's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;3127413;
    You don't. You've said your piece and saw how he reacted. His mom and stepdad are either going to let it go on or tell him to move out and it will be at the point where none of them speak to each other for years afterwards.

    And honestly, it's really their business, not yours. I know you care for your friend, but it really is his business and his mom's. I have learned over the years that sometimes you just need to stay out of other people's problems because then they get mad at YOU. Now if you were dating this guy and wanted to have a more serious relationship, then maybe you could talk to him honestly about his living arrangements as how they relate to your romantic relationship, but quite honestly, I wouldn't date this guy. If this is how he treats his mother, I would be very leary of how he would treat his girlfriend and future wife. This living arrangement would be a huge red flag to me if I were in the dating scene with him.

    All I can say is AMEN SISTER! I can tell so many stories of people getting mad at me, finally I learned to SHUT THE HECK UP.

  6. #6456
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by gabriel;3127443;
    All I can say is AMEN SISTER! I can tell so many stories of people getting mad at me, finally I learned to SHUT THE HECK UP.
    Me too. Great lesson to have learned isn't it?
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  7. #6457
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    ...but just think of stirring the pot. Sometimes......

  8. #6458
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    For some who-knows-why reason, I thought Bubbydoll was a guy!!! Maybe it was the name "Bubby", in my brain translating to "Bubba"? My most sincere apologies, Bubby! Guess you're not such a great son, after all, are you!?! Well, I still want to congratulate you on being such a good role model for young people moving back home, and doing the right thing. Keep your blood pressure down by staying out of your nutjob friend's dysfunctional family business; the more you stay in it, the more the likelihood that they will find a way to make something your fault..........but live and learn, if you must! Most of us have!

    (You know, I was having trouble understanding why a guy would be so off into his buddy's business like it sounded like you were! Geez....Shay's brain fart strikes again! )
    Last edited by prhoshay; 07-13-2008 at 11:53 AM.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  9. #6459
    Best Buddies Gutmutter's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Bubbydoll - is your friend by any chance Italian? It may be a cultural thing. They have a tradition of sons staying with the mom and dad into adulthood.
    Count your blessings!

  10. #6460
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by famita;3127497;
    ...but just think of stirring the pot. Sometimes......
    I never thought of you as a pot stirrer.

    I have never understood some of the people I know that like to stir up trouble sometimes. I've watched it, I've had them try to get me involved in it.
    In fact, someone is trying to pull me into that situation right now and I have made it VERY clear, I am NOT interested. I am NOT talking about the other person involved. I would like to be totally LEFT out of it. I'm 46 years old, I am fairly happy with my life. I have some good friends and I don't need to revisit highschool and have complete and utter chaos reign because the other person involved has the maturity level of a 14 year old (no offense to any 14 year olds).

    I happen to like both people involved and would like to be friends with both of them and I don't need trouble and I don't need to be in the middle. Fortunately the other one feels like I do, but I'm starting to like the pot stirrer less and less because of her insistance to keep trying to drag me into it.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

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