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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #4681
    Premium Member burntbrat's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I agree with Lucy. A PSAT is just a practice. It seems like all your concerns about your friends and other things in your life might be clouding your mind. Just take a deep breath, calm down, do the best you can. You're a good person and a good student and one test isn't going to mess up your life. Even if you do poorly on your real SAT's, you can take them again. Concentrate on getting good grades and being involved in activities that will look good on college applications. You'll be fine, I promise
    One of these days I'll stop being sensitive. Until then, I'll continue to be devastated on a daily basis. Life breaks my heart.

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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    This morning I called great Aunt Ruth and told her I am gay. It was a little tough, but I am glad I did. She has a good memory, because she knew that I struggled with the thought, but thought that I wasn't. She said are you sure?? I told her yes. Her first reponse was there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Then she said she is not sure she is convinced.

    I actually really can understand why she thought this, because I went through so many years of denial with family and I told her that was part of the problem. Then she said some the nicest people she knows our gay.

    Then she said one of her good friends son is gay

    I think If more people knew I think I would be comfortable & much happier. I think need to leave a somewhat "out" lifestyle. Guess what Aunt Ruth could careless that I am gay, I think it bothers me more then anyone. I think having such a supportive group on here made me want to tell her.

    Thanks guys
    Last edited by snarkattack; 08-30-2007 at 09:27 AM.

  3. #4683
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    snark I'm so thrilled for you that you decided to take the plunge and let Aunt Ruth know that you are gay. I know that had to be a weight lifted off your shoulder. And bless her for being so understanding!

    My ex husband is gay and I know he told me that once he started telling people, he felt like he could breathe again....to not tell others he said it always felt like something was pressing down on him and at times made him feel like he was suffocating.

    Hopefully this will help you in your quest to try and relieve some of the anxiety you feel.....

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  4. #4684
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Congrats snark! From what you have said, that was a HUGE step/risk you just took - you deserve applause!! I think her response was just perfect - she sounds like such a special lady!
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    Premium Member burntbrat's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I'm very proud of you snarkattack! That took a lot of courage. I hope this opens up doors for other opportunities to improve your life and become closer to your friends and family.
    One of these days I'll stop being sensitive. Until then, I'll continue to be devastated on a daily basis. Life breaks my heart.

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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    It took a great deal of courage to be honest with your aunt, snarkattack. I'm so glad that you're feeling better. Honesty is always the best policy.

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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Wow Snark, I'm loving your Aunt Ruth more everyday!

    That took guts and I'm willing to bet it was a relief for you. Here's wishing you continued courage and acceptance from more of your family and friends.

    I think a lot of people could take lessons from your Aunt Ruth. What a lady and you are lucky to have her. And could it be possible that she will help others in your family be more accepting? She sounds like she would tell them all just exactly what she feels and why.

    Wishing you all the best.
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  8. #4688
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucy;2551206;
    11stephanie, there is no need to stress about a PSAT. I don't remember it determining anything in school, and I barely remember even taking it. It's just practice for YOU, so you know what the SATs look like when they come around (next year, right?). There's no need to panic, you've been preparing for years already without even knowing it, just by learning in your classes.
    I do remember taking it, and yes, I remember freaking out prior to the test. (I was a really good student but a big-time worrier about everything!) But the thing is, Lucy is absolutley correct - it doesn't affect anything at all as far as school goes. Basically, I think of it as a practice test, so you get to know how the forms look, what the questions will be like, how to manage your time on the timed portions, how to deal with pre-test stress, etc. It's not so much about getting the answers correct as it is getting familiar with the testing environment. The PSATs/SATs/ACTs are different than your normal regular standardized testing that the school gives you every year. They just want you to have the oportunity to see what these tests will be like, so that next year when it does count, you won't be going through this type of freak-out.

    Don't worry, you'll be fine. Just do some pre-test focus groups, de-stress a bit, and try to make the most of this experience! Remember that what you learn about the tests now will help you next year! For the record, my oldest daughter took the ACT this last February as part of the DUKE TIP program (she was 7th grade at the time) and did extremely well. She had a practice workbook, a pre-test class sponsored by her school, and did a bunch of study groups with her friends prior to the test. The focus all along was to do the best they could, but to not stress and to not worry about the end results, just to get familiar with the testing environment. It worked for her, so I think you'll be 10 times better off if you can just let some of the stress go.

    Snark, your Auntie Ruth is one amazing lady. And I am so happy you were able to open up and talk to her about your life. I cannot imagine how hard it must be to have your personal life feel like a huge "secret" all the time, to everyone, even close friends and family. The stress and pressure must be unbearable. I am glad you are taking steps to unburden yourself of those weights, and honesty about who you are to friends and family will allow you to strengthen, or even develop in some cases, those relationships and bonds. You're doing a brave and wonderful thing, and I wish you the best in all that you do.

  9. #4689
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    You are getting some good advice 11sstephanie. As I remember, the only thing the PSAT counted for was National Merit Scholarships. Otherwise, it is just good practice for the SAT.
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    The PSAT is like a warm-up test. When you get your scores, you'll know what you need to work on before you take the SAT, which you can take more than once, BTW. Don't sweat it. The only thing that's life and death is life and death.
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

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