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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #4621
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by myrosiedog;2537593;
    Family members can be funny. My 85 year old aunt is like that. She loves Barrack Obama but hates other African-Americans. I just let it go in one ear and out the other. But she has some opinions and I just have to laugh. I mean, she's completely serious, but they are just funny to me.
    Too Funny. Families are probably the most politically incorrect people in the world. I am embarrassed how some of my relatives talk. I always think how we pick apart people on tv if they are not totally PC. But in life most people are not.

    Sorry to hear about all your health problems. Thinking of you.
    Last edited by snarkattack; 08-21-2007 at 01:27 PM.

  2. #4622
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Newf-how deviously hilarious! I personally that one is a winner!!

    Snark-it is nice to see the generation gap not matter. Just after she gives you something and you don't want it, try to remember to forget to take it with you. That might even save on the clutter (if any) in your home.

    MRD- try to keep laughing and don't say "What else can happen?". I'm afraid you might find out. Sending good thoughts your way!

  3. #4623
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    mrd - You know my hugs and prayers are always with you.

    snarkattack - People are just funny, period. I wish you the best in connecting with your aunt (and any others) in the good ways you can.

  4. #4624
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by lei;2537721;
    mrd - You know my hugs and prayers are always with you.

    snarkattack - People are just funny, period. I wish you the best in connecting with your aunt (and any others) in the good ways you can.
    Thanks Lei. I'm hanging in, looking for a witch doctor to lift my curse.

    I agree, people are so funny. I think that's why I get such a kick out of observing people and talking to strangers (and those odd family memebers) as you just can't make some of this stuff up that happens.

    I think I get "accosted" so much because I am fairly observant and I don't stare at the ground or not make eye contact with people. But I love nothing more than to sit on a bench downtown and people watch. It's better than tv some days. But it does get me in odd situations sometimes. But human nature is just very interesting to me.
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  5. #4625
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I know a good witch Dr......... Wait I thought you meant something else, I wouldn't be a good person to ask to lift a curse.
    There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved- George Sand

  6. #4626
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I know this isn't the best place to vent this, but I jsut don't care anymore. I am going to 28 in about 2 months. And since I was 16 years old I have had the same obsession. I am worried that my voice sounds gay. The thought won't go away, and it seems like every possible thing I do it always gets in the way. Its bothers me every second of every day.

    I mean 3 years ago I was hospitalized for OCD, but I also have problems with my sexuality. It was a tough time, but I have gotten a lot better since then. If you thought I sound bad now. You should of seen me 3 years ago. Before I was hospitalized I literally did not talk for 2 years. I truly became a MUTE. I mean if I had to I would talk to my parents, but I was too worried that they thought my voice sounded gay.

    Although I don't have problems talking freely in conversations I keep myself limited in certain situations. I know this sounds crazy, but even when I am in gay clubs I won't talk to people, because I am worried my voice will sound effimine or sterotypically gay.

    I have gone to Community College some, but dropped out. I went back to register again, but couldn't complete the process because I was totally consumed with people that were registering would think I sounded gay. I emailed a gay support group, they haven't me back(its been a week) but I couldn't call because I was worried my voice sounds gay.

    I have no job, no real friends, no college degree. And I collect freakin' disability

    Sometimes I wonder what more does my head want from me? I sat in the shower for one hour yesterday crying, today I was in bed for 1 hour crying. All I can do is run outside.

    I see a therapist twice a week. I keep reading self help books, I am on medication. But this same freakin thought has stuck with me for 14 years! Eveyday it pops in.

    I am a nice kid, but growing angry by the day. I guess I am so ashamed that I am a homsexual, that I have dropped out of life. I am a nice looking kid, but I live like a freakin' pig. I finally decided to clean my apartment, after I realized I was having bug problems. Going to the grocery store is a struggle. Everything thing is with this dumb obsession.

    The thing is if you saw me in the street. You would never guess how screwed up I am. I just look healthy. The sad thing is if you saw me interviewed me on LKL they would say he has one of the most masculine voices I know. My voice sounds radioish. Its amazes the torture your head can put you through.

    And now I have to go my cousins house so I can pick up a dumb computer screen, because Aunt Ruth needs a stupid tax deduction.

    I really don't know how people should respond to this. I just needed to vent. I am drained, exhausted, and tired. I wake up at 5am(and that's when the torture begins, its been like this for 14 years) I mean my therapist calls me back with this, and some of the other issues I am having and I can tell he is concerned and feels bad. You know are messed up when your therapist is calling you on days you don't meet with him, just to see if I am doing okay.

    If I wasn't on disability. I would be homeless(no joke)
    Last edited by snarkattack; 08-22-2007 at 02:34 PM.

  7. #4627
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Do you mean, effeminate? Don't worry about such things. My mom has a slight 'stache(but i don't tell her). Just be confident and be you.
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  8. #4628
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I know this may sound trite, but there is nothing wrong with being gay, and there is nothing to be ashamed of either. And I don't believe being gay is a choice, but rather how one is born. So that's like me loathing myself for being a woman (which I don't--I rather enjoy it, truth be told!). Or someone else hating themselves for being Latino. There's nothing we can do about some things. So we just have to figure out how to make the best of what we've been dealt. But from what you've written, your main source of concern seems to be that you're gay, you don't like being perceived as gay and worry about how others will view you. (Don't worry about them. The ones who'll dislike you for being gay aren't worth your time. They're the same people who don't like fat people, or black people or people who aren't exactly like them...)

    Some of my best best friends are gay men. Some of them look and sound just like any hetero male. Others are more effeminate and girly, and I love them all (as do their boyfriends!). What does your therapist say about your being fearful of people hearing your "gay" voice? And why do you think you worry so much about sounding gay? (Although you mention later that you actually have a deep, masculine voice.) I've come to learn that a lot of men who I assumed were gay weren't, just as many men I assumed were hetero were in reality gay. I'm guessing that most people don't know (or care) about your sexuality. But that they would like to get to know you as a person regardless.

    Sometimes it can be overwhelming to tackle everything at once. I find that when my house is in order, it's easier for me to get everything I need to get done. So, maybe you can set aside a day or two to clean and organize your home. (Ask a family member to help you if seems to be too much for you to tackle alone.) From there, you can tackle other things one at a time...

  9. #4629
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    snarkattack I hope you've mentioned to your therapist your hangup about your voice. And if you've been going to the same doctor for a long period of time and haven't made any progress, try another therapist. But from your post it seems to me that it's not your voice that's the problem, it's your sexuality. If you didn't care whether or not people thought you were gay, you wouldn't care if they thought your voice was gay. I'm sure going to a support group will help you. So instead of emailing them find out when they meet and then join in. And you're going to have to eventually accept who you are. Quit being ashamed. You're gay. So what?? Your voice may or may not sound stereotypically gay. Again, so what? It's not the sound of your voice that matters, but the words that you say.
    One of these days I'll stop being sensitive. Until then, I'll continue to be devastated on a daily basis. Life breaks my heart.

  10. #4630
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by burntbrat;2539551;
    It's not the sound of your voice that matters, but the words that you say.
    Wow. I love this statement. It's so true...for all of us...

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