Talk about your troubles

[prhoshay]

myrosiedog, God bless you. I'll send up a few for you. You and hubby park that SUV any-dang-where you want! Drive around that lot as many times as you want, and I won't make a joke about it. Promise.


ANTM Mega Fan , try to remember that the high road is the best road to take. You don't act ugly just because someone else is acting ugly. Try to familiarize yourself with the rules of the library so that you can, maybe, understand where she is coming from, and teach your sister. I, like you, love libraries! How wonderful that you are helping your sister with her reading! That's impressive!!

And don't listen to rumors; there is usually not much truth in them. People are usually just trying to get you to go ballistic so that they can laugh at you and talk about you more. Remember the saying, "Believe half of what you see, and none of what you hear." Remember that you are more than just a reading tutor to your sister. She's watching everything that you do, and she will be imitating it; make sure she represents you well!

[MRD]

myrosiedog, God bless you. I'll send up a few for you. You and hubby park that SUV any-dang-where you want! Drive around that lot as many times as you want, and I won't make a joke about it. Promise.


ANTM Mega Fan , try to remember that the high road is the best road to take. You don't act ugly just because someone else is acting ugly. Try to familiarize yourself with the rules of the library so that you can, maybe, understand where she is coming from, and teach your sister. I, like you, love libraries! How wonderful that you are helping your sister with her reading! That's impressive!!

And don't listen to rumors; there is usually not much truth in them. People are usually just trying to get you to go ballistic so that they can laugh at you and talk about you more. Remember the saying, "Believe half of what you see, and none of what you hear." Remember that you are more than just a reading tutor to your sister. She's watching everything that you do, and she will be imitating it; make sure she represents you well!

Thanks Photshay, I appreciate it. I'm not an SUV driver. We have a sedan. I'm one of the SUV haters on here. Shhhhh, don't want to start ANYMORE trouble about that subject.

[ANTM Mega Fan]

Thank you prhoshay.

I'm going to bake a basket of lemon bars, and give them to her. Hopefully she'll feel guilty and stop being mean.

And no, I'm not joking either.

[MRD]

Thank you prhoshay.

I'm going to bake a basket of lemon bars, and give them to her. Hopefully she'll feel guilty and stop being mean.

And no, I'm not joking either.

That is a great idea! Don't lower yourself to her level. Take the high road and you will always know that YOU have done the right thing even if no one else knows about it. But doing to her what she did to you only makes it worse.
And sometimes when you are nice to someone like that out of the blue, they are shocked into better behavior. Good luck

[Muduh]

But think about this. If there is bad blood there, baking something for her may not be the best idea. I would probably prefer to give her a rose, or carnation or something, in a bud vase. Food, homemade especially, might not be the wisest choice.

Just my opinion, for what little it's worth. If someone I didn't get along with brought me food, out of the blue, you couldn't pay me to eat it.

[just1paul]

But think about this. If there is bad blood there, baking something for her may not be the best idea. I would probably prefer to give her a rose, or carnation or something, in a bud vase. Food, homemade especially, might not be the wisest choice.

Just my opinion, for what little it's worth. If someone I didn't get along with brought me food, out of the blue, you couldn't pay me to eat it.

That actually happened to me once. I couldn't stand this woman at at place I worked at and I didn't do anything other than not talk to her, but one day she showed up with something (I think it was cookies or something) and said I baked these for you to enjoy, I looked at her and said now just why would you do that? and dropped them into the trash.

[Amanda]

Wow. With all due respect, that must have made her feel horrible.

I hope all of you work your way through your troubles with the happiest possible outcome.

[snoopy]

I agree with everyone's advice to ANTM, but sometimes people who are so antaganistic (sp?) like that do not respond to the so called "high road" since they were raised like animals. In other words, they have no idea what "normal" behavior consists of. My best friend from highschool , who is STILL my best friend 22 years later was left on her own at age 14 when her mother met a wealthy man (her abusive father left them when she was 12) and the man did not want her. So the mom left her in a house by herself for 6 months while she went to live the high life jet setting with this new man. I met her when she came to my highschool because a neighbor called DSS (Department of Social Services) and reported a minor living alone. Then and ONLY then did her "mother" move her in with her new boyfriend and her and made my friend go to a new school.(mine) If not for that, Debbie would have stayed alone with zero parental supervision or support for who knows how long. She came to our school with a social stigmatism,(and one hell of a bad attitude) and all the "cool" kids ostracized her because bad news travels fast in highschool. In fact, I also had a bad opinion of her because I heard she was "loose". That rumor started because it was said that she lived with a guy. Well, in fact, she lived with her boyfriend's family because they learned that she had been abandoned by her parents, literally. Her mother (and I use that term loosely) took her in only after the boyfriend beat her up. Oh, and DSS was gonna jail her for neglect if she didn't take her back in. Could I go on? Yes. But you get the idea. I would have been like the other typical kids in my school and shunned her except for one thing. My Dad saw her walking to school one day, and as the exceptional person that I now know he is, he stopped (against my vehement protests) to pick her up. (I had missed the bus, as usual.) He saw a beautiful girl where others saw only defiance. He saw a girl who had already walked a mile so far just to get to the very school that he had to DRAG his own daughter to. I only saw the new girl who all the guys talked about, and all the girls hated because of that. God forbid that the "in" crowd saw me arriving at school with HER. Well, to make a long story short, I actually made one of the three best friends of my entire life because of that choice my dad made to pick her up that day. I got in the one and only fist fight of my life over defending her to her detractors. I learned that one "real" friend can take the place of one hundred "social" friends. This is the longest post ever, but ANTM's issue with "the bitch" resonated memories deep in me about one of my dearest friends, who everyone saw as an "evil bitch" when in fact she was just be a very vulnerable, wounded girl who no one valued. That kind of neglect can create a hard shell around a child who has to protect herself since no is there to do it for her. But by the same token, as a result of their abuse or neglect, they will only respond to tough attitudes. Kindness breeds distrust in someone who has never been on the recieving end of kindness. That is why I disagree with the "killing her with kindness" theory. Give her as good as she gives you. She will be shocked that you thought enough about it or that you were smart enough or cared enough not to do the "expected". To kids who raise themselves, trusting a stranger is a weakness. For that matter, kindness is a weakness. They can't accept weakness, since that would equal certain failure. You give that girl what she's asking for- ask her why she's an "evil bitch"- she just may be more than happy that someone cared enough to ask, and you will have just learned your first major life lesson. NEVER take anyone at face value, good, bad, or indifferent. People are complex, and you can usually find good in a "bad" person and bad in a "good" person. OK, lecture over.

[prhoshay]

Glad to hear your dad took the high road.

[hepcat]

But wait, are you saying the librarian started a rumor about you? She would be risking her job, I'm sure.

Can't you just ignore the librarian and find a quiet corner to do your reading? Libraries usually have tables and desks in all kinds of nooks and crannies.

I'm sorry to sound so simplistic - I'm just puzzled.