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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #2861
    MRD
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    Well, hubby is ok, but is going to need sinus surgery. He has a sinus infection which has inflamed polyps in his nose and sinuses. What happened today was that when he blew his nose, part of a polyp broke loose and when it did, it caused a lot of bleeding. He saw the body tissue in the tissue and then the resulting nosebleed and that scared him enough to go to the ER. They scoped his nose and he has other polyps that need to be removed, but they have to get the infection cleared up first, so he's on antibiotics and a steriod nasal spray.
    Nothing serious, but man, when he says he has to go to the ER, its a huge signal to me something is wrong as the man won't even go to the dr.


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    JLuvs, my prayers continue to be with your friend. I am so sorry to hear this. It's very hard news to take. I know from experience. Prayers for him, you and his family and friends.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  2. #2862
    giz
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    Myrosie, that must have been pretty scary for him. I'm glad it's nothing too serious. Well, I told everyone about my mum being diagnosed with alzheimer's, but am so exhausted I can't remember if I mentioned that she had also been conned out of her life savings. They have caught and arrested the guy, but they have also let him go as they don't have enough room to house all these &%^$, and so he has to promise to appear IF the Crown decides to prosecute! I've got to spend the next week or more trying to secure her bank accounts so that he doesn't steal her pension cheque when it comes in. Yesterday (before he was arrested) he was trying to get her to get a huge cash advance on her Visa as he'd left her with nothing in her bank accounts!

    So I need to think things are going to get better for me, somehow, soon! My ex-husband (who has contributed to my life going into nose-dive by leaving me and the kids six months ago) said that it might get worse!! Started going on about how the whole situation with mum might get even worse and how I've got to stop hiding my head in the sand. Argh! I tried to explain that I need to think positively but he just went on and on like Eeyore until I finally had to say "I've got to go now, you're making me feel worse", and hung up! What do you guys think? Statistically, aren't I due for something nice???

  3. #2863
    MRD
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    Giz, that's awful. I hope they can prosecute these scumbags that prey on the elderly.

    Statistically I know nothing about. But I can say that I went through a pretty bleak 2 year period in my life where I thought nothing good would ever happen to me again. That was 5 years ago and I emerged from it stronger, and better than ever and able to endure another seemingly endless period of trouble better than before. I lost my beloved grandmother in July 99. She was 93, but had always lived with us and my daughter is named for her. 3 weeks later, my dad died right in my arms. 3 weeks after that, our dog of 11 years died. I then had a somewhat period of calm for 6 months and my mom was diagnosed with cancer. She died 18 months after my dad. I then had a miscarriage 3 months later. I thought my life had ENDED. I never thought I would ever be happy again. But it does get better.
    Life is like a rollercoaster with ups and downs and believe me, if we didn't have the downs, we wouldn't appreciate the ups so much.

    It will get better. It very well may get worse before it does. But there is truth in that saying: what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. I never believed that before, but I do now.

    It will get better. Keep your chin up, but be prepared in case it doesn't get better soon. There is light at the end of your tunnel and its not an oncoming train!
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  4. #2864
    giz
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    Thanks, MyRosie,
    I don't know if I can do another year and half of this (can't imagine how you got through two years)! Well, my husband was horrible to me before he moved out, so I guess I have had my two years. I'm just trying really hard not to get depressed about this. I have zero energy level, and I'm kind of concerned about that. I lay in bed this morning (after taking the kids to school) for an hour, and wouldn't have gotten up if I hadn't had to take my son for his asthma test. Hopefully it's just the shock of the whole situation, and I'll feel better in a few days. Can you imagine how twisted someone has to be to take the life savings of a little old lady? My mum doesn't own property, she's been working class her whole life. He cleaned her out and then was going to get her into debt by using up her Visa limit. I'm sorry it happened, but at least we caught it before he got this month's pension cheque. I hope the Crown prosecutes him, I'll find out tomorrow if the police are going to charge him, then they have to see if the crown will prosecute! They keep saying that as she gave him the money voluntarily they might not be able to do anything!! Never mind that he lied to her as to why, and that her capacity is severely diminished. Well, hopefully they will prosecute, because I want him punished - in a biblical sense!! I did get them to put a restraining order on him, so if he contacts her he can be re-arrested, so that's something.

  5. #2865
    MRD
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    Quote Originally Posted by giz View Post
    Thanks, MyRosie,
    I don't know if I can do another year and half of this (can't imagine how you got through two years)! Well, my husband was horrible to me before he moved out, so I guess I have had my two years. I'm just trying really hard not to get depressed about this. I have zero energy level, and I'm kind of concerned about that. I lay in bed this morning (after taking the kids to school) for an hour, and wouldn't have gotten up if I hadn't had to take my son for his asthma test. Hopefully it's just the shock of the whole situation, and I'll feel better in a few days. Can you imagine how twisted someone has to be to take the life savings of a little old lady? My mum doesn't own property, she's been working class her whole life. He cleaned her out and then was going to get her into debt by using up her Visa limit. I'm sorry it happened, but at least we caught it before he got this month's pension cheque. I hope the Crown prosecutes him, I'll find out tomorrow if the police are going to charge him, then they have to see if the crown will prosecute! They keep saying that as she gave him the money voluntarily they might not be able to do anything!! Never mind that he lied to her as to why, and that her capacity is severely diminished. Well, hopefully they will prosecute, because I want him punished - in a biblical sense!! I did get them to put a restraining order on him, so if he contacts her he can be re-arrested, so that's something.

    THose kind of people have no conscious, they are sociopaths and don't care who they hurt to get what they want. They have no thought for anyone but themselves.
    I'm so sorry you are going through this on top of everything else.
    But what I told you was not to elicit sympathy for me, but to illustrate that you can dig deep down inside yourself and get through ANYTHING. What is the alternate? You have kids, so you can't afford the luxury of wallowing in self pity. And that is what eventually brought me out of my funk. I had a daughter that needed me and I could not let the events in my life shut me down as long as she needed me.
    You will get through this and it will make you a stronger person in the end and you will show through example to your children that when life gets tough, you still keep on keeping on and don't let it drag you into a bottle or a drug habit or anything else. Life is tough, but fortunately the hard times are punctuated by moments of shear bliss and your kids right now are that bliss you need to keep going.
    I don't know how it works in Canada, but I would definetly keep checking in with the authorities about this predator that took advantage of your mother. Get some professional advice about proving her dimished capacity and how it was taken advantage of.

    And anyone else that reads this that has an aging parent, friend or relative. If you see them diminishing in capacity, talk to them frankly about their bank accounts and who has access and if a close friend or relative can be trusted to be put on the account so that they can help prevent things like this from happening. It's hard for the person who has to give up the independence and freedom, but it ultimately will help protect them in the end.

    Giz, keep your chin up. You know everyone here is pulling for you and it won't always be like this. Take a break for yourself if only to go get a coffee. You need to keep yourself going and find moments where you can get a smile even during the darkest times. Laughter truly is the best medicine.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  6. #2866
    giz
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    My kids do give me a lot of joy, that's for sure. When I get feeling a little overwhelmed by everything, it's always when they are at school. They are both just so cheerful and so sweet that I can't feel too sorry for myself when they are in my life (and around!).

    I've got my lawyer on the case. If they don't charge him tomorrow they will be hearing from her, and she is fierce! Sometimes, apparently, they need to be motivated.

    I sure wish I had known there was the potential for this to happen to my mum! It never in a million years would have occurred to me that someone would do this. So yes, everyone with aging parents, keep an eye on them and their finances. In Canada I'd recommend getting a Representation Agreement in place so that if you need to manage their person or their finances everything's ready to go. Power of Attorney would still give my mum total access to her remaining money, and sadly she could still give it away, so POA will not help in this case.

    I decided that what will make me happy is lots of flowers in the house, so tonight I got 2 dozen roses for $5!! Also I want a decent vacation (saving for that), and down the road a partner to share my life with. That one can wait though!

  7. #2867
    MRD
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    Dh still can't shake the sinus infection he's had for a week that sent him to the ER.
    And now he's shared it with me.

    It's so freaking hot out that when I do muster up the energy to go out, it just makes my head feel that much worse. I hate being cooped up, but I'm nowhere nearly as sick as he is, so I should be thankful.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

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    My problems seem so small and meaningless compared to you guys'. Well, my favorite dress is now a lovely tattered tablecloth, thanks to Ms. Hell, my roommate's lil sister.

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    Stars. I have to ask...how did that happen? I've got visions of little girl with scissors, splashes of bleach, or just having a conniption(sp) fit.

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    Update

    I have a little good news.

    For now, I don't have to have surgery. They put me in a plaster cast and I have to go back at the end of the month for another check-up.

    I am still hurting a little, and very tired!

    Thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers!

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