Moonskin -- I'm so sorry to hear about your dear uncle. I hope that his love for you, and your wonderful memories of him, will help sustain you through these hard times. :cheek
Simal -- I'm also sorry to hear about your situation. I can't even relate to the frustration and worry you must be going through. My thoughts are with you also.
J.D., I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's predicament, too. Gosh, your family is going through such hard times right now, however, I'm happy your daughter has such a fabulous mother in you, J.D. She is lucky in that regard. I'll be thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way. :cheek
My love and prayers go out to all of you; MSC, Sima and JD (:biglove).:grouphug You too, Clipsey, and your flat tire. :cheek
Thanks everyone...............it is terribly frustrating not knowing when we will have power,water or a telephone.The state has faild us miserably and it is very upsetting to watch these "officials" on my parents' television telling us to be patient and that they will get to us.When?
Wow, I'm sorry about your uncle, MSC.
Good luck Sim and JD. Let's hope Ivan goes away so Florida can get back on it's feet.
My problems? Well, the big one is the minor accident I got into today. I was backing out of my driveway watching the van parked directly across from my driveway. (I live on a very narrow street, the van shouldn't have been there as the street is a fire lane, but that is for another gripe). Well this truck comes from the other direction and hit me. I have to get a new housing for my right rear tail light and there is an ugly dent just below it. To get it fixed I would have to get a new quarter panel. I don't think that will happen...just the light will be fixed. His bumper was bent and he has a dent that could be popped out.
The thing is that it was technically my fault since I was backing out. The guy was driving a company truck, so I hope he decides it isn't worth it to contact insurance. I don't want my premiums to go up...plus I am afraid it would cost less than my deductible and my premiums would go up for nothing. I think his damage and mine pretty much equal each other out. Both cars are driveable, and mine is the only one that needs repairing as fast as possible so I don't get a ticket for a broken taillight.
:yeahthat I can go on for days, but I won't.
Originally Posted by speedbump
I have a problem too! My best friend's grandfather is in the ICU for some kind of cancer. She is REALLY REALLY close to Grampy and I don't know how she's going to handle it when he dies. It seems she's in denial because when I talk to her mom, she says Grampy's not getting better, but my best friend says, "I think he'll make a full recovery. He's doing fine!" It may be just a front so we don't know how bad he's doing, but I really want to be there for my friend. I just don't know what to say when he does die. No one really close to me has died so I just don't know how to help her cope. I suppose I could just be there so she can cry on my shoulder, but then what do I say if she says, "Why did it have to be Grampy?" I dont know what to do!!!
I'm really sorry about your uncle, MSC, and your car, Dagwood. :heart :heart
Pinkie, even if you'd had a similar experience it's never easy knowing what to say. Good for you for wanting to be there for your friend -- a shoulder to cry on might be what she needs, and you can let her know you're there if she does. You don't have to have the answers -- it could help her just to have a friend to talk to, even though you can't fix what's wrong.
This thread is a really good idea. So very, very sorry about your uncle.
Sima, Clipse, J.D., and dagwood, my very best thoughts and prayers are with you guys, too, and any and all of your loved ones, as well.
pinkie, having been there and done that, the best advice about being there for your friend that I can give you is to just BE THERE. If she's in denial, when true acceptance finally comes, it's gonna hit like a ton of bricks, and she'll definitely need you to hang on to.
If she wants to cry, hold her and cry along with her. Talk? Do the same. Be silent? Just sit and be silent with her. Pray? Go for it. Rage at God (or Whoever her Big Kahuna happens to be)? Fine. Listen to her. If at all possible, if she can express it, let her tell you what she needs by her actions and what she says.
As for me?
My husband had heart problems that landed him in the hospital two months ago. A week ago yesterday (Tuesday, the 24th), he had to be operated on for his back (keep in mind the heart problems are ongoing) and is recovering from that at present with a titanium rod and plates inserted in his spinal column. His youngest daughter is being an unmitigated, total, 14-carat bitch to me (she's the only one of five that is in the state, btw, and doesn't even bother to call him except every four or five months, or so, let alone come by or at least meet him for lunch someplace), and I've MORE that had enough of her crap, and, oh yeah, gotta go take the car for an estimate on the right front panel.
A week ago this past Sunday, when I picked up my husband from the hospital to bring him home, the hospital cart he had been sitting in (which had no brakes) rolled free and smashed into the front of my car.
And, oh yeah . . .
Had to go running off to the Fire Station today (yesterday) with my husband (it's 3 minutes away), as he started having chest pains again.
That felt good.
Didn't mean for it to turn into "War and Peace", though. Sorry about the length.
Thanks for letting me vent, y'all.
I was glad to see this thread as I'm losing it. My Dad died of cancer a few weeks ago and I'm at their house ( I guess my Mom's house now ) and dealing with brothers and sisters on the phone etc and it's all so complicated. My brother-in-law is at death's door from Leukemia as well and will probably die within the week. My significant other is losing his business, mainly ramifications from 9/11 and the incredible real estate boom in Vancouver. My brother has been hiv + for a number years, but just in the last month he is having problems with his blood that the doctor's can find no explanation for. My mother has aged 10 years from the stress of caring for my Dad, even though he was only bedridden for two months and had a fairytale death as far as deaths go in that he died without any pain, at the place he loved and suffered very little physically. My Dad also banked with the Bank of Montreal of which the nearest branch is 500 miles south, and they need her to come down there because all of their accounts were frozen, plus we can't find the keys to the safety deposit box .......etc. My twin sister is playing the ' I know Mom better than you etc, because I'm a girl etc......game, even though I know she makes my Mother nervous......and is far more relaxed in my company, which I won't say to my sister, because I don't want to hurt her feelings etc, I love her to death but she's so difficult!!!!!!..There's more,but I feel better. I'm not at home where I have people to talk to outside of my immediate family,...........so this was a relief. A note on what to say to the mourners. A simple I'm sorry is all that is required. I hate sympathy cards that say " He's not gone, He's just away", like the departed just flew to Vegas for a week-end. One of the neighbours here bought over a basket of fresh fruit, which I thought was great, as there were so many casseroles and cakes and cold cut platters. Also, if you are going to scatter the ashes, make sure you ask the funeral director, or crematoriam how to open the urn. We stood in the rain for two hours trying to open the urn to scatter the ashes in the Lake, as per my Dad's request. He's still in the urn in the living room.
Nice idea for a thread MSC!
Sorry to hear about everyones losses and troubles, but you have the support of everyone here at the FORT. I haven't been one to mention too much about myself here, but on the few occasions that I've discussed some problems I've had plenty of support and good advice.
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