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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #11931
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Now, I regret throwing my wedding gown in the dumpster.
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    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  2. #11932
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I agree AZ, that's a lovely thing to do. Very, very nice

    I gave mine away( away with several longer dresses) to Cinderella's closet. They give them away to girls who cant afford prom dresses. Its such a nice feeling to know there is a use for something we once loved. Reading this thread makes me both happy and sad. Mostly weepy
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  3. #11933
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    CGN - I am so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time. I'm very glad to hear that so many people around you have provided support to your family. I cannot even begin to imagine the sadness a person must feel after this type of loss.
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    CGN - so sorry for your families and your loss. So very sad and I also don't have words to help you but so glad you have this place to share and possibly help get the words out. I have heard of the Angel Gowns and what a wonderful organization.

    I also have had "friends" that have surprised me when you think those that will be there for you aren't and those that you least expect it, are there for you when you need it. Humans are strange, strange creatures. I hope the hospitals change their systems. Take care.
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  5. #11935
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    CantGetNuf, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. It must be so hard to lose a little one before you've gotten to know him, and to grieve for your son's loss as well.
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  6. #11936
    chavy chaf chaf Asteroids Champion, Bejeweled 2 Champion, GalaGalaGa Champion, Beat The Meter Champion, BejeweledŽ 2 Action Champion, Little Protectors Champion spockwhat's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    CantGetNuff, still thinking and praying for you and your family.
    People always surprise you, but please don't count out those who haven't stepped forward in a big way. Sometimes with everything going on and people everywhere, people don't know how to fit themselves in the mix and feel like it is a time for family and are trying to give you your space. Know they love and care for you as the always have, they may step in later when you least expect it. It's happened to me, and that took me by surprise too... it's like, where were you? Oh, you're here now!

    *hugs* from all of us here.
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  7. #11937
    FORT Fogey CantGetNuf's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Thanks again for all the kind words everyone. I know what you're saying spockwhat. I'm trying not to be mad at people. The only thing I'm asking for is a, "Sorry for your loss." posted on fb. lol My sister and I were talking about how some people just want to pretend bad things don't happen. What is ticking me off is my cousins haven't acknowledged one post about losing my grandson but every other post I put they've "liked". It's like they are completely ignoring it and my sister and I can't figure out why. People, man.

    So my latest complaint is that you're not allowed to complain unless you lost someone. We had storms blow through Monday night and a friend of mine posted that her sister lost her house. Snap your fingers and your house is gone. Can you even imagine? The 10 responders all put, "As long as no one was hurt she can replace her stuff." Sure you can replace your stuff. I can replace my teapot with another teapot but it won't be the teapot my grandmother gave to my mom who gave it to me. And you can replace your house but you can't replace all the memories you had growing up in it. You can replant a tree but it won't be the tree your dad proposed to your mom under. And right at that moment when you come out of your "safe place" and see that everything you've worked for all your life is gone, your kids are scared and wet, you don't know what to do, do you really want someone to shrug and say, "Eh, you can get more stuff." I thought Sept 11th, Katrina, and the April 27, 2011 tornados made the country more compassionate but really it's made us more cold. Now if you didn't lose anyone then nothing bad happened to you.

    A couple years ago I joked that I wish the economy would pick up so I could go back to complaining about work. For awhile there you could complain that you have to work for min wage and your boss yells at you everyday and all you'd hear back is, "Just be thankful to have a job." Whatever. lol!
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Oh, you have every right to be mad! *hugs* I was just wanting you to not give up hope. A facebook post isn't much to ask for... and I'm so sorry you have to deal with that right now.

    Yeah, there are always people who don't get it, just no sense of empathy, or don't want to have any... those 10 responders to your friend's sister were cruel to minimize the extreme loss and pain she must be going through.
    'On the plus side' is about the worst thing anyone can say to someone in despair.

    Take care.
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  9. #11939
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by CantGetNuf View Post
    Thanks again for all the kind words everyone. I know what you're saying spockwhat. I'm trying not to be mad at people. The only thing I'm asking for is a, "Sorry for your loss." posted on fb. lol My sister and I were talking about how some people just want to pretend bad things don't happen. What is ticking me off is my cousins haven't acknowledged one post about losing my grandson but every other post I put they've "liked". It's like they are completely ignoring it and my sister and I can't figure out why. People, man.
    I totally understand your point. Social media is a weird thing. You can't really "like" a post that is about something tragic like losing a family member, but maybe they also feel that they don't know how to respond in words or that a FB post would be too trivial a way to express their condolences?

    Quote Originally Posted by CantGetNuf View Post
    So my latest complaint is that you're not allowed to complain unless you lost someone. We had storms blow through Monday night and a friend of mine posted that her sister lost her house. Snap your fingers and your house is gone. Can you even imagine? The 10 responders all put, "As long as no one was hurt she can replace her stuff." Sure you can replace your stuff. I can replace my teapot with another teapot but it won't be the teapot my grandmother gave to my mom who gave it to me. And you can replace your house but you can't replace all the memories you had growing up in it....
    Now if you didn't lose anyone then nothing bad happened to you.
    I have always looked at these remarks as trying to be optimistic and bring up the person they are directed too. More like "It's terrible that you lost your belongings, but not as terrible as if you had lost your life". I agree that it would be heart wrenching to lose all those memories and they cannot be replaced. I just never thought the people responding that way were intending to trivialize the loss. Note: I tend to read best intentions into people, so maybe I'm just outright wrong in this case!!

  10. #11940
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    What I have learned is that a lot of people are very uncomfortable with death and tragedy. If they weren't raised to be empathetic, they simply may not know how to express anything. I hate it more when people put the burden on the people who have suffered the loss. I hate the "Call me if I can do anything." "Call me if you need anything." These people in pain are not going to call, not wanting to burden anyone. They really need for people to reach out to them. Cook something. Buy some food so that they don't have to be bothered. Make a run for them. You are only limited by your imagination.
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    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

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