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Thread: Talk about your troubles

  1. #10481
    Vidiot 13 is a Winner Champion Poppy Fields's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Or maybe you can just type it out here, JohnnyK. Give yourself a good, long rant. This is a safe place to do it.

    Sometimes, just talking about it (or typing it out) helps you to see the scope of the issue a lot more clearly. Sometimes, it can crystalize it for you and bring you a little peace.

    I'm hoping you get some soon.

  2. #10482
    Mr. (Not so) Perfect Bouncing Balls Champion
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    I think I'd rather not do it out in the open, to be honest. Many people knowing details has been problematic as well.

  3. #10483
    everything under the sun lopevian's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Livin4reality, my heart goes out to you and your family. What you're feeling, especially the anger, is a basic human reaction. I had a cousin who hung himself at age 18, about twenty five years ago. His mother found him. She was racked with guilt and anger, along with the devastating reality that her son was gone. She and her children had a lot of therapy, and a lot of support from loved ones. She made it through, as did the grieving siblings of my "lost soul" cousin. I feel so bad for you and your family. Sending prayers and comforting thoughts your way. You have my deepest condolences. Take care...as best you can. Bless you and yours during this terrible and tragic time, and always.

    Johnny K., do you have a good friend you feel comfortable to speak with? You take care, too.

  4. #10484
    Mr. (Not so) Perfect Bouncing Balls Champion
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    No. Not really. The last people I knew and could talk to are now gone. These feelings and thoughts have been going on for years. Throughout that time I lost a lot of people. Never seeming to learn.

  5. #10485
    9/11/2001 NEVER FORGET. Eastcoastmom's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by livin4reality View Post
    I hope things are looking up for you Johnny K. I don't come into this thread too much because it is hard reading about so much pain.

    My 20yo nephew killed himself. That kid was like one of my own. He was 2 months older than my son, they grew up together. We are all holding each other extra close these days. I feel guilt, grief, anger at him. So many mixed feelings.
    I am so very sorry for your tragic loss. Sending you gentle cyber hugs and my condolences.

  6. #10486
    PWS
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by JohnnyK View Post
    No. Not really. The last people I knew and could talk to are now gone. These feelings and thoughts have been going on for years. Throughout that time I lost a lot of people. Never seeming to learn.
    JohnnyK, I hope you find someone to talk to soon...maybe a support group for people sharing the same problem(s)? I see you are 19 by your profile---if you are in school, or even were recently you could probably call the counseling office of your (last) school for suggestions as to where to look (or even just google local support groups for issue X). It can be a HUGE help just to meet others coping with the same issues, having the same feelings, some of whom may be a bit ahead of you in dealing with them, and able to give you some really useful advice...or at least non-judgemental hugs. While you may feel you have no choice but to gut it out alone, that is SO much harder than sharing the pain...and in the end if you don't talk it out often all you do is push it down and it pops back up again later in your life when you hit a stressful time. The things that are said in groups are confidential....and the people there will be sharing their personal stories with you as well, so you are "even".
    If you don't get help things can pile up so that you see no way out...and as you can see from the surrounding posts, that creates huge pain for others (even though you may feel alone I'm guessing there are many who would miss you that you aren't thinking of)---and deprives you of what might turn out to be a very good life 5 or 10 years from now, hard as that is to believe now.
    Finally, while it sounds as if you are responding to specific life events that are making your life down, do remember that your age is a time that a number of biologically based problems appear, like depression, for which there are very good treatments now...and one reason things may seem so bad may be that your biochemistry is giving you problems. And if it is a bit out of whack, even real life problems seem much much harder to deal with. So the physical check up might also be an excellent idea...but tell the doc what is going on, not just that you want a check up, so s/he knows what to look for.
    Good luck, and let us know how things are going for you.
    Lizard and Poppy Fields like this.

  7. #10487
    FORT Fogey Lizard's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Johnny K I am sorry for your difficulties.
    You can do it!

  8. #10488
    FORT Fogey livin4reality's Avatar
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Quote Originally Posted by JohnnyK View Post
    No. Not really. The last people I knew and could talk to are now gone. These feelings and thoughts have been going on for years. Throughout that time I lost a lot of people. Never seeming to learn.

    Just don't ever ever give up. One step at a time. And for petes sake, just pay someone to talk to, there is no shame in that. Most commuities offer low cost or free counseling if you can't afford it. The only thing to learn here is to never give up.

    Thank you to everyone for your words of sympathy here. My son feels guilty too. I worry about him but I think he will be ok. We talk a lot about it.
    I very much believe in rescuing animals, not buying them.

    Candice Bergen, on finding her dog, Lois, a terrier/basset hound mix

  9. #10489
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    JohnnyK, I'm sorry I didn't see this earlier. Look kiddo... I'm old enough to be your mother... BUT I'm still your friend. I have been very impressed by your posts. You have great perspective and an amazing memory! You've also mastered the English language far better than most and this is why I know you are in a lot of pain - your short posts are not typical and they indicate to me that you don't know if you are coming or going. The thing is I don't want you to build up walls because you've been hurt in the past. I understand what it feels like to have someone judge you unfairly; it is just darn right cruel and it aches deep within. Look beyond those people and realize that there are so many more people who are going to enter your life. You are a bright young man with tremendous promise - and from what I know of you, I'd be proud to have you as my son. The mere way you mention your family shows me that you are a good and loving person who shows respect. Realize your value JohnnyK and wish upon a star. There is somebody up there running the show, you need to just rest and let him take the wheel.
    shyra, Cootie and Photobabe like this.

  10. #10490
    Mr. (Not so) Perfect Bouncing Balls Champion
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    Re: Talk about your troubles

    Thanks very much, everyone. The support means a lot.

    I do have a counselor who I see usually once a week and I see him tomorrow. Today I had a detailed talk with somebody else. I do see some workers at times, who I have recently been more open to.

    I guess I do have some people left, then. It just feels different sometimes.

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