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Thread: Current fads you wish would die off today...

  1. #1021
    Crabby Cancerian remote_goddess's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    My daughters are 9 and 12 (almost 13... 7/5 I'll be the mother of a teenager! Ugh!) And both are allowed to wear tankinis but nothing more revealing than that. I guess I'm fortunate in that both girls have a strong sense of modesty and don't really want to show a lot of skin. My older daughter is, however, entering that clevage-bearing phase where she'd like to wear lower-cut tops. I tell her fine, she can wear it all she wants in her room, but to get out of the door she has to wear a tank top or cami under the shirt. I guess this works for both of us because the layering look is popular and it covers up her clevage (father's genes kicking in here - bigger than mine! So not fair! Grumble...)

    I just don't think it's appropriate to allow (or worse, to encourage) your pre-teen daughters to be viewed as sex-symbols. That happens soon enough as it is, and we don't need to rush things along. What's wrong with pink frills and girl-y clothes for as long as they'll wear them? They're only young once, and everyone involved with raising little girls should enjoy it before it's gone.

    Okay, I feel like crying now. Those days are long gone and I miss them terribly right about now.

  2. #1022
    Anarchist AJane's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    This is not going to be a popular opinion, but we are way too conscious of sexualizing our children. Looking back at pictures of myself as a small child, in the late '60's and early '70's, I was wearing very short dresses (albeit frilly ones) and my shorts were well above my knees. I have an Italian dad and trust me, he wouldn't have let me out of the house if he thought I was showing too much skin. My mom is not exactly a free spirit when it comes to showing skin, either. I have pictures of myself at 11, 12 years old wearing shorts and a halter top. It was the style at the time, and I certainly didn't look precocious (just a fashion victim ).

    Small girls who aren't even developed shouldn't have to worry about "showing skin". Yes, there are sick people out there, but I daresay there were sick people wandering around when I was a child as well. My MIL bought my (then) 7-year-old a string bikini, which I didn't like because I thought the style was too grown-up (my daughter didn't like it either). But she can certainly wear a 2-piece suit if she wants.

    I was watching a Dr. Phil re-run the other day, and there was a dad who was furious because his wife put a short skirt on their 4-year-old. The skirt was short, but there was also a pair of shorts underneath. In no way was the child dressed inappropriately - my daughters own several of those type of skirts. And I really resented that someone would think that I was putting them in something "slutty".
    All my life, I have felt destiny tugging at my sleeve.~ Thursday Next
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  3. #1023
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    I agree with you, AJane. As I'm reading through these posts I'm remembering my own semi-nude childhood. I couldn't be made to wear a shirt out in the backyard until I was ten. I wore a two piece, technically a bikini, when I was twelve. I wore hot pants at the same age, short skirts, halter tops, as did all of my friends, and there was never anything sexually provocative about it. People are just a little too unnerved by the human body and there seems to be a somewhat prurient tendency to sexualize any showing of skin. Sometimes it's just hot out.
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  4. #1024
    Likes Scottish Vikings! talldede's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    Quote Originally Posted by AJane;2453689;
    This is not going to be a popular opinion, but we are way too conscious of sexualizing our children. Looking back at pictures of myself as a small child, in the late '60's and early '70's, I was wearing very short dresses (albeit frilly ones) and my shorts were well above my knees. I have an Italian dad and trust me, he wouldn't have let me out of the house if he thought I was showing too much skin. My mom is not exactly a free spirit when it comes to showing skin, either. I have pictures of myself at 11, 12 years old wearing shorts and a halter top. It was the style at the time, and I certainly didn't look precocious (just a fashion victim ).

    Small girls who aren't even developed shouldn't have to worry about "showing skin". Yes, there are sick people out there, but I daresay there were sick people wandering around when I was a child as well. My MIL bought my (then) 7-year-old a string bikini, which I didn't like because I thought the style was too grown-up (my daughter didn't like it either). But she can certainly wear a 2-piece suit if she wants.

    I was watching a Dr. Phil re-run the other day, and there was a dad who was furious because his wife put a short skirt on their 4-year-old. The skirt was short, but there was also a pair of shorts underneath. In no way was the child dressed inappropriately - my daughters own several of those type of skirts. And I really resented that someone would think that I was putting them in something "slutty".
    I appreciate your opinion AJane. Thank you. Like you, I was wearing bikinis, hot pants, go-go boots and halter tops throughout the 70's. All was fine then.

    What is different now is the 24/7 access to media; 24/7 TV, 24/7 computer, 24/7 movies to watch because we own them, 24/7 AOL music videos, 24/7 text mesaging, access readily available, all the time, instantly. It's a different age now. Like it or not, our kids are inundated with constant images, whereas when we were growing up, we played outside for hours with parents saying "be home before dark." Studies have shown that what we were doing at 12-15, kids are now doing between 8-12, that's alarming to me. Today's kids are growing up much faster than we did, I'm just trying to do my part with my kids to slow that down just a bit.

    BTW, my daughter wears skorts and short, sport shorts, they are cute, I see nothing wrong with them. My beef is with the tiny bikinis on 8 and 9 year old girls, don't like it, nope!

  5. #1025
    I Is Stephanie
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    Oh no. Today I was at my town lake, just doing whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing at the lake, and a little girl, 3 or 4, tripped over me. I looked up to say sorry, and what do I see? She is wearing a bikini. A string bikini. I'm sorry, but I can deal with some of the little kids wearing them, but when a child still has baby fat and sucks on their fingers as they walk, that's pushing it for me. Nay, I, the younger generation, the generation who sees nothing wrong with most of the world the way it is, the generation whose pushing to abolish dress code at schools, I found it to be too much. Little girls, I thought, were supposed to either wear clothes into the water or a little one-piece.
    ...And the strange boy continued to weave in and out of her life, leaving her with a sense of wonder and amazment, but also, a feeling of loss, knowing that life might never be the same again.

  6. #1026
    Teach your children Uncle David's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    I remember when I wore my first string bikini.

    Is it the child or the mother who's making these fashion decisions? On the surface it seems to me the child would want to wear the most comfortable cloths, not the most fashionable.
    The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything it's too late to stop reading it.

  7. #1027
    FORT Fogey cricketeen's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    I have boys and until they were about 8 or 9 had the opposite problem - getting them to wear any clothes!
    "If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough." - Mario Andretti

  8. #1028
    Likes Scottish Vikings! talldede's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    Quote Originally Posted by cricketeen;2454474;
    I have boys and until they were about 8 or 9 had the opposite problem - getting them to wear any clothes!
    Yep, I can relate. I have a 10 year old and he still walks around nekkid.....so proud of himself. Now THAT starts young.

  9. #1029
    Crabby Cancerian remote_goddess's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    Quote Originally Posted by AJane;2453689;
    This is not going to be a popular opinion, but we are way too conscious of sexualizing our children. Looking back at pictures of myself as a small child, in the late '60's and early '70's, I was wearing very short dresses (albeit frilly ones) and my shorts were well above my knees. I have an Italian dad and trust me, he wouldn't have let me out of the house if he thought I was showing too much skin. My mom is not exactly a free spirit when it comes to showing skin, either. I have pictures of myself at 11, 12 years old wearing shorts and a halter top. It was the style at the time, and I certainly didn't look precocious (just a fashion victim ).

    Small girls who aren't even developed shouldn't have to worry about "showing skin". Yes, there are sick people out there, but I daresay there were sick people wandering around when I was a child as well. My MIL bought my (then) 7-year-old a string bikini, which I didn't like because I thought the style was too grown-up (my daughter didn't like it either). But she can certainly wear a 2-piece suit if she wants.

    I was watching a Dr. Phil re-run the other day, and there was a dad who was furious because his wife put a short skirt on their 4-year-old. The skirt was short, but there was also a pair of shorts underneath. In no way was the child dressed inappropriately - my daughters own several of those type of skirts. And I really resented that someone would think that I was putting them in something "slutty".
    In general, I agree with what you are saying. However, my personal opinion is that it isn't the amount of skin showing that I find alarming, it's the fact that the styles emphasize the sexuality of that particular skin. For example, a tank top in a little girl's size is typically slightly higher cut at the neck and probably has a bit wider straps. But my 12 yo picks out the tanks that are spaghetti strap, low cut, and skin tight. So every tank, skirt, short, or skort or yesteryear is not the same as those of today, IMO. And I have no problem with short shorts or skirts, as long as the way she's wearing them isn't emphasizing her, um, assests in a way that is blatantly sexual. This is what I personally disagree with. As I said earlier, I want my little girls to stay innocent for as long as possible. Not naive, just a healthy innocense and I don't find anything at all wrong with guiding them in that direction, whether it's clothing choices or what I allow them to watch on TV/listen to on the radio...

  10. #1030
    Anarchist AJane's Avatar
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    Re: Current fads you wish would die off today...

    Quote Originally Posted by Uncle David;2454471;
    Is it the child or the mother who's making these fashion decisions? On the surface it seems to me the child would want to wear the most comfortable cloths, not the most fashionable.
    I found that once my oldest started school, she had definite ideas about what kind of clothing she wanted to wear. But to be honest, she usually just wants a t-shirt and jeans. As the weather gets nicer, she wants skirts. So I don't really have a beef with what she wants to wear on a day-to-day basis. Our wardrobe "discussions" are usually about her footwear - she loves flip-flops and would wear them in any kind of weather.

    To be honest, it's the grandparents who often buy the clothes that make me think twice about whether or not the girls should be wearing them. I suspect it's because they're not looking at them as revealing - instead, they're looking at them as little-girl clothes, as in little girls who don't have cleavage or any other "assets" they have to worry about showing.

    RG, I can appreciate the challenges you would have with a 12-year-old. I think that's definitely the age where you have to help them make appropriate clothing decisions. I was thinking more about girls (so unfair boys don't have to go through this stuff) the age of my own daughters, who are so very young and don't really have any grasp of what kind of clothes are "right".

    Stephanie's post illustrates the point I was trying to make, actually. A tiny child in a two-piece suit used to be considered "cute" - now it's looked at with disapproving eyes. It seems terribly unfair that a preschooler would be expected to wear a full set of clothes to go into a pool.
    Anyway, if a child is still in diapers or pull-ups, a two-piece is far more convenient for changes than having to yank a wet one-piece off.
    Last edited by AJane; 06-28-2007 at 12:32 PM.
    All my life, I have felt destiny tugging at my sleeve.~ Thursday Next
    I don't want to "go with the flow". The flow just washes you down the drain. I want to fight the flow.- Henry Rollins
    All this spiritual talk is great and everything...but at the end of the day, there's nothing like a pair of skinny jeans. - Jillian Michaels

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