The Oasis - A spot for FORT parents

[ScoutMom]

I completely agree. It's just beyond my comprehension why some people have kids that shouldn't and those that really want kids and would be awesome parents can't have any. I know there's a purpose for everything. I just can't figure somethings out.

[Google]

 

[myrosiedog]

Originally Posted by ScoutMom

I completely agree. It's just beyond my comprehension why some people have kids that shouldn't and those that really want kids and would be awesome parents can't have any. I know there's a purpose for everything. I just can't figure somethings out.

Me either. And you are so right about being there for a kid and making a difference in their life.

You dont' have to be a scout leader or teacher to make a difference. Sometimes it's just being a cool mom who's own kids friends know that they can trust you and come to you. I know my daughter's friends in Florida always wanted to be at our house and would call to talk to me on the phone and it would make our daughter so angry because she would say they are MY friends! But one of her closeste friends also called us mom and dad. But they knew that I could be trusted (within reason, if any of them had told me t hey had done or would do something dangerous, I would have tried to intervene, but mostly they just needed a sympathetic ear)

And I can always tell the kids that get no attention at home because those are usually the ones that have all kinds of stuff to tell me at the museum and want to walk next to me, etc. Most kids are so great, why don't their parents see that?

[Bunny555]

Originally Posted by myrosiedog

And I can always tell the kids that get no attention at home because those are usually the ones that have all kinds of stuff to tell me at the museum and want to walk next to me, etc. Most kids are so great, why don't their parents see that?

Good question......this one kid that I've been talking about was responsible for getting all of his younger siblings to school on time on those mornings when Mom and Dad weren't there. It honestly makes me sick that someone would saddle a child that young with that kind of responsibility. His Mom knows in no uncertain terms how I feel about her as I layed into her for depositing her child with me then going off for the week-end.

[myrosiedog]

Originally Posted by Bunny555

Good question......this one kid that I've been talking about was responsible for getting all of his younger siblings to school on time on those mornings when Mom and Dad weren't there. It honestly makes me sick that someone would saddle a child that young with that kind of responsibility. His Mom knows in no uncertain terms how I feel about her as I layed into her for depositing her child with me then going off for the week-end.

We had that happen one time. The mother dropped the kid off and quizzed me about having guns in the house, dogs, etc. I felt like i was going through an FBI investigation. The kid was supposed to stay with us for 4 hours. Well that came and went. The kid was horribly behaved as well. (it was someone my daughter met at school. They were in 4th grade). Well my daughter got really sick really fast that afternoon. She didn't tell us she had an ear ache because she wanted her friend to come and play. As the day progressed, her ear ache got really bad and we needed to take her to urgent care. We called the mom's cell phone repeatedly, he house phone: nothing. We ended up having to take the kid with us to urgent care. My husband sat in the waiting room with the kid while I took my daughter in to see the doctor. The woman FINALLY shows up 8 hours later at urgent care and my husband ripped her a new one. That child was never invited back either.

I was just floored as she seemed so careful about asking us all these safety questions and then takes off and we can't get in touch with her. What if it had been her child that got sick instead of mine?

How we FINALLY found the mom is that she had said her husband was a fireman and was on duty. My husband asked the kid what her dad's name was and started calling all the fire stations asking for him. When he got the dad on the phone and told him what was going on, surprisingly the mother showed up a short time later. I wonder what it was she was doing and what the dad said to her?

[ScoutMom]

My SIL used to be famous for that one. She'd drop my nephew off for "an hour or so" and three or four hours later, she'd show up. I know that's family and a little bit different, but still rude and inconsiderate. One time she asked me to take my nephew for an hour while she got her nails done. Her husband was at a meeting or something. She said whichever one of them was finished first would pick my nephew up. He was about 3 or 4 at the time. So an hour goes by - two hours to by - and it's getting later and later. I finally called the house and guess who answered the phone? My SIL! So I asked her if she knew where her son was (remember that commercial?). And now I hear her ask her sister (who apparently was visiting), "Where's A?" Now why on earth would her sister, who does not live with her, know where her son was??? I was amazed! Then she said she thought her husband picked him up and the kid was at home. I told her he was in my living room and she needed to come get him. This kid was 3 or 4 years old!!! It's not like he was 13 or something. He was just a toddler!

I don't know why I'm surprised when I hear about stuff like this, but I always am. It's so sad. No wonder the world is in the shape that it is.

[myrosiedog]

Originally Posted by ScoutMom

My SIL used to be famous for that one. She'd drop my nephew off for "an hour or so" and three or four hours later, she'd show up. I know that's family and a little bit different, but still rude and inconsiderate. One time she asked me to take my nephew for an hour while she got her nails done. Her husband was at a meeting or something. She said whichever one of them was finished first would pick my nephew up. He was about 3 or 4 at the time. So an hour goes by - two hours to by - and it's getting later and later. I finally called the house and guess who answered the phone? My SIL! So I asked her if she knew where her son was (remember that commercial?). And now I hear her ask her sister (who apparently was visiting), "Where's A?" Now why on earth would her sister, who does not live with her, know where her son was??? I was amazed! Then she said she thought her husband picked him up and the kid was at home. I told her he was in my living room and she needed to come get him. This kid was 3 or 4 years old!!! It's not like he was 13 or something. He was just a toddler!

I don't know why I'm surprised when I hear about stuff like this, but I always am. It's so sad. No wonder the world is in the shape that it is.

I think we're so surprised because none of us would ever even have that cross our minds to do that to our own children.

Although, I did forget to pick my daughter up from school one day when she was in 3rd grade. I was working then and I got busy and didn't keep an eye on the time and forgot until the school called. That was over 10 years ago and I still feel guilty about it. And boy was my daughter upset!!! I never forgot again, I can tell you that. I feel like an awful parent even admitting it on here.

Ya know, I admit to sometimes feeling that way (wanting to drop her off and not come back), but I would never do it! Just like back in middle school when she would be difficult and I would make myself feel better by researching boarding schools on the internet. (seriously, I would look up boarding schools. I'd have never sent her, but it was a nice fantasy for a little while when I had had ENOUGH)

The other day we had daycamp at the musuem. We had a lot of little monsters, I mean little darlings. (the ones whose parents have had ENOUGH this time of the summer so let's find a place for them to go for a day) and I joked to my "boss" that our next activity was they were going to go out in traffic and learn to be a "traffic cop". But there is a big difference in joking about it and doing it.

[ScoutMom]

I wouldn't beat myself up over that one, MRD. We all get busy and distracted and make mistakes. No one is perfect - least of all me!!! But when the same thing happens over and over and over again - well, there's just something wrong!

When my son was just a toddler - had to be 2 or 3 years old, he fell down the cellar steps. I was standing right there, and he just tumbled down. Just like doing a somersault. Thank God - he wasn't hurt, and actually seemed to enjoy the ride. But my heart was in my throat and I was shaking like crazy.

[myrosiedog]

Originally Posted by ScoutMom

I wouldn't beat myself up over that one, MRD. We all get busy and distracted and make mistakes. No one is perfect - least of all me!!! But when the same thing happens over and over and over again - well, there's just something wrong!

When my son was just a toddler - had to be 2 or 3 years old, he fell down the cellar steps. I was standing right there, and he just tumbled down. Just like doing a somersault. Thank God - he wasn't hurt, and actually seemed to enjoy the ride. But my heart was in my throat and I was shaking like crazy.

She still to this day brings that up that I forgot her at school. But at least now she laughs about it. She was NOT laughing that day.
Yeah, I'm not perfect (just ask my daughter. ) and I know that sometimes we do boneheaded things, but all in all, I think I've been a fairly good mother despite the mistakes I've made. And like you said, I didn't keep doing them. She's made it 17 years without becoming too damaged so that is something right?

Someone was saying to me the other day that she has a problem with people that are always saying they "forgot to eat". I laughed and said I had forgotten my keys, forgotten where I parked my car, even forgotten to pick my child up from school one day, but that I had never forgotten to eat.

so I guess I can laugh about it now too.

[ScoutMom]

I never understood forgetting to eat either - until I did it! It was just last Saturday. I was busy doing stuff, and didn't realize that I didn't eat anything until it was lunchtime and I was STARVING!!! If I could just do that a few more times, maybe I could lose the 20 pounds I'd like to!

[Gutmutter]

That's funny - I have the opposite problem... I forgot that I already ate. I had lunch out with a friend yesterday and went shopping for a gift. Then when I got home I had some fruit and some tea and couldn't figure out why I felt so full. Duh!