The Oasis - A spot for FORT parents

[jin]

Hello all! I think this is a wonderful idea for a thread, and I'm looking forward to some good chats with other Moms! It's hard to find a group to fit in with online sometimes, and I was pleasantly surprised to find this thread. In the interest of full disclosure, I have been a member of this board for a while under another nic...itismetip. I fell out of the habit of posting and also got a new isp, and so when I needed to update my info here, I just changed my nic also. My old nic was a take on my beloved pet dog of 11 yrs who passed away recently. Her name was Tipper, so I thought it would be nice to not have a constant reminder of that online anyway. I barely made a ripple here before anyway, and I doubt anyone would remember me under that nic anyway..Anyhoo...My name is Jennifer, I am 34, married for 11 yrs, with a sweet step-daughter named Ashley,14, who has always lived with us, and a son named Josh who is 10. I haven't read all of the posts, I admit, but I assume I might be one of the older Mothers here...just don't expect me to be wise! ha I really look forward to getting to know some of you and having some fun times here.

[Google]

 

[FinallyHere]

Originally Posted by ineedalife

different level with both of us), but the only thing that makes me laugh is that the house looks as if they've had a lot of fun when I return

I have to admit that when i'm alone with the kids my house usually looks like a hurricane just went through (or at least a stonger hurricane than the one that usually goes through when Mrs FH is with them )

[VeeJay]

FH and AJ - Gorgeous kids! What beautiful cuties! I think yours look just like you FH. I don't know what you look like AJ so I have nothing to compare.

On the topic of Daddies and messy houses - Yesterday, I started my Spring Cleaning early. I boxed up all my son's old toys he's either out grown or just got tired of so I could take them to his less fortunate cousins. This morning I left my two guys (hubby and son) to their own devices when I went to get a haircut. When I got back you can just imagine what I found. Most of said toys scattered on the floor. I wasn't very happy.

Jin, you're only 2 years older than me. My son is 5 though.

[hepcat]

I'm in a mom's club and it exposes you to a WIDE variety of parenting styles. One thing that continues to surprise me is there are many women who don't feel like they can make their husband "babysit" so that they can come to a monthly meeting. I'm not talking about excuses to miss the meeting - we actually set up babysitting at the meeting so that these moms don't have to leave the kids at home with Dad.

My daughter and her dad look forward to "Daddy-daughter" time. Most of the time they take off to ride trains or streetcars (hubby's hobby) and I'd just as soon skip. Sometimes they come home and they've had nothing but ice cream for lunch...but I think it's an okay tradeoff for the wonderful memories they are creating. I don't even think of it as having to trust my husband with her.

[Unklescott]

Time for another Daddy story. I divorced in 1982. My children were 6 (boy) and 4 (girl). I got custody of them. Mom got them back after 4 years. It was very hard on me as a restaurant manager with all the crazy hours, etc. I wouldn't trade the time we had for anything in the world. Even after they went back to mom, they spent plenty of time with me. My daughter just graduated college last year, moved in with me her senior year and is still here. My son moved back in with me his senior year of high school. That could be thread of its own. I'm just amazed at some dads I know who say things like it's not their job to wash clothes, or bathe the kids, etc. I loved it and would hate to think of missing out on taking care of my young 'uns. One of the biggest compliments I remember getting is when my daughter told me (she was about 12) that she wanted to be a parent just like me because she always had so much fun and knew that I loved her. As far as my family, they have both turned out great. I couldn't ask for anything better.

[Muduh]

My kids are all grown and so are two of my grandkids. My two sons are such good dads and share with their boys care. They both are with the boys more than the moms are. The younger one, has a 2 1/2 year old that he keeps every day he is off (he works 24 hours, off 48). They do house work together and fold laundry, then play, play and play. The only thing I don't agree with, but try to butt out on, is the fact that the kid seldom takes a nap. He gets so tired but they ask if he wants a nap??? Has any kid ever felt he "needed" a nap?

[EvaLaruefan]

Unklescott, great story! That's great that you have an awesome realtionship with your kids, good for you.

I want to also compliment my husband and say he is a wonderful dad and husband, he's the one who gets up now when the baby gets up during the night, he changes diapers, cleans etc... I wouldn't trade him in for the world!

[Igotalife]

Unk-I love your father/daughter commentary when you are posting! It always makes me smile.

[Paulie]

Originally Posted by jin

I doubt anyone would remember me under that nic anyway

I remember you. Sent me a PM about Alison Krauss, if memory serves. Looking forward to hearing your parenting insights, too.

BTW, with regard to moms calling home to check on how things are going when they're away, I didn't mean to imply that folks shouldn't call. The women I was referring to were calling home to basically manage the child care remotely. You know, calling at lunch to make sure the kids were eating, calling back to find out what was on their plates, calling to remind Dad to bathe the child at such-and-such a time. That really seemed excessive.

Our kids have always given up their naps rather quickly. My oldest quit taking naps before she was 2, and my middle guy was about 2 when he quit. The youngest one is almost 2, and he still needs them. We actually found that it freed us up a bit when they quit taking naps, but - like others here - we enforce about a 2-hour "quiet time" in the afternoon while #3 is sleeping. The kids can watch videos during this time, and that's pretty much the only time (except for a short half-hour morning video) that they watch TV. The rest of the time they're busy destroying the house with their toys. They do help us clean up at night, though, before they go to bed. That's really nice.

[AJane]

Originally Posted by Paulie

BTW, with regard to moms calling home to check on how things are going when they're away, I didn't mean to imply that folks shouldn't call. The women I was referring to were calling home to basically manage the child care remotely. You know, calling at lunch to make sure the kids were eating, calling back to find out what was on their plates, calling to remind Dad to bathe the child at such-and-such a time. That really seemed excessive.

I'm sure none of us FORT moms do that...